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Mar 2022 · 194
Ian Dankowski Mar 2022
it sits there
mocking me
I shouldn't be awake
but here I am
and its here too
sitting in the corner
mocking me
ticking down
reminding me that I failed
just another night
the clock mocks me
because I wasn't able to fall asleep
Mar 2022 · 93
Ian Dankowski Mar 2022
I have a stained glass window in my life
everyday I fill that window with a new pane
Each new day brings a new color to my window
I don't like to admit it but some days my window gets smaller
Some days I allow a pane to fall off
See stained glass windows require care
they're fragile
and without the proper care and love sometimes they break
but my window has sections
and one break wont take down my window
because every day I fill that window with a new pane
and yea
some days my window gets smaller
but I cant let that break me down
not completely
Mar 2022 · 81
Ian Dankowski Mar 2022
whimsically unaware of those around
we're repeatedly caught in embrace
slow dance circles trace kitchen floors
and a loving sway under backyard shade
completely lost in a single moment
as time slowed around

It was as if life knew we needed a few more seconds
A few more seconds before returning
returning to an unfortunate reality
and where is life now?
when I need those seconds most.
Jan 2022 · 104
Lured away
Ian Dankowski Jan 2022
There are plenty of fish
This may be true
But im not a fisherman
the only fish I wanted was you
Jan 2022 · 479
Swimming alone
Ian Dankowski Jan 2022
Broken cries like whale songs
Find no ears
I've been left alone in my ocean
Because you didn't want to swim with me anymore
Jan 2022 · 88
Trader Joes Love
Ian Dankowski Jan 2022
Grocery lists and reusable vegetable bags fill our date nights
**** Fine dining
I want a Trader Joe's type of love
I want a tiny grapes and cheap wine type of love
Holding my hand in the checkout because I get anxious type of love
that lets rank all the chocolate bars type of love
Picking out flowers in our matching Christmas pajamas type of love

Give me the type of love that cant be bought with
Fine dining and fancy gifts
Because I want your Trader Joes type of love
Sep 2021 · 82
Ian Dankowski Sep 2021
Walking on eggshells
trying to avoid half-healed scars
and here you are throwing blades
thirsting for blood

Weary welcomes
break uneasy air
loom like lures waiting for a catch
sitting in as a replacement
all eyes on my chair
watched by those who crave failure
waiting for another to take the seat
Like dogs
waiting for their meal
Apr 2021 · 173
Woodpecker Windows
Ian Dankowski Apr 2021
warming up after afternoon showers
A comfort shared through piled logs and charcoal embers
There is a peace here that was destroyed
Finally creeping back through like the sun behind the clouds
Everyone aware of the shine once lost
but unwilling to get comfortable
The clouds will always return
but they make the suns inevitable return
more possessive
Apr 2021 · 76
picking up
Ian Dankowski Apr 2021
You rip my heart out
you stomp it on the ground
yet somehow I am the bad guy
because I ask for the pieces
Its okay, you can have them
I need nothing more than my empty shell.
Apr 2021 · 54
Ian Dankowski Apr 2021
And was there really anything left
Held close against my skin
An empty feeling
An echoing heart beats in an empty body
Apr 2021 · 50
You were
Ian Dankowski Apr 2021
and yet you thought of me
I know you were in pain
I know how you felt
confused tears and broken nights
they're all too common for us now
Where are the tears of joy and songs of laughter
I hope we find them again
broken nights are empty
you don't deserve empty
Mar 2021 · 81
10 minutes ago
Ian Dankowski Mar 2021
Trust broken like glass
leaves a ****** mess of cuts and bruises
It is not my job to pick up your pieces
when you've made sure I have to pick up mine

Seeing our past through a lens you decided to break
memories I once held so dear
distorted by your jealousy

A family torn apart
ripped from me with such ease
such recklessness
not a second thought

you were right
I do deserve better
You didn't mean it when you said it
but I mean it now
Mar 2021 · 57
Ian Dankowski Mar 2021
There is a man adrift
his island is small
and his fear is immeasurable

But men don't fear
so what is he
he is alone
floating ever so slowly from land
from a life he once had

This "boy"
he floats towards a future
scared to see what awaits him
he has grown comfortable on his island
despite how small it may feel
but these currents are inescapable
inevitably he will land where they decide
and the boy will find his future

There is a boy adrift
right now his island is small
but his future is inevitable
soon he will dock on distance
unfamiliar shores
Feb 2021 · 65
Ian Dankowski Feb 2021
Shattered glass slicing before it reaches the ground
Support systems crumbled like wet sandcastles
Rockslides under unsure shoes
Their plummet entraps the imagination
To those not in their path
Ian Dankowski Jan 2021
There are only so many smiles I can plaster on
so many jokes I can make to divert my feelings
I may convince others that I am okay
but I know myself better than they do
and I know it is a front
I know my jokes aren't out of real happiness
and my smiles take more effort than anything
why must I pretend
I wish I could be honest
not with them
but with myself
Jan 2021 · 72
43 rights and 29 lefts
Ian Dankowski Jan 2021
There is a reward
for those brave enough to seek it
A treasure chest of shining gold
and shimmering lights
after winding passes turn to peaceful outlooks
This treasure is a land where thoughts are free
and smiles are plentiful
So continue to travel and don't look down
you'll know when you've made it.
Jan 2021 · 252
Move along
Ian Dankowski Jan 2021
You talk down to me
unaware that your insults fall on deaf ears
you try your best to make me as insecure as you are
but I am proud of where I am
and I hope one day you can say the same.
Ian Dankowski Jan 2021
Words spoken like sharp knives
come from the dullest mouths
the worst people feel the highest about themselves
and will try and drag you down to where they really dwell
their insults come from insecurities
meaning you're doing something right
it is hard to look beyond that

but that is because you are so far above
and clouds can be hard to see through
Jan 2021 · 100
Corn Snake Cuteness
Ian Dankowski Jan 2021
Some people leave things with you
even if what they had to offer was fake
because the feelings you gained were real
you may have both changed
but at least yours was for the better.
Ive talked before about masks people put up. sometimes when they take theirs off you no longer like who you see. But sometimes you can take something positive out of that exchange. Look on the bright sides and life becomes more beautiful
Jan 2021 · 63
Ian Dankowski Jan 2021
You can move mountains for a person
who will only ask you to move it faster
someone who would never turn over a rock for you
that demands you do more
and it's hard to see that while you're busy giving them the world.
Dec 2020 · 69
my favorite shade of blue
Ian Dankowski Dec 2020
There's a certain tone set
as the sky trades places with the clouds
as rainy nights turn to clear skies
throwing blue across the sky like a painter to their canvas
The clearest nights come from the rainiest days
and the best days follow the worst.
Dec 2020 · 54
yea cool thats a thing
Ian Dankowski Dec 2020
My friends could tear down an empire
With adventures built taller than castles
and friendships stronger than steel
Dec 2020 · 54
Ian Dankowski Dec 2020
I will never be enough
that's something I now see

I will never be enough
or the person you wanted me to be

I will never be enough
that's one place we'll agree

But I am the person
that I want to be

And I will always be enough
at least for me.
Nov 2020 · 41
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
We add on layers
To protect ourselves
To shield from the outside
And as we grow so does the number of layers
Sometimes life gives us the tools to rip off our layers
and expose our core to those who we need to see them
sometimes we find the people we can be ourselves around

Finally taking off our layers.
Nov 2020 · 91
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
"I don't know what to say"

says too much

I would rather you said nothing
Nov 2020 · 41
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
We climb stairs to reach the top
                                              There is a goal in it
                                    reaching the end
                            but sometimes it feels
                 like there is no end
        and the stairs will continue
until you can't climb anymore.
Nov 2020 · 45
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
My favorite foods no longer taste the same
And my tableside candle has no scent
sunset skies are colorless tonight
And long drives are no longer a release

my life is lived behind sunglasses
distorting everything in front of me
making things darker
making them less livable.
Nov 2020 · 41
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
I laughed today
that doesn't mean I'm happy
and it doesn't mean those things,
have fully gone away
But I laughed today

Maybe tomorrow I'll smile
maybe I won't
but I laughed today

I hope one day I can be the one
that brings laughter to those around me
that may be far away
But today, I laughed
Nov 2020 · 34
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
From the outside the boy is strong
Standing tall to lift those above him
plastering on a smile

on the inside, the boy feels insignificant
He does not want to look ahead
The boy is being ripped apart

The boy holds himself together
because there are people that need the boy
He is unaware that that makes him significant
at least to others.
Nov 2020 · 43
Sea Anemone
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
Sandy toes from shower runoff
washing away
my favorite day
a memory I would never
clean off

more interested in sea anemone
and crashing waves
maybe if I was more important
I could catch your attention

Days in the sun are often
less sunny looking back
where the best memories
become the worst to  relive

-Sea Anemone
Nov 2020 · 42
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
"Get down from that thrown of yours"
"you have not fought to sit so high"
"you do not deserve such prestige"

These words speak like daggers
given more power than my thrown
spoken by people who do not know my fight

Deserve is a disgusting word
used by people
who are afraid of what they will never have
Nov 2020 · 43
I'm still on a hunt
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
I went on a hunt
for a beast so rare
that only its stories loomed in the air

I went for a hunt
deep in the woods
for a creature, I thought to be misunderstood

I went on a hunt
for something so rare
But I know that happiness is somewhere out there.
Nov 2020 · 50
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
I finally found happiness
But does it matter
If I cant share it with you?
Nov 2020 · 32
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
She made me feel comfortable
Being who I was
She took off my mask
Because she liked who was under it
But endings are inevitable
And comfort breeds discomfort

My insecurities with her were pushed aside
But they have crept back in
Tormenting me every day
And so I wear a mask
No longer having somebody to take it off.
Nov 2020 · 44
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
There is a tulip field hidden from the public
A sea of pink pedals hidden behind
Snow-capped mountains

Her hair blows among the petals demanding
Sunlight dances across her face with an energy only
By her energetic swing
The clouds move across the sky with the same
Complexity of her eyes

There is a heat in the air but the
Dew on the grass keeps her feet cool as she dances
In the sunflower forest
Every flower reaching out to her
unaware of the entire world outside of her

She has almost forgotten me yet I haven't taken my
Eyes off her
She is Finally and fully at peace
the world is still waiting in anticipation for her
Next step

My heart races the birds who fly above
As she returns to me
Sitting at my side to rest her head

I forgot about the world for a moment
There under the willow tree
Longing for the love of

Nov 2020 · 31
May we rest?
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
Momma pushed us away from home
Terrifying yet not unfamiliar
She acted brave but we understood her fear

We took one last look as we hurrying into the unknown
The smoke burns your eyes
But you must travel on
Knowing what was coming was far worse

Of  course, it was all worth it
For their factories are more necessary than our homes

We can rebuild of course
But only for so long
Soon we will have nowhere to run
Maybe then they will be satisfied
Maybe then we can rest

We may be loud
But we have no voice
So we continue to run, rarely looking back

-May we rest?
Nov 2020 · 38
Queen of colors
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
Her throne was green
Soft for her rest
A temporary home for her
A place to rule in peace

Her kingdom was yellow
And smelled of a hot summer day
Protective walls built to keep her safe

Her gifts were pink
Sat in the laps of her subjects
She feared their judgment
But welcomed their love

She was a queen of colors
Green, Yellow, and Pink
She will be given all the colors
when she returns to her kingdom

-Queen of Colors
Nov 2020 · 37
Sky lioness
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
A cranberry sunrise carpets field bustling with life
Unaware of the role she plays
Dancing feet allowed only by their anonymous queen
She flows through every system
Her light gives the smallest grasshopper springy legs
She gives the lion muscles large enough to take down any pray
She rules with a warmth that brings light to her kingdom
Until it is time for her rest

The fields seem quiet when it is the king's turn to rule
Ruling in dark and silence
He is no king, for he has lost his power
Now forced to chase his queen and watch over her subjects.

-Sky Lioness
Nov 2020 · 106
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
My life would be unlivable without my painkillers
They are my only release
I am sometimes irresponsible with my painkillers
You would think I would protect them
Hide them away and never lose them
But I have my faults

My friends are my biggest painkiller
they keep me grounded
My family keeps me loved
And for that I am grateful
And nature keeps me humble

These are my painkillers
My escape from what plagues my mind
My life would be unlivable without my painkillers
but is everything because of them
Nov 2020 · 35
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
Do you think the sea got jealous
when the fish grew legs to walk away
What's so bad about the sea?
Her depth is daunting
And her waves are harsh
But the sea feels beautiful

The sun dances across her surface
And schools of fish illuminate her shallows
The sea is the most beautiful blue
After the most violent storms
Or the sunniest evenings
The sea feels beautiful

But the sea can see his fears
She does not blame the fish for being afraid
Because she can admit her weaknesses

As large and beautiful
As mighty and proud
As beautiful as she may feel
She feels empty without him

Nov 2020 · 42
To Those I Love
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
It's only ever one text away
Or rather no text
To be left

The constant fear of being alone
Making sure I'm never alone
Screaming in my head
Keeping me awake

My cries for help fall on unwanted ears
And my screams are left unheard
By those, I needed to hear them most

And when I pull you close
It feels as if my arms are extending
Pushing away those I needed
Abandoning myself in a sea of loneliness
I've done it to myself haven't I?

-To Those I Love
Nov 2020 · 64
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
Life is a terminal disease
A birth defect that is inescapable
there is no treatment, no cure

Broken down unable to continue
The fight is an uphill battle
Yet the hill is ever-growing
An unobtainable peak

And we fight
We strive for the top knowing it doesn't exist
A helping hand pulling you along the way
Wishing you never stop

Together the fight is easy, seamless almost
But one day there will be no hand
Endings are inevitable
And goodbyes are a disease

Nov 2020 · 41
The boy
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
An unpeaked emerald mansion in the background
Hidden away in his prereferral
Memories of piebald skies and sapphire crested seas
Inequivalent in size and purpose the boy is hidden.

Yearning to be needed by our mother
Attempting to be lost in the right places
Never quite enough but an overburden
Of too much

Running off to a hidden home undivided
By the grasp of them
Fearing descent into a  relentless tomb

Alone the boy has nothing but his ideas
Lonely but not alone with an
Unfounded idea of weakness and
Unwillingness for fear
Feeling incomparable and insignificant
Looking at what else is out there

The stars
Arent they beautiful?
A shame, He'll never meet them.

-The Boy
Nov 2020 · 42
Upon my return
Ian Dankowski Nov 2020
There are tales of a thrilling adventure
among the highest pillowy mountains
deep in the fuzziest caves
where movie soundtracks are drowned
in constant giggles

There are songs of a laughter
only heard by the most daring explorers
a laughter of absolute uncontrol
turning unwillingly into the cutest snorting

the smell of comfort loomed from spattered candles
unable to warm the air as intensely as their love
yet everything is temporary
adventures must come to an end
candles must be blown out
and pillow forts must be cleaned up

until their king and queen return
to rebuild what had been torn down.

-Upon my return

— The End —