Dancing romancing over our drinks
Smiling grinning into a toilet that stinks
Kissing clinching in a quiet spot
Chilling silliness happening quite a lot
Walking slipping along a dim lit street
Laughing holding as unsteady on our feet
Waiting eager for a taxi to come along
Entering settling into home where we both belong

Entrenched in your arms
I feel cosy and loved
Hypnotised by your charms
I feel blessed and lucky
Listening to your voice
I feel warm and settled
Sharing your thoughts
I feel humble and proud
Embracing your trust
I feel complete thank you

Those sloppy silly eyes
And long gangly arms
That touch the bits they shouldn’t
Then reveal the parts we wouldn’t
Not in public anyway

They mimic our every move
And laugh just like we do
As they swing by their toes
Before slowly picking their nose
Regardless of who is there

Chattering from the trees
Rolling through the leaves
Squatting on the ground
Wildly running round
Madness on a lazy sea

Say hello to Arthur
Tap on the glass to Paul
Do something rude to granny
Spit out your food at Danny
Welcome to the world of chimps

Yeti my friend why are you there
Hiding in the trees like you care
Yeti my pal what do you want
With me

Yeti my friend I am not hairy
Large in size and equally scary
Yeti my pal I can see you
In the trees

Yeti my friend do you talk
About disco music and colourful chalk
Yeti my pal it’s rude to stare
From behind dust bins

Yeti my friend are you a thinker
Do you scout for bits and have a good tinker
Yeti my pal please be quiet
Your waking up the dogs

Yeti my friend where did you go
Back to the alps and the silly snow
Yeti my pal please come again
Next time I’ll show you YouTube

Throw the scraps out
So the rats can have a feast
Of fried chicken and cooked ham
A sausage roll from an infants pram
Left for dead on a flattened kerb
A turkey sandwich with a sprinkled herb
Hungry old foxes will eat

Throw the scraps out
For cats to smell
Donner meat and spindly chips
Jaffa orange all peel and pips
*** noodles and microwave meals
Caviar under BMW wheels
For birds to dine on

Throw the scraps out
Feed the mice
Corn on the cob with butter on top
Honey combs from a bees stop
Bird seed under a scarecrows smile
Cabbage and swede from the vegetable pile
For weasels to run away with

I cloned myself today
Changed my eyes to ocean blue
I cloned myself today
Made my nose nice and new
I cloned myself today
Removed those worrying thoughts
I cloned myself today
Got the stress levels all down to noughts
I cloned myself today
Inserted confidence and a healthy glow
I cloned myself today
I gave me energy so life could flow
I cloned myself today
My complexion no longer pale
I cloned myself today
So good looks can finally prevail
I cloned myself today
I’ve buckled ready for the ride
I cloned myself today
To see if the grass is greener on the other side

A chance encounter in the rain
The shortest minute of my life
But etched all the same
So little that meant so much
Four words
Beautiful but yet so simple
Thankyou so very much
No thankyou
For showing me kindness
Missing to me for so long