Just cause neither of us believed
In happy endings
Does not mean we don't deserve one

Just cause you grew up knowing pain
So much better than love
Does not mean you shouldn't learn

Just cause life has not been fair
Or easy on you
Does not mean you should give up

Or am I wrong

Should we just give up
Just cause we're hurt
Just cause we were once broken

Should we allow them
Those things that broke us
To shape us

Or does that crucify you

Onto the cross of pain and torment
Living within the rumors
Crafted only to destroy you

Can one leave their skeletons buried
Smile and truly believe it
Even while dying a little everyday
People change just as time does
Lines and lines between
Secrets overlapping like waves
Crashing into the shore
Crashing into others life's
Conflicting decisions questions
Left unanswered abandoned
Over time we are forgotten
Our bodies left to float
Lonely across the ocean
In the middle of a hurricane
Stirring up chaos with our minds
In the middle of nowhere
Going north yet still never home
I don't know what to write anymore
I don't where to begin or if the end is near
I'm not okay, but I can't say
Everyone is so proud of me for "growing up"
I can't do anything to make it better
That would be immature and childish
I'm 21 turning 22 next year
They say it's great that I've grown out of it
That phase I was going through
That "drowning in my misery"
"acting out to seek attention" phase
Oh, how I wish, how I pray
Let that be just a phase
But if only that was true
I would not have to feel this way now
Why did it comeback,
How do we make it end.
Depression creeps in
Like a shadow approaching,
Closing the distance of our steps
As the sun rises and falls.

When do we learn to know,
How to walk away from pain.
The sadness lurking
Silently behind our eyes,
No real reason or explanation
Just a tiny escaped tear.
Day one again
Another begins,
Back to one
Another chance.

To choose.
to change.

So what's your choice?
What could be mine.

To choose to live or to stay;

This or that way, slipping...
Popping pills one
Knocking two down
Pretty sure just three

Where'd the rest gone !?
**** have you done, what !
The tyrants arise and smirk
Taking out their white coats

Pulling you further away
Towards the sirens
Taking you to the ultimatum
Another no more

You become their puppet
No life to live; air to breathe
You become no man
No person not an object

If you want to run, RUN
Away from the labels
Leave those tiny fractures
If you want to fly

Leave it all behind...
How hard could it be
To turnover a new leaf
Get a new lease
Watch and just feel it
As another leaves
Stealing off with my sanity
Well I blame idiocy
From the ruins we flea
Like falling leaves
Trailing the wind
Into the swells of the sea
Like little me
Huddled beneath
Frayed velvet cushions
Making out with hard liqueur
Smooth as your words
Burning me like your lips
Tongues slipping easily
Through sour teeth
Sharp as blades
You cut me open
With nothing but a kiss
I really dont know: will be the title of this post poem will last words epitaph farewell whatever I can't be bothered

Because: I really don't.
Well, for one how, when, why... Or why not
I'm just tired, really really tired..
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