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Cole May 20
I've been hiding myself for so long
I almost forgot who I was.
I've closed off my light
To please others,
But I was never happy
Being that perfect little girl

I am not.
Your terms do not define me.
Girl. Boy. Non-binary.
Who cares what I am?
I am anything.
I will not remain that

I am far beyond what you have told me to be.
Cole May 18
Holding me
But I soon realize
It's just in my head
He is not to be seen.
As I grow up and open my eyes
What if I was the savior I needed.
The villain just a cookie cut.
The God they speak of never came down.
I have been left here on my own.
Struggling with myself.
The eternal hell I live.
boy or girl
right or wrong.
God wasn't there.
I get older.
I realize
I'm alone again, of course.
We are one person.
Both of us.

People watch me always
Will I jump? Will I soar?
"SHE is a kid."
"SHE doesn't know."
"What's your name?"
Emily. Cole!
Cole Oct 2020
Loving you was my mistake
But I'll still love you 'till I break.
Just stay with me today.
I want this
If you don't
Then you don't have to stay.

Loving you was like a moth and flame
You lured me in, then played your game.
But I still stay here everyday.
I need this.
I liked this anyway.

Loving you was so bright
When you smiled you were my light.
But then that smile faded away
Now I'm lost
In the dark you left behind.

Loving you was like a lullaby
We listened close to the others mind.
But you said that it might change.
You gave up.
You left this anyway.

Loving you was my mistake
I still love you anyway
But you turned your back on me.
I don't like this.
I don't need this.

Loving you was my mistake
You stopped saying it back.
It really feels like hell
When I see the old texts you'd send.
I don't want this.

But I can't stop
Loving all that you do
cause I love you.
That, angel, is true

Cole Oct 2020
He protects me in the dark
He shows up in my dreams
as My lover and my friend
And so much more.

And She shows up when I'm scared
and whispers of what I'm unaware
That They don't love me back
that I'm alone.

He holds me tight he tells me that
She lies to me every night
But for some reason I close my eyes
And I whisper that she's right.

She smiles with that evil grin
She knows that she's won again.
And his eyes are wide, and his light dims.

They aren't the same no they aren't.
I feel them, No matter where I go
They follow me home

I wish I could see him, in my wake
His eyes are so blue.

She shows up no matter what,
that persistent, young woman
She seems so beautiful, but then she screams.

He holds me tight, to not let go.
she grabs my arms.
She told me so,
She'd haunt me forever, bring me low.

He turns his back, to protect me,
I hug him tight, in my dreams.

I wish that he was alive.
So we don't have to say goodbye.
And I don't even know their names.

I see these people
These two,
In my dreams.
And I feel them When I wake.
Cole Oct 2020
I know that I'm a F up, mess up,
A really big mistake.
I know that you won't tell me, but I should run away.
I know that you don't want me, like me,
Hope to see me smile.
So I just stay here in my room, dreaming for that day.

Cole Sep 2020
Oh you left me here alone,
And I can barely pick up the phone.
Cause you show up in my dreams,
When I don't ask you to be.
Oh You left me
And I'm lonely.
Guess I'm not over you.

I thought I was over you
At least a little bit, it's true.
Oh this is happening
Give me a moment
To catch my breath.
And I'm scared now,
Cause you're not answering.

You have a girl with you,
Is that true?

And I get it, I'm not for you
I'm not for anyone, anybody yet.
I'm fine, I swear that it's true
I'm just not over you.

I wish I was over you.
As I fight the urge to text or call,
Cause it will never be the same at all.

You left and you moved on.
I'm here singing this song.
That's okay, I swear I'm fine,
I just thought that you were mine.

Oh this is happening.
Don't look at me now,
Cause I can barely make a sound.

You seem happy,
And I'm lonely.
Cause I'm just not over you,
No I'm not over you.

At least I don't have to see you
Everyday anymore.
And At least I can't stare
while you hold her tight.
Please don't hold her tonight.

I don't wanna hear about it,
How your hands together fit.
Does her smile light up your day
While I'm here, fading away?
Oh, Do you say you love her
Just like you told me, the same mistake?

I used to be her, I know
I guess I won't pick up the phone.
If you're happy when I'm lonely.
Then just stay away from me.

I am fine now, I swear this time
I'm glad crying is not a crime.
If you knew how I felt about it all,
Would you still not call?
You said you love her too.
When I'm not over you.

Cole Sep 2020
We've been friends for quite a while
We've always made each other smile.
I'm not sure when I felt a change
But now my feelings for you have a range.

I'm not sure if I like you yet,
These feelings might not be set.
I know I don't want to hurt you,
And deep down, I'm scared that you'll leave too.

And if I wait any longer
Maybe they will get much stronger.
But if I tell you too soon
You might run as far as the moon.

You might like me, I'm not too sure
And if you do, we are our cure.
I still don't know if I like you
But I want to try, I really do!

I'll open up my mind and heart
As long as you don't tear it all apart.
And if we crumble back to two
Just know I'll still be here when you feel blue.

So if you read this, at any time,
Please just send me back a little rhyme.

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