I can't erase your name
You may see a smile,
You might see a grin.
Pain is my only kin.
How can I live?
I can't feel anything but hollow?
I'm a puppet—your strings I must follow.
~You string me up, and string me along~
To dance to your hopeless song.
I trip to feel alive, and die to forget.
I don't want to ever feel again.
Now, lost in your web, I don't even care for living.
This relationship feels like a race.
Forgot' what it feels like to just be okay.
I'm alive, but I feel insane.
I'd cry but I'm constantly replaced,
by other boys' bodies, and their "traits".
Even being so empty,
you see a heavy weight.
My mind is drained, I can only see so far away.
My eyes are clouded by shame made by pain.
Pain made tears, and tears became rain.
The seeds you planted in my heart ached', as they began to germinate.
Rain grew heavy, with the weeds that grew deadly.
Rain became a hurricane.
The wind took a turn, too late.
I claw my eyes—raw, at the end of each day.
Who's responsible, who's to blame? I asked you to stay,
But you wouldn't & the rain,
won't wash away your stain.
I can't erase your name,
and it comes about in all I say.
Probably because it's written across my face,
where rain streams cover the places,
that your fingertips used to trace.
By: Ashton Conor Amstutz