What are these emotions?
woolen sweaters that smell of moth *****

Do you know how moth ***** smell?
the reek of self-pity
indulgence
shame
an aroma so strong
everyone can smell it radiating from me

Do you know how the wool scratches?
wrapped around my insides
their hot embrace
itching without cease
an intensity growing until it burns
if I could see the irritation
those ugly red raised bumps
I would see hundreds
covering every inch these sweaters touch

Why is it so hot in here?
I’M BURNING
oh
because I’m wearing so many sweaters
a salmon sweater
a teal sweater
a lavender, marigold, and beige sweater
so many sweaters I can’t count
colors all horribly ugly
covering up the pure black inside
if I could just see it untainted
it would be beautiful
black so deep and endless
to lose myself inside of
I WANT to lose myself inside of it

these ******* sweaters

Why don’t I just take them off?
a lovely black box
right over there
small
takes up such little space
YES
take them all off
cram them into this too small box
shove them in fast
FASTER
now wrinkled
and a little damaged
not that I care

Why should I care?
wait
I don’t
I don’t care much about anything anymore
and it’s lovely