Words are so precious

I search for them like buried treasure

Like panning for gold

Tiny nuggets of truth in a dirt slurry

It takes so much work,  it's not worth the time.

The pills
**** my creativity
  when the seratonin flows
   the poetic juices run dry

its taked much
enrgy write just line
tired this fkd world
hands hrut
chest tight

The end approaches
Surrounded by one last burst of color
A desperate final flurry of activity
Those that can, fly away
Off to warmer sunny days
Even in death trees carpet the ground with color and give what they can to to provide warmth and food to others.

Cold comes, white fluff obliterates all
Memory of what once was
The world becomes hushed, flat, enveloped nothingness
The white, all colors combined into one
Takes all life, wraps it up.
Frozen, killed, stored up for a resurrection day.
No one remembers what once was there.
Death is white cold
We fall down in flames of yellow, red and gold.
Down to the green grass to be covered and forgotten.

I guess a woman's love wouldn't help me
... That's what the shrinks say
You must find love inside yourself.
... I don't even care if she loves me
I just want to feel desired.
Used, is close to feeling useful

But I am unloved, no attractive woman has ever said I was good looking.   Fu#&ing  A

I'm f'ing done with life.

She's abandoned me to hell
I've lived here so long
She took me out for a walk
And I saw the light
I heard music and felt young.

I thought I had something to give
But I've been ****** to hell
No more looks in my direction
I can give but not receive.

Can't I get something?
I die alone every night
I would like to die for her
But she's abandoned me to hell

I've been here so long

I cannot tell what's in her mind
I cannot tell her what's inside of mine.
I'm playing checkers with a chess master
On a board with no boundaries
Did she ever love me?
Does she beleive I ever loved her?
What is love?  Patient, kind, not jealous, not puffed up.  I must prove it to her
I don't know how,  I'm locked up.  

Friends don't know how each other taste.

She bends down from her throne
"I have one minute for you".
But no pressure.

I'm so tired
  I don't know why
   Please give me a reason
    I really would like to live...

Circling overhead
Riding currents of stench
Falling upon the carcas
Sitting alone on the fence
Tumbleweed wanders
Sun bleached bones

I want to be loved
I will pay,
Not in that way.

I'll pay with tears,
I'll pay with time.
Just tell me what to do,
I need help!

I'm so helpless,
I want to die
Then I won't realize
That I'm lying alone

I'm cursed
I'm *******

Dear old Mom
Can I go to sleep now?
I've done my chores
For forty years
I made my bed this morning
And used the soap when I took a shower.
My clothes are folded and put away
Not sure if I'll need them another day.
I kissed your check
And I love you more than words can say.
I'll wait till you've gone to bed
But my eyes are heavy
I'll rest here for a bit.
Wake me up when you turn out the light
For the last time....

Dream in silence
Dream all day
Dream of light
Dream of May
Disappear the strangest way

I leave these things behind
To those who come after me
I have nothing but clothes and tools
not even un-requited love
I had mostly words, left unspoken
I leave no hope, it's all been taken
One thing i can bestow
Is this lesson,
Almighty GOD is in heaven.

Goodbye dear friends
I never had
the strength to truly know
what a blessing your
friendship could bestow.

Your will to live
the best life ever
Is strong and alive
Every day getting better

Thanks for the moments
full of lessons
I am a child
scared and lonely
on my way to no where
drifting slowly.

Looking at the empty room
I once lived in
luxury is over rated
modesty is understated.

You
You all are my ears
   You hear what this world ignores
I
I shout with this pen
  I write a placid verse
   Trying to express this curse
They
They cannot hear what does not speak
  A frozen tounge is blessed but meek

Just like the field, After a rain,
  You've seen those flowers
You can't forget it.
  Golden drops on every petal,
Each one unique,
  Tests your mettle.

Somewhere down deep
  I want to do it,
Run right through it!
  Burst those drops
Let fly those petals!
  
  Your golden curls
shine and glitter,
  With a toss you make
Them quiver.
  Deep inside I want to do it,
Let my hands wander through it.

I  bite my lip
  And bide my time,
A million rainbows will be mine.

We are together
... I will not be alone
We live in the sun
... I will not suffer in darkness
We can choose our path
... I am not chained down
We sail the open seas
... I am not drifting or lost
We are braided together
... A "knot" forever

She loves life
. She laughs nice
.. She looks good
... She loves Mom
.... She's known love
..... She'll live long

I want more likes!
I want more Suns!!
  I want more HEAT!!
Make me famous
Make me Known
  Make me POPULAR!!
DO IT NOW

Armor and mud
Sword shield and blood
Drum beats and fire,
March on the Shire.
Fiddle and Fife,
Spittle and knife.
The piglet squeals,
Fat crackles and peels.

Your tentacles hideously rise,
from the black where you sleep.
Saucer sized suckers
find the prize they seek.

Your fearsome battle scars
tell frightening tales
from undersea wars
with great captains and great whales.

Un-needed in the deep
Your black uncaring eye
Sees all and nothing at once
Where no light Rays fly.

Released from the depths
Your fury knows no bounds.
You bring back your quarry
Without making a sound.

Life is a Bi-ach
Not a beach

Bring your mi-ti
Don't preach

Sing a song
Dream of Billabong

Corona and cabanas
Life is bananas

the tide of time
On your beach or mine
Will break and foam
With an endless moan
Take the oars and pull
For your life is more
Than what lies on shore!

By myself for forty years,
Alone at home with my beers

An aged flask
A caged mask

Are we all just home alone between our ears?

In the silence of this room
My thoughts receed into the doom

Are we all just deaf and dumb?
A newborn cries for his mum.

Its slipping away
39 years of tripping and drifting
Bumping and grinding.
My brain is bruised,
And my heart is hurt.
I'm not sure who I am.
I've got no roots
No place to call home.
The place that is my home I hate.
I've wasted time,
I want it all back.
How could anyone love me when I don't love myself?
Blah blah blah
Now I've wasted your time too.
I'll be alright
I just have to fight through