At night my heart weeps
It sweeps into the dawn of the day
This feeling so heavy in my chest
It feels as if I'm buried 6 feet under without a coffin
Laid to rest
Death is not what I'm entailing
It's rather the burdens of uncertainties
Thoughts of failing
Thoughts that hurt me
I just wanna be loved
And be with someone who deserves me

Intensity scares me, but fear is what keeps me alive
Like prey running away from its predator
That feeling inside
You know what you must do
Even if it leads you to die
A reflection of yourself
Stare deeply into your eyes
You aren't afraid, this is just
Adrenaline in disguise
This is what I live for
Learning life lessons
Scattered across a map
Through every living being
And also deceased
Now I know what it feels like
To have a moment of peace
I have more that I must learn
Intensity is what I yearn
I know nothing but I feel everything
My heart in my chest
Young, rhythmic, filled with blood
Once I'm laid to rest
My life will continue to flood
Other people's hearts
Inspire them to discover life
Challenge their beliefs
Live, die, rebirth as if you are an ever changing form of art

Sleepless nights and alcohol
Prolonged days on caffeine and adderall
Running too fast
I'm out of breath
I sit down to recollect myself
Ponder about death
I swallow a breath of fresh air
And think to myself life isn't all that fair
We live to die
And die to live
As I sit there
I realize life is about what I give
I continue about my days
Sometimes I dwell about my thoughts in a negative haze
I destroy all aspects about the world up until this time
And create a new world
A world in which I shine
Duality is essential to the way I live
A black pool of space
Five shining stars thus take that place
A never ending cycle of give and take
A world that isn't fair
And that's more real than it is fake

**** me dry
withered away
cooked in the sun like a raisin
take all my juice
now your soul is full of my fruit

villainous intentions it seems
i've been through the streams of trauma
tf u mean
working hard to correct my mistakes
being born to a household of lies
seemed like my fate
i realize how to ascend
but i'm stuck in the past
i don't know how to mend
these people bleeding in my arteries project & inject since the start of me
they went through the same thing
but so many excuses
as to why they can't evolve and be free
but they don't realize it
they numb themselves of their destiny
they throw their pain out onto humanity
i realize how it's so ****** up
that their childhood trauma got them ****** up
leading into adulthood and the rest of their lives
it seems
projecting their hatred and pain onto their offspring
i have to be stronger and more aware than my predecessors
and i notice how a lot of ppl in my life were the stressors
it's no wonder our generation is tired
bc we've carried the weight of the liars
yes they're liars, bc they lie to themselves
how they're a good person and they've done us well
******* i call, they've ignored for far too long
as i sit here crying, i realize that i'm strong

360 degrees
365 days
i find myself back here
a rotating haze
crocodiles in the lake
waiting to strike
i've been chewed
digested and reborn
cycle of life
upon resurrecting, i have a bit more knowledge
knowledge of the world, self and my worth
but it's like the crocodiles are painted red, waving gracefully in front of my gaze
i'm a bull that rams through with everything in my way
hidden and undetected is how most know about their nature
but they're just red flags that i chase without a chaser
i'm tired of being digested and ****** lifeless
i've been resurrected so many times
it's like i have this unlimited energy supply
charging and giving to things that i realize aren't worth it
it reaches full capacity and destroys my circuits
which is why i come back to this space in time
all hazy
burnt out
i've resurrected once again
with more knowledge than before
and now i know not to become aroused to the sight of red flags anymore
not running in loops or patterns
just running freely
here i am, 365 days later
full circle, a human that has learned from the past
that still has more to do
but moving forward with a different pursuit

Crooked and swift
The needle scratches
She has the sun in her hair
As she blissfully dances
Smiles and longing eyes
I recall
Warm yet distant
I fall