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Some life’s eternal purpose,
I take notes upon notes on the screen in front of me,
Questioning every little breath I take,
What the **** am I doing here?

Yet, I stand corrected,
As a fleeting moment of grace comes fluttering forward,
Lord knows I haven’t really tried,
To encapsulate this moment.

And so I have another existential crisis,
Where I claim to myself that I know it all,
Without realizing,
I know nothing at all.

Yet, I stand corrected,
Filling my brain with some kind of knowledge,
On a city upon a hill,
My teeth are clean and razor sharp.
AvengingPoet Nov 2018
***, I’m so overwhelmed
I’m so tired
I got a full eight hours
Yet I never caught up at all
And I’m tired once again
And again

I’m not quite sure how much longer I can function like this
But a warm embrace has saved me from a graceless death
Without it,
I’m not quite sure
Where the **** I would be

I sit around and read all these things I’m told to read
To get good marks
For some apparent reason
I think I’m learning
But honestly,
I haven’t been sure for years

I’m getting by, I’m sure it’ll be all right
Yet I stare out the window, expecting something more
Is this really all there is?
Another cup of coffee, another thing to read, another thing to write
This is all that is expected of me

In all actuality, I don’t ******* matter
But maybe that’s perfectly okay
Perfectly okay…

It’s so cold outside
And I need a new vision
I hope it comes to me soon…
I hope it comes to me soon…
AvengingPoet Oct 2018
Oh ****
This **** is gonna ****
But I’ll get my numbers up
And make it some day

I suppose I can breathe today
The air is grimy
Yet I still feel alive for a few seconds
This rain fills in a bucket
I’ll carry it to a farm
And live some inconsequential simple life
All by myself

Oh but how silly does that sound
You’ll never escape the noise
It is going to be there forever
Nagging and nagging and nagging
Until you die

You may ask what this is
Oh don’t you worry
It is of no concern
No alarms and no surprises

I tell you to come here
I whisper in your ear
“It’ll be okay”
Not quite sure if I believe it either.
AvengingPoet Oct 2018
Oh the glorious content
And the endless 1’s and 0’s
Lord I can barely breathe

I’m asking for some relaxation
But all I’m getting is a more stressful equation
Oh the infinite content

A shame that we want to entertain us all
Without asking what the **** we’re even doing
Make sure you follow all the news
It’s too late, I have new content I must obtain
From timelines and feeds
That are constantly calling
This silly amount of selfish content
Oh, I feel it has given me so much
But has it given me anything at all
Except a static reaction
That gives a cold sense of empathy

For only a brief moment...
For only a brief moment...
AvengingPoet Sep 2018
I sit back, wandering and wavering
I’m not quite sure where I am in this plot
But I don’t think it is six feet under
I try my best to listen
But I’m just doing okay
And *** only knows when the **** it’ll be great.

Oh the energy I lack
For all the *******
Four years of this schooling
Four years of that schooling
While barely surviving
What a crock of ****.

I don’t hate it all
It was educational some of the time
But now I leave within a few months
With confusion and fuzzy memories
Of things I never did
And things I never wanted to do

What an American Dream I’m living.
AvengingPoet Jul 2018
I don’t matter
But that’s alright
Just another speck
On this pale blue dot
Filled with infinite content
And I laugh and laugh and be entertained
Christ, is this all there really is?
Does any of this matter?
I don’t matter

I feel drained
Another day
Can’t even focus on the coffee cup
The only thing keeping me going
Is the falseness of this American Dream
Oh man I’m already a debt *****
But I’ll get through it
When I’m 50
I feel drained

But there’s no cause for concern
We wouldn’t wanna upset the status quo
Get a good job pay those debts
Can you breathe yet?
Probably not
No alarms and no surprises
The true American Dream
As you drown in the poison
But there’s no cause for concern

One last time for the people in the back
I’m having a heart attack but I made it to 50
I ate like **** and it’s my time to die
But I got my quiet suburban home
And a wife that I love
And 2 beautiful children
And a job I hate
One last time for the people in the back

Maybe I’m being too cynical
It’s not that bad
There’s tragic flaws surrounding the great US of A
But I’ve gotta be me, I’ve gotta function
Even if I don’t matter
I can breathe and that’s a relief
Maybe I’m just being too cynical...

Does any of this matter?
AvengingPoet Jul 2018
Another morning is at my door
Oh *** not once more
This loneliness is creeping in again
Put a face on today
“How are you”

I’m ******* dying inside.

You keep my breathing
You’re the only reason I don’t blow my brains out
I promise I’m not suicidal
Just having a rough ******* day

I’m not looking for anything in particular
Just for this next week to end
So I can leave this land of the lonely
And get back to where I belong
With the one I love

And oh the fake facades
Put on by all of the human populace
As they go into work once again

*** I hate this all.

I wish life was more kind
I’m in a dead zone
I can’t answer your call
Maybe sometime soon...

Maybe some other time.
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