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Aug 2020 · 76
One
Anya Aug 2020
One
We’ve been stretched over
the horizon of time
Waiting patiently to become
Preparing our souls to be one

I am now
You are tomorrow
We haven’t discovered
each other yet

Disconnected
Searching our understanding

I am your present
You are my gift of hope
There you go
Something in common

At the peak of life we are one
Aug 2020 · 59
Lost
Anya Aug 2020
We are dead
Love is drained from our veins
Hearts of stone feel no more
Eyes empty blind
Seeing just what they like

We used to live
Spark connected our lives together
Each day was a pleasure found new
Every moment had a meaning
We were breathing

In time days gained weight
Unbearable
To heavy to carry
Hard work overtook our love
We were gone

The day we died was quiet
Nothing unusual happened
We woke up in the morning
Didn’t even notice our dead bodies

No heartbeat, no pulse
No blood flowing in our veins
A corpse of a once-living home
What’s left

Who killed us
Did this... to us
Where did we go wrong
We don’t know
All we have are the memories
Lost
Jan 2020 · 35
To those who lost faith
Anya Jan 2020
Takes a breath away
This moment of truth
So honest so painful
Somehow beautiful

To die
Right now
It could be a choice
Unimportant
But yet meaningful

This moment here
Is real

What happens to us
To those who lost faith
Are we now criminals
Do we go straight to hell

How do we go on
How do we play this game
What happens to those
Who lost faith

No matter pleads that we’ve cried
Don’t count prayers no more
What’s important lies ahead of us
What’s ahead is where we belong

Without faith
On our own
Walking the revival road
Searching for the place we call home

There's still hope
Jan 2020 · 61
King of Tears
Anya Jan 2020
Here again
You came
Quickly in the blink of an eye
you disarm my armor without
any resistance
You always know what to do
How to fool me
Now I’m waiting for my sentence
I kneel before you
I can see you pulling out a knife
You will strike
Stabbing my heart
And I will do nothing
Close my eyes and hold my breath
When you’ll be done
you will slowly walk away

I don’t understand

Your infinite cruelty
is making me lose my mind
I’m begging you to stop
but you don’t hear me
You don’t care

I do not understand

But I know what will come next

I know...

Tell me how to understand ?

I am loosing faith...

You broke me
I am in pieces
Like a shattered vase I lie on the ground
When you walk by you strike again and step on my heart
Stomping on it hard
Enough to squeeze out the last drop
of tears
I'm surprised there is some left
The remains
You collect them all and when you
leave you watch closely
searching for flaws

A collector feeding on drops of pain
I stand up
Count the time
before your return

The almighty King of Tears
always hungry for more
Dec 2019 · 84
Overcooked meal
Anya Dec 2019
This conversation is old

I’m drunk now
High on frustration and despair
My mama didn’t warn me it will
turn out like this

Overcooked meal

Tasteless

No pepper, no salt
No spice to go on

Nobody cares

Just expectations to measure up

I will make sure
Wear my best underwear
High heals
Good dress

The look on your face

It will be worth it

Let me serve you

Yeah, it will be something...
Dec 2019 · 99
Mary Jane
Anya Dec 2019
My tank is empty
I am running on low
Mary Jane, please fix me up
Breathe in some fresh air
in my lungs

Mary Jane,
I want to play your game
Darling, you put a spell on me
I need your magic touch
Hit me up with your punch
Let’s fly, together on cloud nine

Mary Jane, you are so *****
Filthy, outrageous, smoking hot
You’re so bad but so good
Honey I love, every inch of you

It’s simple, you are the one
When you come I come
My Sweet Miss Misbehaviour
Give me just one more blow
Baby kiss me until we’re done
Dec 2019 · 94
Dark, dark
Anya Dec 2019
The dark, dark times had come

Their shadow long
Swallowing up us whole
They’re hungry
Starving for more
They’ll take it all

The dark, dark times had come

Sleepless spies
grinning their fangs
Their faces lurking
in the crowd
Ready to bite, eat us alive

The dark, dark times had come

It’s our turn
It's time to hurt
Pour never-ending tears
Fill up the bottomless seas
Give what is left to give


The dark, dark times are here

Don’t let them in...
Nov 2019 · 539
Statue
Anya Nov 2019
So far
Standing on a pedestal
A Monument
A Statue rock hard

Once alive
Now, turned to stone
Too proud to look down
Its eyes closed

Don’t come near
Do not try to touch
You will never reach
its marble heart

Don’t whisper in its ear
your truth
It won’t hear you
It won’t shed a tear
It won't understand

Best to just leave it alone

A beautiful memory
imprinted on your soul
Let it stand there,
far away, on its own

A Statue

Once alive
turned to stone
Nov 2019 · 168
Cry me a river
Anya Nov 2019
Cry me a river little girl
He whispered softly in her ear
Don’t worry it won’t really hurt
You will endure it

Cry me a river, my sweet child
Let me collect your crystal tears
You’ve always been the chosen one
To give me what I need

Cry me a river pure of heart
I want to touch so deep inside
And even if you’re torn apart
I will not stop

Cry me a river little one
I have my plan to follow up
You’ll understand it in your time
Now, let me work.
Nov 2019 · 129
Auschwitz
Anya Nov 2019
Snap! Perfect selfie
A tick on the bucket list
Another holiday memory
from a trip,
 
to Auschwitz...
 
There are flowers here in Auschwitz
Growing on the blood-soaked ground
 
A flower number 55 is red
Like the blood that had been shed
 
A flower number 129 smells like gas
Like the chambers that took lives
 
A flower number 3 078 smells like pain
Endured, in a torture every day
  
A flower number 20 503 smells like fear
Of living and dying in agony  
 
A flower number 400 076
is too weak to smell like anything

There are 1 300 000 flowers in Auschwitz
Growing on the blood-soaked ground
 
But who will remember that...
Nov 2019 · 114
Old Barbie
Anya Nov 2019
Old Barbie looks in the mirror
Terrified with what she sees
The reflection shows her a stranger
Someone she doesn’t want to be

Her face is old and wrinkled
Her hair turned thin and grey
Her body used to be perfect
Now weak and out of shape

Old Barbie covers her face
Trying to hide from despair
But she can’t stop what she feels
On artificial cheeks real warm tears...
Nov 2019 · 1.3k
We still have time
Anya Nov 2019
There is still time
To have breakfast in bed
after we woke up
There is time to talk
Slowly
Carefully
Picking words which don’t hurt
We can still hold hands
Gaze into each other’s eyes
Be kind
Be nice
We still have time to laugh
Watch each other smiles
And be amazed
Everyday

It is not too late
Nov 2019 · 97
Empty
Anya Nov 2019
I keep on searching
But my pocket is empty
There’s a hole at the bottom

What a mess

Words all over the floor
Letters spilled in the kitchen sink
Thoughts in the bathtub playing
hide and seek

Nothing left

Today I won’t write anything

I need words to soothe my soul
Nurture my heart
Heal my wounds

I want to write to thank you

Soon

I’ll try again

But, not today
Oct 2019 · 102
Bang, bang
Anya Oct 2019
Hello Big Shot you killed again
The bullet hit right in the center
The rush feels good
You know it well
You’re holding hands with
the danger

Don’t play with the fire
mama said
But blood addicts once
you taste it
Now all you want is ******
and death
Saving lives isn’t on your agenda

You built an Empire with big guns
Shooting whoever tries to touch you
A mighty King wearing a crown
Sitting on the Golden Throne

Bang, bang goes another round
Bang, bang all you can hear
Bang, bang echoing in your mind
Bang, bang…………….
Sep 2019 · 381
4th Floor
Anya Sep 2019
It’s hot today
People play artificial games
Sunbathing in the plastic Sun
The screen is melting
as they click along

Everyone’s thirsty
They can't quench their thirst
despite drinking
All they want is more and more
What are the needing

And somewhere down the road
It’s raining on the 4tn floor
The water flows down the windows
The river floats through the door

There’s a pond in the middle
of the kitchen
And the water is calm
Nobody’s thirsty here

We’ve got all we need
Sep 2019 · 106
rose
Anya Sep 2019
a sad rose
in the orphanage

waits to be adopted
for many lonely years

nobody wants her

people prefer
flowers with no thorns...
Sep 2019 · 90
Invitation
Anya Sep 2019
It came in the post
In a pink envelope

Who would’ve thought...

It said; You’re invited to a party
You are the main meal
so
wear nothing
It will be worth it

It starts at midnight
In the underground bar
Called “Hell”
Remember, come naked

Oh, temptation
To be in the centre of attention
Wanted, desired

I went
And never returned the same

In pieces, blooded and bitten
Torn apart

Got what I needed to
grow up...
Sep 2019 · 99
Someone
Anya Sep 2019
In the middle of nowhere
On a non-existent chair
Sat down a nobody
It feels boring he said
There is nothing to do
Nothing to read
Nothing to write
What shall I do in this no-land
He looked upon
He looked beyond
Nothing he saw
He was really terribly bored
I will try something he thought
I will be someone I am not
And that is how Someone was born
Aug 2019 · 102
Don’t
Anya Aug 2019
Oh no, don’t
Don’t tell me to go
Don’t tell me to leave you alone

Don’t tell me I’m to messed up
to fit in your world
I might not be what you think
I’m not one of the dolls you saw on tv
I’m so much more
Flesh and blood

Dont tell me to shut up
To change my mind
To stop
I will not

Don’t

Don’t tell me to do my hair
Change my clothes
Fix my attitude

I am a burning piece of art

Don’t even start

Don’t tell me what you’d like me to be

Let me be me

Just close your mouth and
listen
Aug 2019 · 125
Prince
Anya Aug 2019
You came like a storm
on a bare white horse
A Prince of the Kingdom
beyond the Earth
Your eyes lightnings and thunder
Long sparkling coat on your
shoulders

Your boots walked many roads
Victorious
Your sword fought great battles
A warrior
Your hands strong and gentle
Your heart tough and tender

You spoke and the World listened
You smiled and the fireworks danced
When you wept waters dried up
and heavens became sad
You touched the Universe when
you came

And the Stars remember your name
Jul 2019 · 793
Blood
Anya Jul 2019
Hush now
It’s all right
You will forget
The taste of my blood

It was funny when
you took a bite
I knew you will choke
on my poisoned heart

My vein is still pulsing
I can feel your teeth
piercing through my skin

Look, now our blood is mixed
A creation of a new disease

Hush now, don’t cry
You will forget the pain
in time

Just close your eyes
and count to five

Now, you are mine
Jul 2019 · 104
Vodka
Anya Jul 2019
Straight from hell
Brewed by
the devil himself
Fiery liquid of
entertainment
Easily deceiving
Difficult to get rid of
Medicine
for the pain of the soul
But be careful
Stay cautious
It’s a poison for your brain
Many have fallen
lost to its power
The best one
Made in Poland
...they say
Jul 2019 · 171
Bubble
Anya Jul 2019
It’s comfortable here
In this place without windows
Safe and warm

Away from the demons
grinning their fangs
From the eyes of sleepless spies

Watching every move
Wishing for the nightmare
to come true

Don’t pull
Do not grab my hand
Don’t tell me to get out there

Let me stay here, blind and deaf
I don’t want to heal
Don’t pray for a miracle

I want to be ill
This needle you are holding will **** me
You can’t help me

Let me shut down
Levitate in my bubble
Far, far away into space...
Jul 2019 · 142
Tommy
Anya Jul 2019
It was summer, when Tommy died
Peacefull, warm, the smell of woods in the air
A stream flowed through the meadow into a pond;
This was a place where dreams come true.
On that day friends found the place
Enjoyed the freedom of water:
Tommy, Lilly, Cassy, John
The day when Tommy died
It was a Friday
So much remembered
Tommy, Lilly, Cassy, John
Drove to the woods, the meadow, the pond
The Sun played silver tricks with the surface with its invitation to water,
Where Tommy vanished, disappeared, taking The Sun with him.
So much was lost that summers’ day
So much changed since Tommy went away.
Jul 2019 · 100
Raindrops
Anya Jul 2019
Quick quick
Let’s open all the curtains
Let the sunshine in
Wipe the tears
from our cheeks
Dust the casket with
hope in it
Let it play music again

Quick quick
Lets open up all doors
Let the wind flow
Bring fresh dreams
on its wings
Chase away all fears

Quick quick
Lets open our eyes
closed so long ago
See for the first time
our flaws
Kiss each one with
brand new love

Quick quick
Lets open our hearts
Break free from chains
holding us back
Lets go naked outside
Feel the raindrops
one more time…
Jul 2019 · 115
Red Rose
Anya Jul 2019
I found a rose by the front door
in the morning
Laying there on the porch
Waiting for me to pick it up
The most beautiful red rose
I have ever seen
The colour intense and deep
I got it up and felt gentle,
velvet petals
So sensual to touch
Smelled the flower’s amazing smell
Just perfect

No note…

Who can be my generous
benefactor
Maybe the handsome guy
living next door
Or some mysterious admirer
A thought of it stroked my ego
with pleasure

But, wait a minute…

Maybe someone lost it
Or threw it away like unwanted
*******
Maybe it's just a mistake
I looked at the rose again
Not so beautiful any more
The smell, not amazing
like before
And the colour a bit pale

Suddenly I saw all thorns...

Maybe it was my enemy
Dropped the bloom on purpose
Yes, it must have been that
stupid neighbour lady
She planted the flower here
and now she laughs sneeringly
I'll throw it away
to show her I don’t care

Stupid ****,
in the morning bothering me...
Jul 2019 · 160
Bottom
Anya Jul 2019
It’s
so quiet
Lonely
Miles apart
from the surface
Drowning in herself
Still alive but dead

Cold
So cold

Sinking to the bottom

Held by
the invisible chains
Gasping for air
but breathing something else
She knows what comes next
Another night in the turbid
depths of a nightmare
On her own
All alone
In the darkness

What’s happened to her
She was soaring so high,
but fell so low...

Is there a way out

Which way to go
from the bottom...
Jul 2019 · 93
Caravel
Anya Jul 2019
The caravel is sailing today
Bored with the shore
Takes the course of a new
challenge
Setting the compass on
nautical adventure

The land left behind
watches with sadness
Sees the sails set high
Hears the excitement
of preparations

It doesn’t want to break up
But understands
The caravel is made
to navigate the sea,
to search unwaveringly
for new islands on the horizon

Such is its nature
To be free in the element
of wind and water
Go through storms
Dance with lightnings
Play with dolphins in the waves

The land knows very well

That at the end of the journey
The caravel will return
A prodigal son
Coming back home
Jul 2019 · 154
Dog
Anya Jul 2019
Dog
I can withstand a collar,
that hurts when you pull
I can bear a hard bed
And no water to drink

I will bark if you order
And I will protect you
I’ll wait, as long as it takes
Until your return

I will take a tell off
Even if, I don’t deserve it
I don’t mind frozen paws
I don’t care, if I’ll get hungry

I will always love you
And I’ll be forever loyal
Till the end, by your side
My beloved human
A true friend leaves paw prints on your heart.
Jul 2019 · 110
Art of Poetry
Anya Jul 2019
Here we are discovering
the art of poetry...

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
words attached with
each other
Connected together
to start a chain reaction
Step by step taking
the reader higher
Into the unblemished
skies of imagination
Everything’s allowed ;
to laugh, cry,
be happy and sad
A feast for senses
A question without
an answer
An emotion lingering
in the right place
and moment

Here he is
The poet
armed with a pen
His eyes open
Mind focused
Feelings on a leash
Pulling forcefully
Forward, backwards
Hold on Mr Poet!
Stay strong, don’t let go!
Lead...

Take it
where you want it to be
Let it breathe
in the alley of mystery
Drink and feed
on a secret
Allow the reader
to discover for himself

Lay it to rest in the place
of destination
The poem
A riddle to solve
Your creation...
Jun 2019 · 139
Skeleton
Anya Jun 2019
The silence of a dead home
is always loud
Cries are heard in every corner
Tears pour out from the taps
Shadows lurk in the dark

Life is gone
Every drop squeezed
from a sponge into a sewage
What’s left is a skeleton
Naked ribs and bones
sticking from dead walls

At the centre there used to be
heart
Strong and hopeful beating
in the rhythm of the future
Holding tightly your little hand
But... it slipped away

Heaven had a different plan
Couldn’t wait and took you back
In one second everything ended
Evaporated into space like it
never existed

Leaving behind a dying home
Starved from love and denied life
Without a chance of survival
With the memory of your sweet
name on its last breath...
Jun 2019 · 406
Do it!
Anya Jun 2019
It’s time for a ******
A perfect crime committed
in cold blood
Cooled down a long time ago
Solidified and black

Aroused razor sharp
grins with its beguiling
seductive smile
Ready for the ****** cut

Deadly poison winks
with its rotten eye
Inviting for a toxic drink

A gun shoots right in the
center of attention
Promising quick exit

Thick rope hangs
sadly from a tree
Begging for this
one and only kiss

Waiting

For you and your move

Do it!
Before it’s to late
Before someone else
will do it to you

**** what is already dead
in the world deprived of
feelings
Where love suffocates
without air
Truth declined moves out
Warmth freezes
And faith defeated leaves

In this world so cynical,
ruthless and cruel

Do it now!

****** your heart..
Jun 2019 · 83
Love me
Anya Jun 2019
The Sun is shining
The day is beautiful
Today, i will meet your
expectations

i’ll be, who you want me to be
Do, whatever you desire
i can do it
Just have to work harder

i know
i haven’t been perfect
Far from it...
But i can do better
i promise

i’ll put more effort
Be smarter, exciting, bright
Say the right thing, at the right time
Look my best, just as you like

You’ve been waiting,
so patiently for so long
i am grateful for every minute
you wasted on me
Being useless and weak

Today i will meet your expectations
Like you deserve
And maybe then you will love me

i hope…
Jun 2019 · 65
Wake up call
Anya Jun 2019
It didn’t happen in the morning
Wasn’t a start of a jolly day
It happened in the middle of
the night and left me in tears,
confusion and pain
Showed me the hard way
that I need to open my eyes
See things for real, the way
they are

I woke up

Dizzy with a headache
And then a funny thing happened
I didn’t feel broken
I felt ready for another chapter,
of my story
And let me tell you something
my darling
You can’t break me
I am actually grateful that you
woke me
You only made me stronger
on my journey
Thank you for a close call
But tomorrow I will go on
whether you like it or not.
Jun 2019 · 192
Room
Anya Jun 2019
The air is hot in here
Heavy
Filled with the smell of sin
The clock tick-tocks
in the dark
Measuring time
Registering every second of pain
Old carpet, stained with blood
Hiding ***** secrets, those which
doesn't want to be found out
Broken bed,
nailed by the weight of all the screams
it heard
Restless

Windows closed… long time ago

Evil monster in the closet
The one which never sleeps
He comes out at night to eat
Devour innocence
Tear it apart to pieces
Too pure to escape
Too sweet to get away
On the table the Bible
On the wall the Holy Cross
Above the door invitation;
„Come, in the name of Love”.
Jun 2019 · 82
New Man
Anya Jun 2019
He lost himself somewhere
Took the wrong turn in
the labyrinth of life
And now a part of him
is left behind

He doesn’t know where to look
Not sure if he even should
Is it important
The lost piece of him
must be broken

Maybe he could grow it back
But should he even try
Shall he simply accept the fact
of not being full anymore
Is it so wrong to be spoiled

Who cares
It’s just one piece
He doesn’t even know what it is
He can still be happy without it
Probably

It feels different though
He’s changed now
Strangely numb
He doesn’t feel much anymore
Not like before

Only when it gets dark
he feels like he wants to cry
Mourn the piece that’s gone
Cause deep inside he knows
he’ll never be the same again

A new man
Jun 2019 · 117
If
Anya Jun 2019
If
If you will leave

Time will stop in shock
The World will collapse in despair
Stars sad will switch off
And the Sun
will simply burn away
Life will die
Lay, in the dark grave,
and close its eyes forever
Nothing will become
And even it will cry real tears,
cause it will never see
your face

If you will stay

Time will flow, steady and calm
The World will beam with joy
Stars will shine dancing in the sky
And the Sun will glow forever
Life will be born, brand new,
full of hope
It will smile at the thought
that we share it
Emptiness will fill up on
happiness and love
All of this, just for you,
cause
you’re staying!
Jun 2019 · 100
Letter
Anya Jun 2019
A piece of paper
Creased, yellow, old
Nothing special 
but so much more
 
On it, words holding 
a key to a secret
An answer to unsolved mystery 
A missing puzzle of a story
poured onto the paper
Each sentence, paragraph 
so important 
 
Memories, planted long time ago
Growing roots strong and raw 
Locked in a special room 
with doors tightly closed 
 
Thoughts  
Desperately wanting to be heard
Sacred, forbidden 
Untouched 
 
A confession in the envelope 
Sealed and hidden
Never sent, but written
for a reason
 
Now in the drawer
Waiting
Locked behind in
the cupboard of memories
Kept away in the prison
of the dark
 
Just a letter, a paper
Simple
But so much more...
Jun 2019 · 149
Revenge
Anya Jun 2019
He gave her a rose
Then slowly ripped the petals
She sharpens the thorns...
Jun 2019 · 84
Smile
Anya Jun 2019
My darling smile
Where did you hide
It’s been so long since
I’ve seen you last time

Your place is here
You belong with me
I’m calling for you
Can you hear me

I need your sparkle
back in my heart
I’ve lost you somewhere
in the dark

I want you to know,
that I’m searching for you
Above and beyond
my grey, sad world

The maze I am in,
is hard to get through
But don’t you worry
I’ll find you

Last time I saw you
on the wings of the butterfly,
in the breeze of the wind,
waves of an ocean

Wherever you are
It won’t be long
I’ll keep my faith
You’ll come back home...
May 2019 · 88
Perfect Man
Anya May 2019
Yesterday you looked at me
Just for a second
I was so happy that you gave me
scraps of your attention

That moment was so special
A second of your life
gave me so much
So many dreams at night

You probably laugh right now
Have fun
Somewhere in the Promise Land
where you belong

I know how important you are
I understand
You reached the summit of
Mount Everest

I look up to you
You’ve taught me so much
By simply being who you are
A perfect man

I was so happy yesterday
When you looked at me
For the whole second
Even if, you didn’t see me...
May 2019 · 111
black heart
Anya May 2019
the black heart of stone
pumps black blood into
the blackened veins
tireless day after day

it used to be fiery red
innocent
felt feelings deeply
knew love very well

now transformed
doesn’t want to feel
anything anymore
fills up only on hate

it changed a long time ago
hurt too many times
lost hope
forever petrified

beats in strong rhythm
listening to the whispers
of black shadows
evil spirits from the past
pouring hate into the heart

black heart listens
remembers well
works hard determined
to never get hurt again
May 2019 · 69
String
Anya May 2019
I’m not playing
Rang the string quietly
I'm tired
Fed up with strumming
over and over the same
old melody
I want to be free!
Hear something new
Travel the musical world
Meet fresh, exciting tones
Play something special
Feel inspired!
Fly up to the sky with sopranos
Fall down and dive into bass
Swim with the notes
I never dreamed of
Enchanted by sounds
lose my head
And fall crazy in love
with music again!
May 2019 · 97
Jimmy
Anya May 2019
Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy boy

You are a darling
Mama’s pride and joy
So what you’re grown, you
don’t work, don’t have a girl
Mama loves you and you love her

You live with your mama
On the second floor
You’ve got a room
all on your own
Mama’s there with you
sleeping right next door

She takes care of you
like you deserve
Always doing whatever
you want
Mama knows your needs
like no one in the world

Nobody can replace your mama
No other girl can be like her
Whatever she does
to earn your love
It will never be enough

Don’t ever forget
your mama’s love
You’ll always be mama’s boy
Remember that Jimmy
When your mama’s gone

And you, are all alone…
May 2019 · 104
Ode to Inspiration
Anya May 2019
Oh Mother!
Of all creation
Wild and unbridled Inspiration
Reveal yourself to me
Open my mind to see

I’ll be your faithful servant
Accept me in your chamber
Fill me up with passion,
feed me with desire
Charm me with your magic
Hypnotize me with your power
I give myself to you...
Willingly, completely

Oh Mother!
Guide me to the place
Where beautiful minds play games
Sow their seeds, to grow trees of words
I am longing, to be one of those souls

Oh Mother!
Grace me with that gift
Unleash it into me
Posses me with your spirit
Arm me with sword of poetry
Teach me to think in ink

Oh Mother!
Before You,
In here I humbly kneel
I oath to You today
I’ll use, your great gift well
With hope, I shall not fail.
May 2019 · 449
Cemetery of Dreams
Anya May 2019
It's time for sleep
Paralysis of the senses
Eyes shut don’t want to see
Ears closed refuse to hear
anything

Misty tomorrow will come drunk
Sleepwalking among the shadows
There is no me, no you, no us
There is no more

What remains is time
Ticking in the silence of the night
Slowly counting ends
Watching The End nearing by

There are no more beginnings
Buried there on the cemetery of dreams
In the land of hopelessness
Buried deep

So many tombstones
Nobody remembers anymore
Rest in peace never born
Embryos of hope killed in the womb

Now what counts is sleep
Let it come
Numb the pain
Closed eyes and closed ears
Keeping away from living

There is only one left
The stubborn heart
Still open
Still looking for a dream to be born
Stupid
May 2019 · 89
Don’t Speak
Anya May 2019
"It takes two years to learn to speak,
and all life to learn when to be quiet "
-Ernest Hemingway-


Shhhhh...
Don’t say a thing

We don’t need to talk right now
A single whisper will be too much
It’s time to end this altercation,
we’ve got be careful

Let’s put this fight away
Our tongues are so sharp
today
Stabbing open wounds
with two-edged sword,
over and over again

Don’t underestimate the power
Words can be hotter than fire
So easy to hurt with just one
of them
The damage done, so great

We know how to speak, shout,
scream
Words like bullets hit the target
perfectly
But to stay quiet... challenging

Close your eyes and count to ten
Shut down what you want to say
Now it’s time to let go of anger
driving frantically our temper

Let’s put our egos down to sleep
Sing sweet lullaby
Tomorrow we’ll look at the world
with brand new eyes

In the morning the storm will
be gone
Let the silence work
its magic touch
Untangling our feelings
and clearing up our thoughts


Stop, just say no more.
May 2019 · 89
Hunger
Anya May 2019
There it is
Consuming on me
Taking ****** bites
Eating me alive

I’ve tried so hard to feed it
Gave it whatever it wanted
But it’s never satisfied
Forever hungry

I’ve been searching
Praying for answers
But the hunger doesn’t stop
Never leaves my heart

It always wants more
of Something
To fill up the hole
that’s empty

Hidden deep inside
it never sleeps
Doesn’t close its eyes
Ready to eat

What does it need
I don’t know
This ravenous hunger
of my heart…
May 2019 · 137
Gone...
Anya May 2019
The playroom is locked
A shadow plays with the toys
The children are gone...
May 2019 · 188
Drawer
Anya May 2019
Open me, please
Let me unravel my content
Layer by layer, please strip
me naked

Prepare yourself, be careful
There are lots of sharp
objects in here
Ready to strike, out of fear

Stay calm
Open me slow
Disarm all the pins and needles
Put away the scissors

Gently handle the knives
and razors
Give it time, don’t rush
Be cautious

I don’t want to hurt you
Push you away
Sometimes I act in self defense
Please understand

Don’t stop
Dig deep, to the bottom
Be patient
Please, find my secret...
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