You're at it again
You once again carving patterns into stones
You don't leave non Unturned
You toss them through the water creating beautiful ripples that sinks to the bottom of the lake.
And you say you don't ever regret any of those mistakes.
But I regret you
I regret letting you grab onto my body
I regret letting you toss me about
I regret letting you dust the dirt off me
I regret letting you cut into me carving pain into my skin
I regret every inch.
I spoke to you last night.
It was the first time since last time.
Underneath the night sky’s tinted window,
Watching and waiting for the last cloud to escape from underneath the moon.
Can you see me sitting here?
With my face buried in my hands
And sorrow stained on my paper skin?
Show me a sign that you are there.
I asked for a sign to ease my mind.
I guess you heard it.
Maybe that is why the moon is so bright
And following me everywhere I go.
You have your eye on me.
The night was warm like the tea you made
But inviting like the last hug you gave me.
Calm night for a damaged soul.
Grant me serenity,
Show me you are there.
I miss you.
If you could read my mind
You won't want to hear me out
If you could hear me out, you'll be speechless.
If you could read my mind
You would drown listening to the rhythm of my tears
-dont ask what I'm thinking about.
He spoke about marriage like i was never part of the plan
He spoke of a wedding I would dreadfully be attending
He spoke about a wife that will hold him at night as i lay alone with my regrets.
He spoke of a person standing next to him as if i haven't fought for the love he neglects
He spoke about happiness like I've never tried to paint a smile on the canvas
He spoke of laughs he would share with a soul that wasn't mine.
He spoke about a life...i was no longer a part of.
He spoke of everything I've feard and suddenly i see them in reality
i treasure my old books,
especially the one on my bedside.
It holds a memorable romance
that i look forward to reading at night
sometimes i study each word looking for a deeper meaning
i slip on my glasses trying to get cosy in a silk blanket seaming at whats left .
sometimes i read into each syllable searching for more depth
i come across a few pages through which blood and tears crept
sometimes i find myself thinking about the end
i toss and turn in my bed deciding on turning to the last page
sometimes my mind wanders off to a new story about a kiss between best friends
i beat myself up- hoping my book took no offence
sometimes my book doesn't like the attention
sometimes i wish i could crack open another spine
sometimes i crave a new book
a book that shows me constellations with a naked eye
an eye that's the key to the lock
the lock that's attached to the rib-cage he allowed me to crack
a crack that led me to to his heart.
a heart that finally had my name
as the title.