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Jun 2018 · 110
AmbientThought Jun 2018
I don't sleep at night for thoughts of you and what I'll do.
Dreaming a life of fright seemingly only subdued
by intoxicants, though with them my life is can'ts,
my words, rants
on a staggered stance;
No clear path through.
Intentions misconstrued
Me and myself collude  
to ruin an attitude
******. Still I feud
with myself and me
to separate what's glued,
but as wood breaks first
on what's naturally fused,
I crack first
where the aforementioned has affused
unto me a link weak and loose.
If I could I'd choose,
but know there to be no use.
Jun 2018 · 102
6 foot 5 inches
AmbientThought Jun 2018
A branch
6 foot 5 inches from 8 perpendicular wraps
sat beneath the left jaws angle to ensure a clean snap.  
Up, right, and back.
Never a plan so mapped
nor a mind so cracked.
then 15 minutes max.
Dark times
May 2018 · 107
Muddled Intentions
AmbientThought May 2018
I thought I'd aptly be recluse.

As if I could flee this ruse,

and, in me, find a use,

but alone I seek my muse,

a friend I knew I'd lose.

Once acute but now obtuse,

my acceptance, but I don't confuse

my penance with a noose,

as there's good still I can do,

to impress this goddess; You.

A greatness to show through

the darkness I've abused

to shroud me from abuse

to change this shade of blue

to an optimistic hue,

and in that new light brew

a life to entice You,

and find, even in our tempered state,

a way to start anew.

Though, I'd not change the line you drew,

in dreams I'd bond our one from two.

I'll hope always for a dream come true,

but I'd not gain mine at a loss to you,

as I see your dreams more deserved and due.
Sep 2017 · 123
AmbientThought Sep 2017
Aug 2017 · 132
Too High to Haiku
AmbientThought Aug 2017
I'll be lost when found
Squandering time from lost mind
With what fun I find
Aug 2017 · 196
Serotonin smile
AmbientThought Aug 2017
Surface stimuli spreads a serotonin smile across her face,
but the Half-Life's less than half the life she wades in space.
Knows she should quicken pace through times of disgrace,
Though often feels displaced, rewound to start of race.
How's one to continue when all progress is erased?
So many demons faced, and more still to take their place.
She just trecks on through space
Pulls tight shoes' lace,
A race to erase disgrace,
Makes haste to displace
Any demons she'll face,
And on her own, a smile place.
Aug 2017 · 133
To know or not to know
AmbientThought Aug 2017
All I know is that I don't know?
Through the logic loop we go..
I don't know?
But know you don't..
I know one thing. That's it.
Best yet, but I still won't sit.
Jun 2017 · 119
Eyes away
AmbientThought Jun 2017
Separate many a week
Long missed embrace I seek
Stomach twists, feeling weak
As face turns, collision with cheek
Eyes away, now thoughts grow bleak
Effect assumed, cause unknown
Lowered me easy, still I was thrown
Your voice made me queasy, and touch felt of stone
It could never be easy, something now that's well known.
Jun 2017 · 297
A literate
AmbientThought Jun 2017
A literate in a little nation
Likes to play with literation
And can add alliteration
To send along a fun sensation
And maybe make you misspeak ration?
Jun 2017 · 147
Regulate Repetition
AmbientThought Jun 2017
Unsettled understanding, perhaps paranoid
Oculars overacting​, ​should vision be void?
Are thoughts toyed, or distracted destructively?
Slide this sinusoid to come back constructively​.
Away it's easier to see.  
When near you know no need.
Stay thine hand from Mead,
and mind from greed
As only fulfilled neuron fires repeat
AmbientThought Jun 2017
How would we have known we would wash away?
As two solemn searching souls, together to the sea
Amongst the creatures underneath the deepening
Holding to the flame burning you and me

We sacrifice the talk and praise the eyes in all wonder and amazement
And notice every star floating in the arms of symmetry so ageless
This is not mine. It is a clip of lyrics from Chuck Ragan's song "Symmetry" of the album "Feast or Famine." I thought others here might enjoy it as I do.(Google him if you like this, as he's quite poetic in many songs)
Jun 2017 · 402
More or less?
AmbientThought Jun 2017
Beware, to be weary
is to be unaware
Blank stare, eyes see clearly
but no thought is there
Shelled form,
I'm torn, these absent of mind
were one day born.
Forlorn, but is it they or me
who feel its thorn?
May 2017 · 109
AmbientThought May 2017
The whispering eye speaks only a ***** fable
May 2017 · 166
AmbientThought May 2017
The whispering eye speaks only a ***** fable
May 2017 · 143
AmbientThought May 2017
These great beings
adhere air to earth,
Draw fire and water
To nurture our birth,
Rebreath as we breath,
Furnish home, and warm hearth,
Hold histories and mysteries
Still roots we unearth.
We great unseeing.
May 2017 · 130
AmbientThought May 2017
I find solace in the meaningless
Best held close to limit stress
So much inside the meaningless
For to be nothing is to be everything
To fear no fate of terrible or great
But what then is this emotion
Alluding to the notion
That to keep oneself in motion
We must display more love less hate
For to be seething is to be blinding
So much inside the meaningless
Best defined free from duress
I find solace in the meaningless
May 2017 · 194
AmbientThought May 2017
Concieved perceptions
Perceive conceptions,
But where sits inception,
As child's conception's
Defined: "pregnancies inception,"
But what worth's that definition?!
Dazed by repetition, losing ambition.
Where sits inception?
May 2017 · 142
AmbientThought May 2017
If sins of the father are sins of the son,
and new sins are born with each days sun.
After so many cycles,  what'd you think we'd become?
May 2017 · 158
Cascading Thought
AmbientThought May 2017
Feeling lost from light,
while some lack sight.
Claim cogency ironically,
then cower from fight.
Is this might,
this fear of strife?
25, handsome, bright,
and still yearning for knife?!
Deserving of life?
May 2017 · 124
AmbientThought May 2017
As diminishing as time, structural integrity of life line, I know I'll get there either way, but I'd like to sense this world a few more days. Or maybe more if I believe these words, and if it's all just senses how are any obsurde. Trying to view the world through other's eyes has left me sunken low and worse yet blind. So I guess it's best to be alone, if to these things you find you're prone. These decaying bar-like walls that we call home just keep a man and mind unfree to roam. But one day I'll break away from this grey cage, and in this aging book, write a new page. I was a fool to think it all so linear, shouted answers fall on broken ears. Just posing questions refusing to hear, it seems I've become my greatest fear. And as it diminishes with time, structural integrity of my mind. I accept that I'll get there either way, but I'd like to sense this world a few more days.
Lyrics I wrote a few years back.
May 2017 · 185
f (t) = sin(t)
AmbientThought May 2017
So sickeningly sinusoidal
Start subtle simmer
Then brought to boil
Drop down ******
Hid from helping hand
Bastardized brain
Beguilingly​ inane
Different definition
As all's a supposition
Strengthening stand
Contained. In command
Now tower over toil
Sad synapses spark dimmer
So surreally sinusoidal
May 2017 · 176
AmbientThought May 2017
We can't find a way away
It's seems that we are all all but done
We'll wait you and I and die
May 2017 · 194
AmbientThought May 2017
only apparent
actions to face value eyes
but it's Obvious
lacking any obvious principle of organization
May 2017 · 158
AmbientThought May 2017
Self subjection to deeds I despise.
All things above me.., enraged I realize.
Silent screams emanating from eyes
allude to actions, incipient, though still trapped inside..,
so hindering I hide, in rear of reddened eyes,
submerged in amber-old, and deafened by my lies.
May 2017 · 182
AmbientThought May 2017
All the greetings​ received from day to day,
from hellos and head nods to smiling bright heys.
For me all are awkward and fraught  with dismay,
not from meanings of word, but which ones​ walk away
May 2017 · 161
AmbientThought May 2017
Knowing the darkness I hide,
I wonder what light's are a lie.
Mouthing echoed sounds of pride
trailed soft to mute sigh.
Is this to be, to be abject aware,
or a dawning to oneself
of blinders to narrow stare

— The End —