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Ali 1d
death beckons
and i long
for sweet release
from dreary song

old friend
or friendly foe
merciful end
i want to go

death is memory
not unkown
merely forgotten
as we've grown

looking back
looking ahead
mirror image
t'was always dead

universe
one song
eternal curse
to go on and on

ringing round
in my head
no escape
wish i was dead
Ali Nov 2021
why is it so easy
to break beautiful things?
to **** a bird in seconds
that took millennia to sing

i cradled that glass
i held on for dear life
and all in an instant
it slipped before my eyes

broken glass on the floor
funny how the shards sparkle
only boasting their magic
after their downfall

can't handle much more
this feeling is awful
every moment so tragic
can't get enough though

your heart and mine
evolving from nothing
since the beginning of time
shattered in seconds
cause I said the wrong line

it's funny how fragile
god made beautiful things
it's pretty ******* tragic
some birds never learn to sing
Ali May 2021
i'm still here
things are still, here
everything has changed
but the pain is the same

the air is stale
habits beyond the pale
never seem to get it right
always doomed to fail

stuck in the stillness
****** by the illness
does god hate me?
or is it myself that did this?
Ali May 2021
doom and gloom
no hope for the future

mother nature is dead
i didn't mean to shoot her

dead men walking on borrowed time
there ain't no reason but plenty rhyme

debts will be paid
for our crimes

whether we're sitting on billions
or nickels and dimes
Ali Jan 2020
another day another mistake
these bad habits I can't seem to break
it's as if they posses a mind of their own
my will wavers whichever way the wind is blown

indulge in excess
time and time again
I repeat the process
repent then sin

rinse and repeat
the guilt consumes me
I never seem to learn
at least not fully

even when I spend months on end
sober and free and conscious again
the cycles always draw me near
like a siren's song I can't unhear

I return to hell to make my bed
and as I lay in it - soul half dead
I come to terms with the fact
that this was my consciously chosen path
Ali Oct 2019
one day i took lsd
my famished soul drank all it could see
i sought answers, maybe god
but horror upon horror was all i got

i woke up to the realization that
i was responsible for everything bad
guilt and pain and fear consumed me
beaten down by my ego's contumely

the mind is truly a wicked place
it can twist your world, contort your face
staring down the devil, the reflection in his eyes
gives away the mirror upon which his visage relies

t'was myself i feared the most
the ephemeral glimpse of a lurking ghost
the screams from hell echoing near
but they existed nowhere beyond my ear
Ali Oct 2019
feelings of hopelessness and thoughts of suicide
flood into my consciousness
an unrelenting torrent of dread fills every crevice
of the dark hollow cavern that is my mind

there is no way out
every direction i look turns into a dead end
king midas of death, my mind is my bed
made it up and now i lie in it

every path leads nowhere good
two paths diverged in a dreary wood
and i took neither, frozen in place
waiting for the inevitable

thoughts of hope
haha just kidding...
...unless?
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