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Ahmad Attr May 5
I was rummaging through my black backpack
You kept coughing and coughing
So tense, I almost had a heart-attack
The moon’s light shone through silver clouds outside
It was pitch black except dozens of phones lights inside
With boys, glued to their shining screens
And I was the only one by your bed-sheet
Your fever, it was burning through me
And I was brewing potions on the ground
Pills and syrups to get you all sound
Remember when I carried you through the dorms
Signed application, next day you were gone
See I prayed, See I cared
Even though you don’t even recall I was there

I was sitting in your bed
With arm that still bled
Bruised through the road
Survived an accident
But you were glued to your phone
Oh the things you could’ve said
The jokes you could’ve made about why I wasn’t dead
Your selfishness is incorrigible
That anybody else is intolerable
You knew I was hurt, so much that day
You could’ve asked if was okay
You could’ve offered me a band aid
See I pray, See I care
Even though you don’t even care if I’m really there
i swear to ******* god if i get another 502 bad gateway error !!!!!! this is why i shifted over to allpoetry because i can't upload my poetry here.
Anyways here's another try
Ahmad Attr Mar 11
The first day he created your spotless face
Superlative skull
Beautiful mud
Golden white skin
With charcoal hair
Smooth lips like flesh of a strawberry
Walnut wood eyes
Oh God such a sight!

The second day, he created your body
Like from the finest marble
Spotless, flawless
The subtle bones underneath the soft skin
Sultry ravine
Undulating
A polished glass

The third day, he created your hands
Warm and strong
Confident like you
Curious
Irresistibly addictive
Rough like paper’s skin
Slowly reaching in

The fourth day, he created your voice
Commanding attention
Heavy but sweet
Inspiring, dreamy
Poet-making
Everlasting, sonorous
Echoing round and round
Oh God such a sound!

The fifth day, he created your smile
Gleaming
Like morning’s first light
Alluring
Like winter’s first dusk
Stretching your lips
Softening your eyes
Teeth remain veiled
Just the perfection prevails

The sixth day, he created your fate
He gave you everything I wanted
Power in your name
life an easy game
lovers, worshippers
he made you, the light
a passionate fire
fair boons, it’s unfair

but the seventh day, he created your soul
an accursed day
soul so ashen grey
your body became narcissus’s grave
you had so much love to give
but all you do is take
mirror kisser
swaying alone in the blue moonlight
singing to yourself in the rain
petulantly vain
Oh God such a shame!
Ahmad Attr Feb 27
The lake of millions of scales
Slippery and silvery
The scales click as we dash on them
scurrying on, latched on to your shirt
I trip to my knees
But you prance and dance on
To the shore of red shells
So many of them, like smouldering fire
The crispy crumbles crinkle underneath your feet
I run on my fours, panicking
You keep on moving steadily
Leaving me
Until you have to leap on the carapaces
And you miss a step and fall on your back
And I move, cutting through the air
To your rescue
Treat you, heal you, feel you getting better
Then we both continue to escape the ocean together

But you are so much better at running away than me
I couldn’t tread no more with my numb blistered feet
Blinded by the lights you make it to the city
You’ll make your way to the mountains
Atop you’ll go to the heaven’s door
Go and I’ll return
I’m cold, I’ll return to the shore,
Then to the depths where I belong
So I move back
Across the green carapaces
And the ruddy shells
Into the silvery land that moves inward
Into the dark water
I don’t belong up there
So I’ll sleep for eternity
You go on with the heroes
And wines and ambrosias
Must be nice right?
Must be..
nice….
….
Ahmad Attr Feb 19
Stop keeping your lips shut
Stop looking at nothing around me
I could still love you
Iterum atque Iterum
I’ve told you I’m angry at you
Just to heal from your wounds
But I still come back to you
Iterum atque Iterum
This will be the last time
I won’t please you ever again
But I know I will let you hurt me
Iterum atque Iterum

Over and over and over again
I lie in my hot sultry bed
There are no more tears left to shed
Just the ever hungry hole in my chest

Iterum atque Iterum
No lessons to be learned
It’s all part of the cycle
Like the days and the seasons
When the love blossoms to hatred
For all the justified reasons

Now I will keep my lips shut
And look at nothing around you
Now I will stay angry at you
And do my best to hurt you
Until it’s too much
And I will run back for your divine touch
But you won’t do anything
You won’t say anything
Iterum atque Iterum
Ahmad Attr Feb 17
Loving
you
is
an
act
of
Loving
myself
Ahmad Attr Feb 16
The summer was white hot
The power of the sun peered through the leaves
The roads felt like a desert
The air washed out of its coldness
I was sitting outside the lab waiting for everyone
Everybody was leaving today
But I was leaving for forever
Never coming back to this place ever again

And when everybody came out of the lab
With open arms, engulfing my body
I thought how hard it must be for them
To pretend to care that I’m leaving
One after another, wrapped their arms around my torso
I was waiting for you
I could have hugged you forever,
It was, of course, our final embrace after all
How’d it go? I don’t remember
Funny, I think it didn’t even happen

And through the golden haze, in the barren café
We sat for our final drinks
Stirring the ice in the cold mango milkshakes
Gripping my fingers hard out of contempt
Even in the last day, I can’t talk to you
We sat in silence- no, I sat in silence
While you talked to people who mattered to you
And I listened, like I always did, like I always do
Before I could begin counting seconds
The time was up
You were leaving, so I thought maybe I should too
I watched you walk further and further away
‘’Look back’’, I thought, ‘’just once’’
You didn’t
So I began to tread on the rough path as well
Watching you stride across the road
Through the holes between the leaves
I watched you leave
Like I always did, like I always do
We began to walk in different directions
You, towards the rising moon
And I, towards the setting sun

There are so many things you could’ve said
To make me feel at least something mattered in the end
But now I walked in the blazing heat, towards my home
Looking at my quivering, sweaty hands, thinking
''If this is how it ends
I wish it never began''
Ahmad Attr Feb 13
I was really happy today
Maybe it was the medicines
Or maybe I just wanted to be happy
I wake up with a smile,
Lifting the edge of my lips at both corners
I grab my blue bottle to fill it with water
5 AM
I am standing by water taps
I come back flailing my bottle
I sleep again

I was really happy today
When I woke up again
I met my friends, all preparing for the classes
Put on my white shirt, brown pants and glasses
I was so happy that I didn’t even go
I laid down just giggling and beaming
But then I decided to go

I was really happy today
I had 2 milkshakes of mangoes
And 3 slices of chocolate breads
And my sweet sweet medicines
I walked and talked with new people
I did new things, I am different person
Like I have decided to be

I was really happy today
Sweet medicines, smiles
The exercise
More medicines after a while
I really was happy today

But then you came along
You made me realize
Why I wanted to leave everything in the first place
Why I’m angry all the time
You infuriate me
And I know why
I have devoted way too much of my time to you
Way too much of my everything
And at this point, I don’t want it to be all for nothing
I want you to acknowledge me
But it feels like a betrayal
I’ve wasted way too many good words on you
Hundreds of poems for someone who can’t even read my eyes
But something is different this time
I am not coming back to you again
I swear to god
I am not coming back to you again
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