How can I hate something
So much
when I never really
had it?

Like when two best friends
love each other but
hide it because they
value their friendship

Or when a mean popular boy
picks on a school newbie girl
then ended up
falling for each other

Then also there was this girl
with mean sisters and a stepmother
but found her happy ending
in the arms of a man
whom she just met in a dance

And how can i forget
when some girl fell inlove
with a man in just a glimpse of a sight,
then they eventually got married,
had children, and grandchildren,
got old together and died together
still holding each other's hand

suddenly I stop
staring into space
inside my room
and ask myself

What is my story?
Did I even had one?

I started feeling pain
right at the center of my chest
and tears just fell from my eyes
because at that moment I realized

that ...my life is empty

and as much as I like to blame others
really I DO!
a great big wall just crashed me
with one single hit saying


ITS ALL MY FAULT

Though sometimes there's days,
   I feel all alone;
Even with family beside me,
   a house not a home.

I know that I'm loved,
   but still shed a tear;
For to be all alone,
   is life's greatest fear!

Alone is a dark place,
   so dreary and bleek;
It creeps in with fury,
   turns strong men to weak!

When I'm heavy and lonesome,
   my heart so so sad;
I remember Christ My Saviour,
   He helps me feel glad!

I remember He loves me,
   He's been here for me;
Once suffering and lonely,
   but now I'm set free!

My heart now so happy,
   my sadness all gone;
With Christ in my life,
   I sing a new song!

He's shown me forgiveness,
   my sins washed away;
He's filled me with gladness,
   and mercy to stay!

A new day had dawned,
   His grace He has shown;
With Him right beside me,
   I'm never alone!

Ever had that time where,
You stop in the middle of a movie
Because you realize
It ain't real...

Then you close your TV
Or your book with that
Same old love story
Leaving you
with that ache,..that pain
right between your heart
as you close your eyes
tears suddenly fell by
Because all you can remember is
It ain't real...

Its never been real
It never happened
Not to me that is.

Every Disney movie
Always end in this illusion that
"They all live happily ever after"
But actually they didn't
They never did

Because life is filled with
Lies and mistakes
There's no escape to it
Or detour to avoid it
you just simply have to
endure it

Pain and despair is meant to be felt
Hiding it will only make it worse
Because piling it up, makes your load
That... much... heavier

Then one day, you'll find yourself
Hating everything around you
Text, pictures and even food
Nothing makes you happy anymore
Nothing...

But then again,
For all you know it

I ain't real

Words don’t come so easy these days,
They no longer taste of vintage wine,
Maybe I’m the last gasp of a dying breed,
Or maybe I’m a failure by design,

You ran out of patience for tomorrow,
I ran out of hope and foolish pride,
I had no more answers I could sell you,
No more places in my head to hide,

Last night I was sleeping in an airport,
Maybe I was lost inside your smile,
Come and wake me when I get there,
Call me when I’m back in style,

I won’t apologize again for leaving,
I’m only sorry if I let you down,
But after all the oceans had run dry,
There was nowhere left for me to drown,

I told you a tale of bold surrender,
You heard a story of morose decay,
I didn’t mean to lead to this conclusion,
But I wrote it all to end this way,

The words all came so easy back then,
Burning my lips like old moonshine,
But maybe I’m still the first star you see,
Or maybe I’m the future in decline.