Your car got taken for a measly sum, and mine went to the flames under the winter sun, so we both lost out before our time was done, but im tryna tell you that it all matters none.
Before we started this war of excommunication and going *** for tat over every nonsensical spat, there was something golden coating what we had, but somehow we ended up throwing it in the trash, and I'd give every arm and leg that i have to get it back.
Now i know its been a while since youve heard my voice, and i apologize if i start to cry, its just that i dont know how to handle how strange it feels to know that at least ive tried.

You blame everyone for their own imperfections because you're too afraid to admit that you're terrified of your own reflection

There and here i disappear for reasons easy to understand but hard to find the root of,, and my branches dont bend these days, theyve all begun to break
Down and out, back again, and then thrown out the door again, always lost, always confused, and on the losing end
Of life, of love, of simple self fufilment, ive tried every way you speak of yet i do not feel whole
Where i lie, with glassy eyes, i try to find the spies that lie amongst the company with which i try
To keep appearances and quaint relations, much a bother, i cant be dealt with
Desire, a pitchfork,  flames or stone
It does not matter to ne, for none shall own my throne

Sometimes i feel so small, and so weak that i cant even hold the weight of my skin over my bones. The shaking of my skeleton rattles in my chest, making my shallow, trembling breaths sound like the ringing of the phone when i try to call you, and when you pick up is when my heart tries to skip a thousand beats, but drags itself on the ground for a thousand miles instead, bleeding and losing life every inch of the way.

If every poem written in love was a prayer to god for peace, i could make non believers out of the highest priests, and if every little note was a cry for mercy and relief, i could bury all of hell under the weight of my grief

If only you knew
How you consumed
How i tried to resist
Strength of your wrists
Your salt in my wounds
I took your medicine
You prescribed doom
I sat alone in your room
Speaking to your ghost
And your spirit loomed
Over a darkened room
I saw you and your skin
Paying the price for sins
I'll forgive you for them
We can go back to when
Everything was clean
Smartly running devine
Every gear spun on time
All cogs were aligned
I just want to restore
The love that i swore
Forever and ever more