lost the world
Forgot to care
Falling out of the unfamiliar
Felt strange
like I had been there before
thoughts quietened
My anxiety felt at home
At peace
Their opinions didn't matter
Didn't care
Stacked them high as I could
Just another brick in the wall
Separates them from me
Laying here in the sand
Hear Floyd above the waves
Ocean crashing into me
Making a little more sense each time
Wish you were here to feel this
Like walking on the rails at midnight
Never noticing the train
Alone
Free
And in reference to another one
I was finally
Comfortably numb
Feb 3, 2019
Feb 3, 2019 at 1:33 PM UTC
That dream again
recurring melodies of waves lifting my spirit
the harmony soothing
Making me more comfortable than I've ever been
daydreaming in a dream
gazing at the scenery
tips of my fingers wading in water
Cool to the touch
Seems perfect
and it is
It's hard to explain
As if each eye sees something else
an overlay so to speak
because it's cloudy and then not
I can see the sun's rays
but I can't feel its heat
dog days of summer
But common sense is telling me I might need a jacket
It's bright out I almost have to squint
The water reminds me space
Unending
There's a mist sitting just above
I imagine it the same color blue
The air is heavy but no humidity
Everything around seems still
Floating around in the atmosphere
Surrounded by clouds
I fall
I see myself as this is happening
Face to face
I don't know if he sees me
He looks lost in thought
Yet completely aware of everything
Time almost pauses
maybe just waited
It's us concealed by mist at the bottom of a waterfall
A nightmare or
I cant tell
it's a scary kind of beautiful
And
That's it
Feb 3, 2019
Feb 3, 2019 at 2:56 AM UTC
It is
what it'll never be again
happening as everything
climbs and falls back down.
I'm here cause I wasn't
because you're not yet
If there's us
then there's them
talking to
the same sky
saying that us
this hell
To it
It is
heaven
Feb 3, 2019
Feb 3, 2019 at 2:51 AM UTC
Happiness is nothing in the light
it’s not what i see
not the one at my side
nothing that occupies space
happiness is what’s there when I close my eyes
a lullaby sung by the night
that let me forget the world
remembering
exactly who and whomever I am
If it’s just a dream
then tell me your nightmare.
Joy and pain
numerous feelings
new emotions I could never explain.
There I never felt lost.
There I’m not alone
I’m safe
Happiness is a dream to me
Feb 3, 2019
Feb 3, 2019 at 2:48 AM UTC
And so I ate the dope again
hard know where to begin
it was great
Made love started off in the shower
Was all awkward just picture a rope bridge
then I had to go *** again
what's become of me
I don't know
mr. Wrong
I guess
everything right I never do
Mr nascar I guess
Yup going in circles
f***** up I don't care
70 and I'm swerve
the car can't walk straight all the way there but ...
least I made sure you're back home
that's the kicker
I was just hiding in the closet
After you head-butted me in the face
calling the cops and I ate the dope again
I supposedly sabotage you
hey it's all good
my car breaks down I'll just walk
she don't see
that I love her
do anything for ever
Ever since I met her.
it seems that she notices me
yet it's just cuz I'm there
She says I'm the one
but not the one you're thinking of
I'm the one that did it
everything that's her past becomes me
it's crazy it happened so fast
I'm guessing three years now
I'm hiding in the closet
just got my nose smashed
yes I'm still complaining
that s*** hurt
just as much my fault
we both lovingly provoke
till death do us part
I don't see that I love her
and I still do
I see that I need to leave her
I know it's something I won't do
I see her come out sometimes
it makes me sad
that beautiful little girl in there
now something else
it's not her
maybe
this is the monster in me speaking
Maybe I am the one that's insane
I can't tell right from wrong or anything anymore
all I know is that ive seen her
and that seems alright with me
Jan 22, 2019
Jan 22, 2019 at 2:44 AM UTC
Numb to the facts
I'm immune to this
second-guessing confusions
the answers I once had
colliding in my head
catch fire exploding
even without hesitation
nothing I can do to stop it
once saw the pictures
glimpses of a hopeful future
but now adjusting an antenna
sitting
watching my reflection
reflecting failing
my view I can't put it in perspective
fog maybe snow
clouding my view
all I'm getting is static
The fallout taking over my screen
pounding my head til my knuckles bleed
I don't flinch
I can't feel anything
there's no tears
already on the floor at my side
uncertain of what lies ahead
speaking of the future as if it were already past tense
I broke my own heart I'm dying.
Gave into letting go
A single memory falls off my cheek
Chest barely rising
watching this blurry scene
My past the only one who remembers
What it was like
when I used to be me
Jan 19, 2019
Jan 19, 2019 at 1:15 AM UTC
I don't want to write
the light anymore
estranged from myself
I don't want it
no I'm not happy
I'm absent hearted
handcuffed to the tracks
no bravo no encore
Didnt care for the movie
much less the god **** replay
feeling the ties start to vibrate
my back numb from the steel
got a smile on my face
the key in my hand
it saddens me
all i see
a piece of scrap paper, pencil
two worn out hands
The rest
is all in my head
Jan 19, 2019
Jan 19, 2019 at 1:09 AM UTC
Is it worth it I wonder
Trying to look past the obvious
Going thru it
Over and over
Taking credit I feel
I don't deserve it
Was maybe once
Didn't see that you weren't
Genuine feelings no mistake I fell over
Learning nothing by looking at the cover
Hard time remembering
Understandable
Repetition subtle hints
Left undiscovered
Selective memories
Hundreds of me I used to be
Countless others I'd never let happen to you
Situations not necessarily circumstantial
Always without words my end
Multiple choice
Was you I wrote in
Confused I'm not
Delirium
I'll cut my ear off
Jan 19, 2019
Jan 19, 2019 at 1:08 AM UTC
1849
laying down at night thinking
wondering if it’s worth it to think about
hoping it’s not all what it seems
wishing for the moon to hurry
bringing The tide up past my feet
waking me hopefully
another life still me
dreaming dreams
crawling out of bed
no recollection of anything
how do I know
how do I know I’m not someone else’s dream
again and again being woke
seems like it took all night
but really just a few seconds
is this it
the end
why would it be different
just a glimpse
a lifetime in a moment
mine or yours
is it over
if I’m there but here
shouldn’t I feel it
is it right to say I’m mine
when ours makes more sense
-ywsm
Jan 19, 2019
Jan 19, 2019 at 1:04 AM UTC
I fell in love with the way your
body flowed
but overlooked
the rapids in the distance
so now
I'm trying not to drown
hoping instead
I'll just be swept out to sea
Jan 4, 2019
Jan 4, 2019 at 11:21 PM UTC