It’s 3:44 A.M.
you are not here but you are always on my mind and I hate you for it I do not know how to put these emotions into words but I know that when I look at you I only think about kissing you and I do not know where love is derived from and you hate that we’re in love I know it’s after midnight and you have work in the morning but maybe if I ask enough and maybe even beg enough you will come and see me right now but you’ll probably say no so I am leaving tonight at that
It’s 3:44 P.M.
you are right next to me but I still don’t know where you really are and twelve hours ago I was craving your presence and now I’m regretting it you forgot that kissing is more intimate than *** and you still hate that I can **** you and not kiss you and that pushes you away from me you always assume that I never think about you so I push you away further but I can promise you twelve hours ago you still were on my mind I wanted you to come and see me right then but I did not ask you to because you’d probably say no but now I am stuck losing you due to my lack of communication so I am leaving today at that
Nov 30, 2020
Nov 30, 2020 at 6:58 PM UTC
I know you hate when my writings are
sad I didn’t mean it when I said “I can’t
be without you” I meant “how could you
do this to me and now you’re not here” I want
to hate you but instead I call you when I need
something about phone *** makes me feel
horrible every time it’s the only time
you give me attention now that you’re
gone I sit in my room listening to versions
of “Tom’s Diner” and this feels like my version
of “Teenage Fever” I’ve been working on a
poem about you it’s seventeen pages long
I won’t show anyone when it’s finished
because I’m embarrassed I’ve spent time
obsessing over the beaches we should’ve swam
at and the restaurants I could’ve introduced you
to and the dogs we would’ve named Steve and Rex
you’re going to read this and the only thing you’re
going to comment on is the fact that you never wanted
to name the dogs Steve and Rex and I won’t even be
mad because what else do I expect and I did this to
myself and what you don’t see is every reason why I love you
Jan 30, 2018
Jan 30, 2018 at 7:15 PM UTC
There’s only been few to see
me for who I am
I still need you
sometimes when I am alone
I call you but it goes to voicemail
these people I have acquainted myself with
make me feel more than you
I do not want you
but I would
rather feel insufficient
than nothing at all
I get a lump in my throat
when I think about the past
you’re the first thing I see
I am not like you anymore
I hate you for making me
who I am
no one else understands
I still need you sometimes
and I don’t know why
I am crying
May 22, 2017
May 22, 2017 at 10:59 PM UTC
I hate when I write and you
can't tell I'm being sarcastic
I want you so much I feel greedy
(that wasn't sarcastic)
I say I don't miss you
you should know I do
I don't think it's fair that
someone can think about
a person as much as I
think about you
think about this:
you being you and me
being me but together
all these people think I'm
writing for them
it's for you
Jan 3, 2017
Jan 3, 2017 at 1:14 AM UTC
I'm tired of writing poems
about staying up late and
sleeping all day because
you're haunting my thoughts
and creating sweet dreams
because you do not own me (
that's what I would say
if you did not own me I'm
tired of our routine but
never tired of you)
Jul 27, 2016
Jul 27, 2016 at 3:18 PM UTC
I’ve learned to appreciate everything
about you after you left me outside
in the rain on vacation
(we weren’t really on vacation
but it always felt like it).
Every time you disappeared, I
imagined the way you sway when
you’re feeling guilty. You never
wanted to hurt me, but influence
me positively. I remember when
you told me they were everything
I couldn’t be but we both had
a good laugh after that one.
I’m not like anyone you’ve had
before so you apologized for
coming and coming back to me
(I wouldn’t leave me either).
I did all the right things to keep
you around so it’s no surprise
that you forced me go
Jul 25, 2016
Jul 25, 2016 at 10:35 PM UTC
I haven’t been in love for a
while you move so quickly
but you touch so slowly I
feel your every experience you
remember I capture your
thoughts because you are all
of mine wait before you go and
make me just an experience your
twisted ideas are what get me
the most bittersweet pain and
pleasure comes from you laughing
at me because I am not good enough
Jul 10, 2016
Jul 10, 2016 at 9:37 PM UTC
I lost my virginity one time so I decided to become a poet
May 6, 2016
May 6, 2016 at 5:45 PM UTC
Kissing Strangers
is listed on your résumé under
Special Talents
you master these skills if
you practice every night
love you and leave you
sound the same being
whispered to you when
you are intoxicated
with the buzz of empty streets
as background music
when new things become old
lose their luster
it becomes necessary to replace them
so no one blames you when
your perfume made of whiskey
helps to find you
with your hand intertwined
with someone else’s because
that is just what you do
to everyone else
you’re a piece of ****
to you
not really though
Apr 28, 2016
Apr 28, 2016 at 12:16 AM UTC
Can a definition have a question in it? Because I have a question. Why can I feel you here, when you are clearly not? Your smell – I smell your smell – is everywhere. Your touches – I feel your touches – are all over my body. But I do not see you in the person that touches me, and whose scent lingers on me and my bed sheets for hours. Although you are clearly something I can touch and hold, you are not because you are not the person that I wanted so long ago. And then the question that is: “do people ever actually change, or do you just get sick of their personality?” comes up. Because I can promise you, I was so sure I could never get tired of you. So it hurts me that when I look at you, or I am with you, I am really not. You look at me with a destination in your eyes that I’ve never seen. And that’s when I realize that I can no longer touch you anymore.
Apr 25, 2016
Apr 25, 2016 at 1:10 AM UTC