my love, can I ask you why?
why the stars I wait to see keeps shining even when the moon goes faint
why the stars last so long
why some die a quiet death, but some fall
and why it was easy to say you no longer love me the way you used to?
even when I chose to love you everyday, even when it hurts–especially when it hurts.
Jul 11, 2018
Jul 11, 2018 at 10:25 AM UTC
And there's this sense of uneasiness by just the mention of that name,
a name I so badly want to bury and remember no more
just one look and we both know
who it is that still lurks in the depths of your mind
Apr 27, 2017
Apr 27, 2017 at 9:01 AM UTC
It's 10:30 and I'm typing this down. Yes, I am thinking of you. I think of you before I sleep and I think of you when I wake up. I miss you quite more than I show you when we meet. If I could, I would have never let you go. I would have held you then kissed you until you run out of breath or possibility to the point where you can't feel your lips anymore but just mine. I want to make you mine in all ways possible. And believe me, I will. That's why I'm looking forward to someday. Someday we'll have those adventures, we'll travel, we'll try new things. We'll get lost and scream at the top of our lungs. We'll forget what we left behind and just be with each other. Talk about the most random things, talk about the things that matter most. Or maybe not talk… maybe just lay under the stars me in your arms, doing things till we fall asleep... I want to know what bothers you. I want to know how you view the world. I want to explore you and dive in you. In your embrace, in your voice, in your smell– in my solace. Please take me away. Please save me from my thoughts. I imagine great beautiful things of how our someday would be but I also have these thoughts that won't let me sleep without me talking to you. I'm sorry if I bother you. I'm sorry if I am. I hope you find time to not be lazy for me. I hope you'll be patient with the ever clingy girl who loves you very much. I hope that I make you happy. I hope that I'll always be the only one even if there are a lot of girls where you are. I hope you believe that we can make it until someday. I hope that you love me too. Because my thoughts are killing me thinking of the possibility that you might not feel the same way anymore. I may be tired, but I guess I wouldn't be with you. I hope you're sleeping well right now. I hope you dream of me. I hope and pray and wish. Good morning, my solace. I am overthinking again. I wish I can make it stop.
Apr 2, 2017
Apr 2, 2017 at 9:05 PM UTC
my heart hurts
and i'm afraid that
that would be the last thing it does
Mar 30, 2017
Mar 30, 2017 at 5:37 AM UTC
Hello, depression
you came back.
I didn't miss you
but I do remember you
quite too well.
I felt great when I was free of you
I was functioning, I was laughing
I was happy.
No, I do not need to be reminded of how worthless I am
The people who gave up on me have proved it all
No, I do not need to know how terrible I am
I see myself in the mirror everyday
I hide myself and my thoughts everyday
I do not need to know my flaws
because I already feel their presence even in silence
especially in silence
I despise you.
If you're going to **** me, do it quick
not creeping slowly when I'm silent, not when I'm alone, not when I wake up at 3 am, not when I still feel.
Do it. Please do **** me faster
so I'll be rid of you.
Mar 9, 2017
Mar 9, 2017 at 6:34 AM UTC
they say they miss me
but no one will do anything about it
Feb 19, 2017
Feb 19, 2017 at 8:57 AM UTC
because I've been missing you lately
baby, do you love me?
even when all these thoughts are cloudy?
baby, do you love me?
because I need you. Please save me.
baby, do you love me?
*** I love you very much, my one and only.***
Feb 4, 2017
Feb 4, 2017 at 2:23 PM UTC
Can we go back?
to our fort
where we hid our secrets and got every chance we could
Can we go back?
to our stage
where no matter how blinding the lights could be, you'd still stare at me
Can we go back?
to our song
where we'd dance and your eyes, god those eyes, would burn down to my heart
Can we go back?
to yesterday
where I was in your arms, drowning in your scent, feeling warmth despite the storm
Can we fast forward?
to tomorrow's morrow
where I can be with you happily without sorrow
Jan 28, 2017
Jan 28, 2017 at 9:41 AM UTC
someday I will wake up next to you.
oh my, how lovely that sounds
how warm it feels around my heart
someday we won't have to hide.
with me holding your hand as strangers pass by
with me kissing your lips without fear, without second thoughts.
someday we wont have to face the distance
we can finally be together
finally free from their grasp
but util that someday, I'll have to bear the emptiness when you are gone, the dread of you not being around, and the pure bliss of you finally coming home to me.
Oct 22, 2016
Oct 22, 2016 at 7:58 AM UTC