for a thalassophobic like me
drowning never sounded so good
Nov 14, 2019
Nov 14, 2019 at 7:59 PM UTC
People are always so full
of themselves
but when you need to depict yourself
apart from all the valid reasonable
arguments
you just forget who you really are
you turn into a carrion &
your now cold dead eyes are the ones
in the crow's beak
its unsuccesful attempts to
taste your weaknesses
from inside out
it would never be able to chase you down
but now that you're a parting gift
welcome be the one
that will dissect you quick & harshly
they won't ever care
about what you were
or could be in life
your hopeless future could've come about
once or twice
but you tried hard enough to stop it
by giving yourself a lethal deadline
weren't you?
Aug 1, 2017
Aug 1, 2017 at 1:22 AM UTC
I know i'm not really myself
when i'm doing this
I'm not quite myself very often
to be honest
but I regret
every single time I wasn't there myself.
I hate this disease
i hate this disorder
and the things it makes me do
when I'm in an island
far away from myself
living in a reality
where stolen things are quite better
than my own
and the moon shines, bitter & anguished
because I stole its shine away
and put it on the star
that lingers in my stolen
rag heart.
Oct 24, 2016
Oct 24, 2016 at 6:41 PM UTC
I am what i am
I stay in my position until i can not
I am full of words inside me &
although you might think you have
you haven't seen anything like them before
I am full of stars & galaxies
and i'm here to tell you
you haven't been with anyone like me before
I live & i die many times a day
just to shine bright the next day
just to remind you
that i'm the one
who own myself
now & ever.
Aug 30, 2016
Aug 30, 2016 at 4:51 PM UTC
Do you ever hear yourself
begging for an embrace or
a shadowy surprise getting into the dim-lit room
you're in
for a whisper coming from
the back of your neck
to settle your nerves down
when you're sobbing so hopelessly
in your bed at night?
Aug 30, 2016
Aug 30, 2016 at 4:32 PM UTC
i miss the sight of blood
flowing out
of this body
as much as i miss
the safety & false brief relief
that used to lead me
to my own depths.
May 27, 2016
May 27, 2016 at 3:33 AM UTC
If i could do anything
to stop
this suffering
i probably wouldn’t
for i’m so used to it
that i can’t even
picture myself
out of it &
it hurts even more
to admit that
i probably don’t want to
Mar 29, 2016
Mar 29, 2016 at 11:03 AM UTC
There's a perpetual silence
around myself
but I can't help hearing
the ghosts of my voice
inside my head
I wonder if I am going insane
or if this is just
how life works
once you're ready to admit
to yourself
that you'll never be
anything else
but this
no more changing
no more failed attempts
to become someone better
there's no escape
and still I try
as much as everyone else
even though all of us know
that the silence
screams louder
when we keep our mouth shut.
Nov 12, 2015
Nov 12, 2015 at 10:02 AM UTC
I haven't always been like this
once i was a girl
that didn't believe
in the possibility of love & all that comes with it
all the feelings & anxiety
all the smiles & cuddles
all the great moments shared
with someone
you truly care about &
would die for them to be happy
if you could,
although i know that most of the times
things aren't always marvelous
and to be honest, they seem to be
quite tough,
because sharing a life & yourself as a whole
with someone
isn't as easy as it seems
because people are not easy to deal with
because i'm not easy to deal with
and because you're also not easy to deal with
but for me, that's the trick of it all
if we were easy to deal with,
it wouldn't be so beautiful
all those times after a fight
when we try to be mad at each other
but we just can't
because the desire to see the other smiling again
is always bigger than any reason worth a fight
but even the reasons that aren't worth it,
brings a good yet so confusing feeling
about the need to fight
to confront each other
because then again
you're sharing some part of you
and it's a part that matters so much
that you just can't help keep it only to yourself
and that's why i love you
because you're difficult to deal with
and because you're the best person
i have ever got into a fight with,
and the pleasure of being this someone
is all mine.
Nov 7, 2015
Nov 7, 2015 at 7:06 PM UTC