you’re sweet
But don't expect me to write love poetry
Dec 19, 2019
Dec 19, 2019 at 11:47 PM UTC
I want it to be you
But I can't make my heart feel
Something it won't.
You were the air in my lungs
Inhale a kiss
Exhale in lies
Sometimes I wonder
Does my voice sound the same
If the love song is not for you
Am I still beautiful
If my eyes don't shine for you
Sometimes I wonder
If I'm in your dreams
If you wish I was yours
Sometimes I wonder how deep the hurt goes
Sometimes I wonder
I hate this. I hate how were so distant and all that's left of us is our ghosts how when you smile its not the same because you know I can't be yours in the way you want me to be .
I see clearly
When I was afraid I clung to you because I thought you were the only thing that could save me but when I see you in this light I realize you are not what I need
Only what I wanted you to be
I'm sorry
I didn't want to break your heart or hurt you but all I seem to do is make it worse
****
How can I help you when it was I who hurt you?
How will we recover
how will we see the light?
I hate this
I ******* hate this
Dec 19, 2019
Dec 19, 2019 at 11:44 PM UTC
So I guess I thought I was a poet
But my mind was so filled with him that I couldn’t even find me
So I guess I tried being a songwriter
But my fingers could never find the chords
Or the lyrics
Or the rhythms
So then I guess I fancied myself an artist
But surprise surprise
The slightest touch of pencil to paper appalled me
So I guess I’m not a poet or a writer or an artist
But today at least I like myself a little more than yesterday
And maybe that’s enough
Dec 19, 2019
Dec 19, 2019 at 11:37 PM UTC
broken souls slump against battered brick walls
the avenue drowning in cheap perfume
drawing in the tired
slick pavement melts the neon lights, bathing the cold street in red reflections
she puffs on a cigarette
smoke clearing her head as it fills her lungs
her lips taste are made of whiskey and a million well kept secrets
her smile never reveals too much
but she has learned not to be afraid
she has learned to keep her head up
she sighs and straightens her back
it’s showtime
Jul 16, 2019
Jul 16, 2019 at 10:31 AM UTC
I don’t know you
not really anyway
it’s small talk if not silence
but I do know that
you want to be reborn as flowing water
me as a ray of light
maybe
in another way
in another life
just maybe
we could learn to love each other
May 23, 2019
May 23, 2019 at 6:37 PM UTC
to hate is all we know
it is safety
but what fool mistakes strangulation for affection.
although you have surrendered your icy grip on my heart
in the early hours
cold fingers still pry my eyes open
so you can seep into the edge of my vision
when i dream, you sleep beside me
when I breathe, you are in my lungs
a whisper
a steady rhythm
a constant reminder
to be burdened is all we know
it is safety
but despite that
i exhale
and i let you go
Jan 22, 2019
Jan 22, 2019 at 6:56 PM UTC
it's snowing in november
i'm not surprised though
i have an essay due tomorrow
but calm beats are twinkling into my earbuds
somewhere a light switches off
and i can taste your perfume at the back of my throat
a whisper in the crowd
in the place between dreaming and consciousness
i can feel your skin
and you smile against my lips
and all i want is to get lost in this
...
but i have an essay due tomorrow
and i'm thinking about you again
Nov 4, 2018
Nov 4, 2018 at 1:57 PM UTC
the bell jingles as she steps into the holiday stationstore
on the corner of two discarded streets, signs too battered to read
there was free hot chocolate on tuesdays
it was always a little too sweet
the cream-colored tile is stained by thousands of half-cleaned messes
the faint squeak of the roller grill complimenting
cheesy pop music
bright packages scream brand names she never buys
she picks a cup, the smallest size
and fills it
ignoring the drips of pumpkin spice on the counter,
left by a hurried predecessor
she adds cream
she doesn't think about the calories
she doesn't think about what her friends are up to
she doesn't think about how much she hates hearing this **** song
she thinks about grabbing a snickers for the road
shredded black combat boots thump to the register
she sets her snickers bar on the counter
paying the cashier (jeremy) with a crumpled dollar bill
his gray eyes brim with something like pity, like they do every week
she pretends not to see
he says something
she pretends not to hear
he says something else
she walks out
icy rain makes her pull her hood tighter
she sips the cocoa
it always was a little too sweet
Oct 10, 2018
Oct 10, 2018 at 12:06 AM UTC
she looked out from the inside
at the world
rushing by
all the people hurried past
and no one ever smiled
no one had the time
no one had the time
to stop
and look at her
really look at her
why would they look?
she was plain
anyone could see that
with brown eyes and straight brown hair
she had acne on her forehead
her front teeth stuck out a little
anyone could see that
she had a nervous habit of biting her nails
then again all her habits were nervous
but anyone could see that
but she was not plain
she had eyes that melted into honey when she laughed
and turned to a starless night when she cried
sunlight would frame her profile, just to be close to her skin
and when a smile graced her lips
the world held its breath
because look at her
just
look
Sep 12, 2018
Sep 12, 2018 at 9:47 PM UTC