thisismysecret
Sometimes I think too much. Sometimes I write. Sometimes I rant. And sometimes I don't even finish my sentences. I am not a poet nor am I a professional writer. I am a wild soul, caught up in this tumultuous roller coaster ride of life. Sometimes I like to take photos of my life and vent about little things. And I'd like to share them with you.
I just want to cuddle with a guy and have his arms wrapped around me and when I'm cold or sad he will pull me closer to his chest, so close I can hear his heartbeat and then have him pull the cover over us and just fall asleep in his arms.
Mar 12, 2014
Mar 12, 2014 at 9:18 PM UTC
I am a flower and you are the sun
I need you so much more
then you need me.
don't leave me in the dark.
Mar 11, 2014
Mar 11, 2014 at 10:47 PM UTC
I let you control me
and I don't do anything about it.
Why do I let you control me?
I let everything go your way.
I shouldn't,
but I do.
Whatever you say goes.
I need to stop before this gets too far.
But I can't even stand up for myself.
Mar 11, 2014
Mar 11, 2014 at 10:46 PM UTC
The past three years have given me enough reasons
to never fall in love, or at least not with the ones
who do not deserve it.
It's much easier falling for the wrong person
than it is to piece yourself together
and wait for the right one.
But for the future, I will not allow
foolish boys with pretty eyes and a killer smile
to charm me with their lies.
I will watch them move mountains
and walk miles just so they can hold my hands.
I will make sure they own their right
to discover how my veins twist and tuck themselves
beneath my skin.
The next time I allow a boy
to kiss me, I want to know there is truth
behind his eyes and love in his heart.
I will not have another trial and error
and I will not play victim in another game.
The next time I fall, it will be into someone worth falling for.
And I will learn to love, the right way this time.
I will love so wonderfully that it will make me question
why I ever stopped believing in people
and in feelings.
I will love with all that I was, all that I am,
and all that I will become.
Mar 11, 2014
Mar 11, 2014 at 5:46 PM UTC
"I am trusting you" I say.
I don't want to,
but I will.
It's not the fear of walking
into another man's world,
I fear getting lost in it.
I don't like to lose control
of my surroundings.
and end up
in an unknown place.
I am not good with directions.
I barely understand
how to use GPS
on my phone.
And maps make it worse
because I cannot
read maps
to save my life.
I am trusting you.
Lead me
to the right place.
Mar 11, 2014
Mar 11, 2014 at 5:38 PM UTC
I know this may not end well
I know that I probably should've let you go
But I can't help it
I can't stay away from you
Your love is like my drug
I need a dosage of your nicotine tinted lips
I need the secure feeling of your arms tightening around me
As we sleep as if you want to protect me from the demons in my head
I need to hear the sound of your laughter
I need you in my life right now
Mar 11, 2014
Mar 11, 2014 at 5:35 PM UTC
Seriously debating on graduating and deleting all my social media and starting fresh w/o all the bad people in my life.
Mar 11, 2014
Mar 11, 2014 at 1:24 AM UTC
I have this daydream of me finally getting my license and being able to drive to a mellow coffee shop and have a nice alone time, just doing what I like doing best that makes me happy. Imagine that, sitting at a table, with a good book or my poetry journal, listening to reggae and just drink and relax. Not thinking about the bad things, forgetting my problems. That would be nice.
Mar 11, 2014
Mar 11, 2014 at 1:10 AM UTC
I'm sorry
I mess up so much
I'm sorry
I hurt you constantly
I'm sorry
I put you through a lot
I'm sorry
I'm so hard to handle
I'm sorry
You have to put up with me
I'm so sorry.
You deserve better
But I am selfish and only want you for myself.
Mar 11, 2014
Mar 11, 2014 at 12:47 AM UTC