thediaryofmyalterego - Hello Poetry

I still cannot believe that you got me convinced all this **** is somehow related to love. well, tonight I’m bleaching my heart. and, of course, I’ll forget to put on the gloves, so I’ll blister quite bad. but as long as it works, I really don’t mind. as I’ll be scrubbing the pain, which will take quite a while, I’ll notice a big warning sign: “use with caution, it erases it all”. I’ll stop scrubbing, tears will start running down. then I’ll smile and start scrubbing harder, thinking: “finally, what a great bargain”.

0

Dec 4, 2019

Dec 4, 2019 at 6:09 AM UTC

Bargain

I still cannot believe that you got me convinced all this **** is somehow related to love. well, tonight I’m bleaching my heart. and, of course, I’ll forget to put on the gloves, so I’ll blister quite bad. but as long as it works, I really don’t mind. as I’ll be scrubbing the pain, which will take quite a while, I’ll notice a big warning sign: “use with caution, it erases it all”. I’ll stop scrubbing, tears will start running down. then I’ll smile and start scrubbing harder, thinking: “finally, what a great bargain”.

16

my demons really like his sanity. it is not mutual.

0

Sep 15, 2019

Sep 15, 2019 at 5:10 AM UTC

Him #3

my demons really like his sanity. it is not mutual.

2

he is my biggest source of sanity, he is my biggest source of crazy too.

0

Sep 14, 2019

Sep 14, 2019 at 4:54 PM UTC

Him #2

he is my biggest source of sanity, he is my biggest source of crazy too.

2

it’s tough to be the needy one that wants to be around all the time. without him, my life consists of days to count. he says he counts them too but then, no way to find out...

0

Sep 14, 2019

Sep 14, 2019 at 4:51 PM UTC

Him #1

it’s tough to be the needy one that wants to be around all the time. without him, my life consists of days to count. he says he counts them too but then, no way to find out...

6

I’ll destroy every little last bit of you I’ve collected too scared of losing, Stashed behind the books that are sort of stupid, Such as guides to becoming a perfect human. I’ll throw it out the window while it rains, The weather has recently been truly perfect. Perfect for having long-term depressions And thinking of people that ain’t even worth it. I’ll, of course, make sure there are no neighbours They will 100% tell my mom and she’ll make a scene Screaming: "Are you going ******* crazy?!" Being more in love with you than I’ve ever been. But then hopefully a gang of street cats Will in one way or another disgrace it. Or perhaps very drunk teenagers will, I’ve seen quite a few of them around lately. So I’ll just stand at my balcony staring At that **** being literally shat on. Hopefully, it will make me feel better, Hopefully, I’ll get over it.

0

Mar 4, 2019

Mar 4, 2019 at 12:55 PM UTC

Midnight Contemplations #3

I’ll destroy every little last bit of you I’ve collected too scared of losing, Stashed behind the books that are sort of stupid, Such as guides to becoming a perfect human. I’ll throw it out the window while it rains, The weather has recently been truly perfect. Perfect for having long-term depressions And thinking of people that ain’t even worth it. I’ll, of course, make sure there are no neighbours They will 100% tell my mom and she’ll make a scene Screaming: "Are you going ******* crazy?!" Being more in love with you than I’ve ever been. But then hopefully a gang of street cats Will in one way or another disgrace it. Or perhaps very drunk teenagers will, I’ve seen quite a few of them around lately. So I’ll just stand at my balcony staring At that **** being literally shat on. Hopefully, it will make me feel better, Hopefully, I’ll get over it.

20

I wanted to see him in daytime And do things other than *** That’s when I knew for sure, I should be seeing him less.

0

Mar 4, 2019

Mar 4, 2019 at 12:50 PM UTC

Reality check

I wanted to see him in daytime And do things other than *** That’s when I knew for sure, I should be seeing him less.

4

i am the one the russian ****** girl who has been calling you quite often late quite often high i know it must have felt annoying i do apologise but don't you miss my nonsense calls sometimes?

0

Jan 25, 2019

Jan 25, 2019 at 12:47 PM UTC

different kind of 'the one'

i am the one the russian ****** girl who has been calling you quite often late quite often high i know it must have felt annoying i do apologise but don't you miss my nonsense calls sometimes?

12

used to say: “i can’t live without” yet for some reason still perfectly breathing

0

Dec 18, 2018

Dec 18, 2018 at 7:20 PM UTC

love is pathetic #1

used to say: “i can’t live without” yet for some reason still perfectly breathing

2

You’d ask how many guys I’ve dated, really wanting to know how many guys I’ve ****** ...or have ****** me? Well, anyway, it doesn’t really matter, the point is - you're getting into numbers. I’ll joke about how guys would multiply it and how girls like doing it the other way around. You’d say: "Just go ahead, I honestly don’t care." How cute, you're terrible at lying. So I’ll do that, I’ll go ahead, I will divide it. You'll smile, I will smile back hoping you bought the number.

0

Sep 15, 2018

Sep 15, 2018 at 12:24 PM UTC

That question

You’d ask how many guys I’ve dated, really wanting to know how many guys I’ve ****** ...or have ****** me? Well, anyway, it doesn’t really matter, the point is - you're getting into numbers. I’ll joke about how guys would multiply it and how girls like doing it the other way around. You’d say: "Just go ahead, I honestly don’t care." How cute, you're terrible at lying. So I’ll do that, I’ll go ahead, I will divide it. You'll smile, I will smile back hoping you bought the number.

13

I see him usually 2 times a week - He’s got a lot of work. Or does he? Nevertheless, it leaves me lots of time To got to gym And maintain that *** he wants. Which often makes me wonder Whether I'll see him if I stop to squat At all.

0

Sep 5, 2018

Sep 5, 2018 at 2:06 PM UTC

Midnight Contemplations #2

I see him usually 2 times a week - He’s got a lot of work. Or does he? Nevertheless, it leaves me lots of time To got to gym And maintain that *** he wants. Which often makes me wonder Whether I'll see him if I stop to squat At all.

9