I’m a mess
Everything we hate about me
Is a cruel sick DNA guarantee
I’m fighting
Fighting to breathe
Fighting to be still
Fighting to stay
Fighting my own demons
I’m so **** tired
I can’t do this anymore
I don’t wanna be here
I don’t wanna live
I want to die
I’m starting to truly give up
May 20
May 20, 2026 at 1:54 PM UTC
they walk around
their mind loud
they scream in silence
but no one hears them
can you see their eyes
the spark is gone
cruel words slip
down their tongue
dripping from their throat
with unknown malice
intentions are mixed
wonky in their head
blinding the truth
and piercing their lungs
with the sharpness
of the purity
May 18
May 18, 2026 at 8:46 AM UTC
school is ending
and i am relieved
because no more school
means no more stress
means no more failure
means no more disappointment
i finally have a chance
to look inside
myself and my soul
to look inside
my mind and body
to find what is wrong
and pick it out
like the parasite it is
but can i truly
get rid of the parasite
when the parasite
is all of me?
May 18
May 18, 2026 at 8:26 AM UTC
I wish to speak, but the words
Are locked behind my teeth
My skin prickles with the need
To crawl out from my skin
The urge to slice my own skin
Has squirmed its way back
My mind knows it's not good
It knows that I'm not good
But my heart is too tired to care
I smile at others with love
Thinking of how they wouldn't miss me
Of how if I just vanished
Everyone else would manage
She keeps me tethered
She reminds me that without me
She might go unsteady
So I withstand the suffering
All for her, because I love her
Because I love my mother
More than I could even
Begin to love anything
Or anyone else in the multiverse
Apr 29
Apr 29, 2026 at 6:49 PM UTC
Would you hate me
If I told you
I missed you
I want your hands
On my skin
I want my hands
In your hair
I want your heartbeat
Synced with mine
I want to kiss
The freckles on your skin
I want you
To be mine
Would you hate me
If I told you
Because I hate myself
For wanting to tell you
For wanting you
Apr 13
Apr 13, 2026 at 9:58 PM UTC
Their fingertips are stained
With the blood from their wrists
Their teeth are yellow
From the days they couldn't get up
To brush their teeth
Their thighs are scarred
From the nights things got too heavy
Their mind is plagued
With the voices that whisper
And their body is numb
From the coldness of those around them
Apr 11
Apr 11, 2026 at 12:02 AM UTC
We are over
I never played with your feelings
I truly loved you
I think I still do
But I cannot love a child forever
Because I am not a child
My mind is drained
From taking care of you
I want to be a lover
Not another's mother
I'm sorry
That I chose to be selfish
In one area of my life
When I let people walk all over me
In all others
I'm sorry
That I couldn't handle it
That I have too much
And I couldn't handle you
But now that we're over
I realize it's a good thing
You lied
You were manipulative
Still are
Playing the victim
Even though you aren't
You pretend as if
You can do no wrong
All while belittling yourself
In front of others
So they'll lift you up
Am I sorry I loved you?
No
Did I ever lie about loving you?
Never
But am I glad we're over?
Yes
Because I made the right decision for me
Because for once
I refused to sacrifice myself
So someone else could be happy
Apr 9
Apr 9, 2026 at 9:37 PM UTC
the thoughts get loud
my body feels heavy
i cannot breathe
i choke on my screams
can you see me?
Apr 4
Apr 4, 2026 at 7:11 PM UTC
The spaces between my ribs
The hollow of my throat
The tips of my fingers
The warmth of my bones
Is where the ache learned to rest
The ache of touching another
Phantom lips against my neck
The ghost of your hands on my sides
The lingering softness of your skin
The ache learned to rest
In my body, mind, and soul
Apr 1
Apr 1, 2026 at 4:23 PM UTC
I cannot breath
My eyes sting with tears
My lungs feel too small
The lump in my throat
Hurts
My skin prickles
With the thought
Of touching another
My mind is loud
Like a circus
And I am the court jester
A bird flits around
My chest
It’s wings beating
Against my ribs
Caged and afraid
Panic sits low
In my chest
I can’t seem to focus
My skin feels itchy
Like something
Is crawling
Over my bones
Swimming
Through my veins
And infecting my heart
I can hear everything
My voice is steady
Despite my insides
Screaming to get out
I cannot breathe
Someone help me breathe
Mar 21
Mar 21, 2026 at 9:28 PM UTC