the-consonance-in-dissonance

The memory of pain often colors My mind when all the walls of it turn dark. The light scars that I have from hobby knives Yearn loud and loud to open up once more. The blades scream loud as I suppress my cries And yet they beg and beckon for my thighs. Shall I go once more and see my own blood Leave the indents made on my mortal skin? Or shall I let the screams of my turmoil Bleed into ev'ry situation I'm in?

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Oct 10, 2021

Oct 10, 2021 at 1:14 PM UTC

Relapse

The memory of pain often colors My mind when all the walls of it turn dark. The light scars that I have from hobby knives Yearn loud and loud to open up once more. The blades scream loud as I suppress my cries And yet they beg and beckon for my thighs. Shall I go once more and see my own blood Leave the indents made on my mortal skin? Or shall I let the screams of my turmoil Bleed into ev'ry situation I'm in?

10

Maybe I'm the dark brown eyes you stare into The ones you see your reflection in Maybe I'm the hand combing through your jet black hair Or the voice in the wind on an empty rooftop bar Maybe I'm the brain you treat lesser than yours Or the body in the room that tells you that you're not alone Maybe I'm the throbbing **** you leave red Mac lipstick stains on Or the stern screams that remind you of your father Maybe I'm the lips touching your left cheek Or the fingers that fix your nose ring Who am I if not for all the times I've been cheated on? Why should I be more than a pincushion For all the times your dad didn't tell you he loved you? Who would I be to all of you if I weren't eyes, hands, barely a brain, a **** and lips ? Who am I if not a string of traumas Walking my way through a path paved with eggshells and broken glass? Who am I?

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Jul 20, 2020

Jul 20, 2020 at 5:32 AM UTC

A Fistful of Maybes

Maybe I'm the dark brown eyes you stare into The ones you see your reflection in Maybe I'm the hand combing through your jet black hair Or the voice in the wind on an empty rooftop bar Maybe I'm the brain you treat lesser than yours Or the body in the room that tells you that you're not alone Maybe I'm the throbbing **** you leave red Mac lipstick stains on Or the stern screams that remind you of your father Maybe I'm the lips touching your left cheek Or the fingers that fix your nose ring Who am I if not for all the times I've been cheated on? Why should I be more than a pincushion For all the times your dad didn't tell you he loved you? Who would I be to all of you if I weren't eyes, hands, barely a brain, a **** and lips ? Who am I if not a string of traumas Walking my way through a path paved with eggshells and broken glass? Who am I?

23

I spend my nights thinking of how you thought If ev'rything you said was all for naught. Did you love me true romantically Or did you just say it to not hurt me? My dear, I loved you with all that I had I thought we would both end up real glad But now I see that you didn't mean it Now all of this, to me, is pretty **** I wish you meant all of the things you said Maybe I wouldn't have wished I were dead, But I still love you in all honesty I wish you never said that you loved me Because I'm finding hardships moving on If we stayed friends this feeling would be gone, But you decided to ***** the floor And told me that you felt a feeling more I would've missed the style and way you kissed, But all I am right now is ******* ****** I really truly wish that you loved me Or maybe just let the friendship we had be

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Jul 13, 2019

Jul 13, 2019 at 3:20 PM UTC

I'm drunk and I hope you regret some things

I spend my nights thinking of how you thought If ev'rything you said was all for naught. Did you love me true romantically Or did you just say it to not hurt me? My dear, I loved you with all that I had I thought we would both end up real glad But now I see that you didn't mean it Now all of this, to me, is pretty **** I wish you meant all of the things you said Maybe I wouldn't have wished I were dead, But I still love you in all honesty I wish you never said that you loved me Because I'm finding hardships moving on If we stayed friends this feeling would be gone, But you decided to ***** the floor And told me that you felt a feeling more I would've missed the style and way you kissed, But all I am right now is ******* ****** I really truly wish that you loved me Or maybe just let the friendship we had be

20

I remember the night we met We kissed in the dark, dim lights Of a public parking lot We held hands, fingers intertwined I told myself I could get used to it Kissing you in dark, dim parking lot lights And we always kissed in them, holding hands I told myself I could get used to it I remember holding you tight Half my body hanging off The back seat of my X-Trail The kisses were worth the back pain I told myself I could get used to it Kissing you in dark, dim parking lot lights And we always kissed in them, holding hands I told myself I could get used to it I remember falling in love Actually, I didn't I made the choice to love you I thought I got it right for once I told myself I could get used to it Kissing you in dark, dim parking lot lights And we always kissed in them, holding hands I told myself I could get used to it I told myself I could get used to it Loving you in dark, dim parking lot lights And outside of dark, dim parking lot lights I never should have gotten used to it

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Jul 7, 2019

Jul 7, 2019 at 3:58 PM UTC

Parking Lot Lights

I remember the night we met We kissed in the dark, dim lights Of a public parking lot We held hands, fingers intertwined I told myself I could get used to it Kissing you in dark, dim parking lot lights And we always kissed in them, holding hands I told myself I could get used to it I remember holding you tight Half my body hanging off The back seat of my X-Trail The kisses were worth the back pain I told myself I could get used to it Kissing you in dark, dim parking lot lights And we always kissed in them, holding hands I told myself I could get used to it I remember falling in love Actually, I didn't I made the choice to love you I thought I got it right for once I told myself I could get used to it Kissing you in dark, dim parking lot lights And we always kissed in them, holding hands I told myself I could get used to it I told myself I could get used to it Loving you in dark, dim parking lot lights And outside of dark, dim parking lot lights I never should have gotten used to it

28

I'm lying in bed in the dark again My earphones are loudly playing your song I recall you saying you hated it, But this is one of the only ****** ways I can hear your beautiful voice again I'm afraid of calling you, honestly I'm afraid you'll tell me what I expect "We should just be friends. Can we just be friends?" I wanted you to be my lover, dear. I would have loved you as hard as I could Harder than I have ever loved before But you'd never let me love you like that Because to you, my love would chain you down You'd be a bird in a golden-barred cage, A skiff with a passenger ship's anchor, Someone who you never saw yourself as Someone you never really planned to be So maybe all of this was for the best Relationships, after all, hurt a lot So maybe all of this was for the best, But I'm unsure when my love for you shall rest

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Jun 19, 2019

Jun 19, 2019 at 12:27 PM UTC

My Fears, My Thoughts, and Me Finding Excuses As To Why I Shouldn't Love You

I'm lying in bed in the dark again My earphones are loudly playing your song I recall you saying you hated it, But this is one of the only ****** ways I can hear your beautiful voice again I'm afraid of calling you, honestly I'm afraid you'll tell me what I expect "We should just be friends. Can we just be friends?" I wanted you to be my lover, dear. I would have loved you as hard as I could Harder than I have ever loved before But you'd never let me love you like that Because to you, my love would chain you down You'd be a bird in a golden-barred cage, A skiff with a passenger ship's anchor, Someone who you never saw yourself as Someone you never really planned to be So maybe all of this was for the best Relationships, after all, hurt a lot So maybe all of this was for the best, But I'm unsure when my love for you shall rest

21

There is a star under the moon It looks like the star is under the moon I like to imagine it that way It's beautiful moon star I love how close they are They're so close Just two reaching hands away Like lovers separated By two metal fences Two different sides To two different worlds moon star You are so close Just reach Just touch Just love and be loved moon star But this is reality You're far, far away Beyond two metal fences But of two different sides Of two different worlds

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May 20, 2019

May 20, 2019 at 1:03 PM UTC

Moon, Numerator / Star, Denominator

There is a star under the moon It looks like the star is under the moon I like to imagine it that way It's beautiful moon star I love how close they are They're so close Just two reaching hands away Like lovers separated By two metal fences Two different sides To two different worlds moon star You are so close Just reach Just touch Just love and be loved moon star But this is reality You're far, far away Beyond two metal fences But of two different sides Of two different worlds

26

too close too far proximity in places true proximity is not permitted stings like bees on your arms and ants in your legs too close too far

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May 10, 2019

May 10, 2019 at 10:16 PM UTC

too close, too far

too close too far proximity in places true proximity is not permitted stings like bees on your arms and ants in your legs too close too far

8

Show me the world I never knew, darling The one where notes leap off and onto staves The world that beats on drums, and strums on strings, and sings as I sleep The world full of late nights in bars I never go to Where beer pours like ambrosia to the sound of galloping red horses I want to kiss you in your world, if you'd let me Let me into your world and let me look into your eyes the way I do when we're alone And I hope you look into mine the way you do when we're alone

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May 1, 2019

May 1, 2019 at 8:24 AM UTC

Into The Unknown

Show me the world I never knew, darling The one where notes leap off and onto staves The world that beats on drums, and strums on strings, and sings as I sleep The world full of late nights in bars I never go to Where beer pours like ambrosia to the sound of galloping red horses I want to kiss you in your world, if you'd let me Let me into your world and let me look into your eyes the way I do when we're alone And I hope you look into mine the way you do when we're alone

8

The sound of your voice Saying sweet things Still rings in my ears Like the sound of blades to bucklers The look in your eyes That show me the universes in your soul The ones I get in dimly lit parking lots I miss that Your hands They tell me you trust me When I hold them and when you hold me Without caring if they're sweaty or not Your cheeks The way they grow warm And they way they make you glow pink My hands cup them almost perfectly I wish I could hold them again The feel of your lips Smooth, pink, and velvety My lips glide upon yours I wish they would once more I'm not going to lie I've been missing you dearly The way flies miss the window Even if it's wide open I wish I could hold you again The way we hold each other when nobody is looking How we hold each other When we know nobody who sees us will care One of these days

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May 1, 2019

May 1, 2019 at 8:08 AM UTC

I want to see you again

The sound of your voice Saying sweet things Still rings in my ears Like the sound of blades to bucklers The look in your eyes That show me the universes in your soul The ones I get in dimly lit parking lots I miss that Your hands They tell me you trust me When I hold them and when you hold me Without caring if they're sweaty or not Your cheeks The way they grow warm And they way they make you glow pink My hands cup them almost perfectly I wish I could hold them again The feel of your lips Smooth, pink, and velvety My lips glide upon yours I wish they would once more I'm not going to lie I've been missing you dearly The way flies miss the window Even if it's wide open I wish I could hold you again The way we hold each other when nobody is looking How we hold each other When we know nobody who sees us will care One of these days

30

i'm soft like a warm towel fresh out the dryer hold me until i grow cold and warm me back up again i promise i'll try to be as warm so I can keep cupping your cheeks comfortably

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Apr 16, 2019

Apr 16, 2019 at 12:26 PM UTC

Fuzzy

i'm soft like a warm towel fresh out the dryer hold me until i grow cold and warm me back up again i promise i'll try to be as warm so I can keep cupping your cheeks comfortably

14