You had the flu last year.
You didn't know it then, but I stuck by your side.
You still don't recall it now.
Lifting tissues to your mouth, I lightly tapped your back.
Brewing fresh soup, I held an encouraging spoon to your lips.
I was never around after that.
I became someone you no longer knew,
A person you didn't want to know.
I was trapped in the tight grasp of your delusion.
Despite your hesitance, I would have stayed.
Had you not made it clear,
I would have offered a movie night,
I would have offered an extra blanket,
I would have done so much.
I've moved on with my life, I have an apartment.
But the frames hung across my walls tell whispers of our adventures.
And my secret soup recipe smells of you.
I still sometimes doubt myself, my conclusions.
I caught the flu last week.
As I blew my nose, and shakily nursed myself,
I thought about how little I helped you.
How much more I could have done.
When I returned to work today, I stared at myself in the mirror.
We have the same nose, similar eyebrows.
But my eyes had never held the same warmth as yours.
Distraught, I realised you will always be a part of me.
I will never escape your cold embrace.
I didn't choose you.
Oct 24, 2025
Oct 24, 2025 at 7:01 PM UTC
The sun could swallow me whole,
and I'd still think of you.
The moon could disappear,
and I'd still feel like I'm falling.
It's as unlikely as a tear my soul sheds, shreds.
Take away my wisdom,
And I'd still feel like I'm falling
With my feet suspended in the air, I'll plummet to the ground,
Like a plane that's been shot down to the ground
In the grand scheme of it all,
I rip away your hands, beg you to stay,
I feel it so deeply,
My shadow still remains, And I'll reach out towards you.
I feel like I'm floating
Oct 24, 2025
Oct 24, 2025 at 6:42 PM UTC
Harsh Conditions
hibernation is a technique used by many animals, to survive harsh conditions.
this is a complex process, they say- not just a long sleep.
we go further into detail, and we find that we humans share not only anatomical but also physiological similarities with these creatures.
so i can't help but wonder- do animals experience the intense emotional distress as we do, when subjected to change?
if so, what's so controversial about shedding a tear or two over a harsh condition.
Oct 24, 2025
Oct 24, 2025 at 6:36 PM UTC
I don't know how to feel
when i look your way i want to see you
how you once presented
so enchanted by the life you lead
i watched as one by one,
the aspects that once shone a bright purple,
now just radiate behind you,
they seem like they are suffocating you,
following you,
dragging you down.
now i can’t help but feel defeated.
because my sister, my best friend,
once so joyous and palpable,
is now left a shell of what she used to be.
she is unreachable, i can’t reach you.
living in every day fear of what is to come,
trying to ignore the inevitable,
but that is just it. inevitable.
one day you will leave this world,
and i wont blame you.
and i cant blame the things around you.
after all, death is the one thing we are promised in life.
so although i can come to terms with the fact that you are on the cusp of death,
i don't think i will ever be okay with the build-up towards that.
the intense pool of dread that is packaged along with losing you.
my beautiful sister.
Jun 7, 2025
Jun 7, 2025 at 10:49 AM UTC
You are damaged.
You go about life blindly,
hoping to be shielded from the consequences of your own actions.
what made you this way, I ask myself.
I ask myself this despite the shame I feel
In the fact that I know exactly what.
Because I was there, watching, every time.
I was present, but not present at all.
I was listening but not listening at all.
I was scared, but not scared at all.
It’s your pain to claim, not mine.
It’s not mine to feel,
so why do i feel it so deeply.
I’ll shove it down for now,
I’ll offer my shoulder, and tell you it’s okay.
you are okay.
he can’t get you anymore.
you are okay.
am I okay?
Jun 7, 2025
Jun 7, 2025 at 10:32 AM UTC