Among all the poetry books,
I look for the ones with the cracked binding
And intricate covers
Filled with harrowing sadness and raw emotion
The kind that obliterates the souls purity.
Apr 18, 2015
Apr 18, 2015 at 4:32 PM UTC
Maybe its because youre 140 miles away. Maybe its because youre enjoying a break. Maybe its because you just forgot that im here or something.. But whatever it is i keep making excuses because im scared that the reality is that you just dont care. Even though you said we needed to be a team.. You said you loved me. And now you dont say it at all. Its like youre embarrassed or something.. Either way it burns so deeply in the middle of my soul that it feels torturous but im too weak to push you away. Instead i make up excuses and push through because im convinced that im madly in love with you. And maybe im insane for waiting so long.. So patiently.. And hoping so much. But i cant help it. When i am with you. When i do speak to you. Sparks ignite again inside me and give life to such a vivid, passionate and extraordinary fire that just bursts and melts me into you once more. And you drive me mad but i cant put out this firey love i have for you.
Mar 21, 2015
Mar 21, 2015 at 10:22 AM UTC
Anger fumes throughout my body
A silent steam seeping
A quiet girl weeping
My hands are tied
My teeth are clenched
And a smile has been slapped and plastered across my face
I've been told to just go with the flow
To just let it go
But there's a buzzing in my soul
A violent tug and pull
Rattling my bones
Boiling my blood
I feel as if I will explode
But then you bring me back to reality
A gentle touch
That quiets the buzzing, the tugging, the pulling, the rattling, and the boiling
My chest rises, and then falls
A deep breath hisses out between my lips
And only then am I okay
Feb 23, 2015
Feb 23, 2015 at 10:46 AM UTC
You think your parents are invincible
Your father your knight and shining armor
Your mother an untouchable saint
Providing, protecting, and loving you all unconditionally
But one chest pain brings a surreal reality
And you watch your fragile father lie on the hospital bed, crying
And you see your mother fighting back tears, trying to be the strong one
Your invincible parents now crumbling in front of you
Shaken and terror stricken, tears flood your eyes
You don't ever think your dad, the one who wiped your tears when you had a bad break up
Could be so fragile
He is supposed to be the big tough guy who is invincible
Not the one to get a heart attack at fourty three
Lucky, they said, your dad is lucky he survived.
Dec 16, 2014
Dec 16, 2014 at 11:17 PM UTC
It's amazing how a dream can influence feelings
A dam broken by a flood of them
A fleeting moment where your heart is clenched by an iron fist of exasperation
Tears become the mask you wear as you watch your heart being wretched out of your chest
The taste of hot heavy metal floods your throat as you bite your tongue
Because you're trying to keep from lying to yourself that you're "over it"
But God, it felt so real;
His arms wrapped around your body, squeezing.
Piercing eyes don't blink, when he is uttering I love you
Caught in between the realms of a dream or a reality
Torturing yourself with these exhilarating feelings
Grasping at all opportunities to feel good
But realizing you only feel good because of him
And you are trying to forget the fire from his burning kisses
That singed at your raw lips
You are screaming due to the electric shock pulsing at each point on your body touched by him
Trying to digest the raging adrenaline that is burning every single one of your veins
Praying to slip into a nirvana of ecstasy
You are caught in a whirl wind of what you thought was bliss
But then awoken by the erratic screams of your alarm
It was all just a dream.
Hannah Brown©
Oct 28, 2014
Oct 28, 2014 at 8:07 PM UTC
Remembering
Eyes gleaming tears streaming
Cheeks rosy due to so much anger
You kissing me your lips tasted like cigarettes
Sparks flew due to the cancer stick you just lit
I love you you love your drugs
how will I ever win
Oct 17, 2014
Oct 17, 2014 at 1:49 PM UTC
Because I craved him when he was far,
I loathed him when his skin was inches from mine.
Because when his presence was absent I filled my head with dreams of him,
I thought of the danger he could do when his skin was inches from mine.
Because my heart beat started to race everytime I saw him and he didn't see me,
I remembered when he did see me when his skin was inches from mine.
Because I wanted to kiss him oh so badly,
I was repulsed just as his lips where close and when his skin was inches from mine.
Because I wanted him to ask me to be his girlfriend,
I started to cry as he looked in my eyes when his skin was inches from mine.
Because I didn't want to be scared of loving him any longer,
I ran away when his skin was inches from mine.
Hannah Marie ©
Sep 6, 2014
Sep 6, 2014 at 12:23 AM UTC
TO WATCH SOMEONE YOU LOVE CHEST RISING AND FALLING IN AN ANGRY MANNER WITH SO MUCH HATE
TO WATCH THEM TAKE ALL THEIR HURT OUT ON THEMSELVES TO TRY TO "PROVE SOMETHING"
TO WHO!? FOR YOU ARE ONLY THE DEVILS BAIT
MY LOVE, I TELL YOU ONCE MORE YOU ARE NOT NOTHING BUT RATHER EVERYTHING
I WATCH YOU TRAPPED IN THIS UNRULY CAGE OF ANGUISHING UNHAPPIENESS
I QUESTION WHETHER OR NOT WE ARE ALLOWED TO LIVE OR TO BE LIVED IN
BECAUSE SOME OF US CARRY SO MUCH SADNESS..
THAT WE LET SOMETHING ELSE LIVE INSIDE US SO DARK AND RUTHLESS, FOR THAT FELT LIKE A HEAVY SIN
DIDNT IT?
AS YOUR RIB CAGE IS WRETCHED OPEN BY THIS CREATURE
TRYING TO LIVE ON ITS OWN, YOU SHOVE IT BACK INSIDE YOU BECAUSE WITH OUT IT
YOU ARE NOTHING, SO YOU LET YOURSELF DOWN BECAUSE ITS ALL YOU CAN DO
Aug 23, 2014
Aug 23, 2014 at 8:47 AM UTC
There are a lot of things wrong..
With the way you make me feel
You make me feel like I'm taking acid
I start to feel dizzy and like I'm shooting over the clouds
Because you called me cute...
But then you take 96 hours, 27 minutes and 34 seconds to reply to a text message or phone call I left to you
I worry. And that acid trip starts to plummet and I feel like I am falling
Extremely fast. And the second I'm about to hit the ground. You're suddenly back.
And I am planted softly on the ground
In a daze. But then you're gone again.
Then. 5 months, 2 weeks, 7 hours, 52 minutes, and 8 seconds later. You finally start talking to me again.
Apologizing for breaking my heart.
For literally taking my heart and squeezing it. With the blood oozing out and my heart deflating and it literally feels like my heart has been seized out of my chest into the palm of your hand but some how I can literally feel you hurt my heart
And that very pain sends electric shocks to my brain. And I'm blacked out mentally until you "apologize"
And the dopamine in my body starts to spike and I trick myself into thinking. "Yes. It's all going back to normal, we aren't crazy" "we aren't crazy"
Yes we are
You make me feel like I will die without you. If I can't have your existence present to me. I am literally a bomb full of depression. Ready to implode into myself at any given moment.
You crush my desires into fine dust and set them in a line and snort them so you can watch me crumble to nothingness. You take my happiness with a needle and shoot it through your own veins. You take my love and put it in empty pill capsules and pop them whenever you're lonely. And you literally leave me with nothing but sadness.
You literally abuse me like I'm some sort of drug machine. Whenever you need it. I've seem to always have it.
There are a lot of things wrong with the way you make me feel.
But what is really wrong, and disturbing..
I still love every. Single. Piece of you.
May 28, 2014
May 28, 2014 at 11:53 PM UTC
I breathe deeply
Everything's a game now a days
No one loves steeply
No one actually stays
You get what you need and you leave
It's like ******* the nicotine quickly out of your **** cigarette
I mean isn't that what we're taught to believe
(haha)
Taught that using someone shouldn't be something we regret
What happened to us.
Exactly two years and 264 days ago
We were not in lust.
You wouldn't have stooped this ******* low
Now you're burning into my skull
You're something I hate but want to love
And I'm in awe with the **** that you pull
In ongoing mental traffic, let me give you a helpful shove
You want me to show you my body
You don't even tell me you love me anymore
I'm no longer your somebody
Literally you've shut me out, slammed the door
What even am I to you now?
A ****** dim light that keeps flickering in the back of your mind.
And I'm managing somehow
Attempting to scrape the insides of your ******* mind
But you still treat me like ****
Like this poem I put too much effort into
It's pathetic
So **** it
Mar 2, 2014
Mar 2, 2014 at 11:10 PM UTC