I don't know
What you did
But I don't
Like it not
In one single
Bit it's gnawing
At me that
I don't know
The answers to
Anything or everything
And that it
Makes me nervous
And shaky when
You're around and
I don't like
That, but there
You are sitting
Tall and proud
And like a
King upon his
Merry throne of
Gold and silver
Other people see
How you light
Up too so
I don't think
I'm too awfully
oh-so-special
But I overthink
The words you
Say every single
******* day.
I didn't mean
To sound so
Stupid or rude
The other day
It's just we
Met over a
Book of fate
And you stepped
Out of your
Car the same
Exact time I
Did mine when
We were all
Alone and when
Everyone had left
You asked what
I was doing
Now, but I'm
Not too smart
So I just
Said 'going home.'
And turned away.
Dec 20, 2014
Dec 20, 2014 at 11:04 PM UTC
It's a mistake
It's a crude
Crude mistake of
Me to let
Myself talk to
You again when
I'm sure of
Why I stopped
On day one
You make me
Nervous with your
Passion it's not
An angry within
You but just
Sweet sorrow that
I can't understand
I don't know
Why you would
See me so
Tenderly and sweet
When I've been
Cold and brash
Abrasive and rash
With my words
To you just
Out of fear
And general distaste
For the emotion.
Dec 20, 2014
Dec 20, 2014 at 10:47 PM UTC
I want to hide away
And I know that's what we
All tend to say
I'm not different, neither are you
Home is just around
The corner inside your temple
But I'll wear the crown
In this house
Nov 26, 2014
Nov 26, 2014 at 4:15 PM UTC
I wanna cut out my tongue
With my own words
When they spill out in
Whispers to myself with
Not a soul around
I'm at the top of the
Underground world of this
Trying to clime out from
The abyss, looking back
Looking back
And it stares into me
Nov 18, 2014
Nov 18, 2014 at 6:33 PM UTC
Hanging with all the
Unloved kids
Lunch at nine with the
Straight edge
Don't you remember
Remember when it used
To be sunburns and bike rides
Too
I've held my breath with
Every little step
On the shards of the past
But everything seems to get a
Little smaller with every time
You frown
So now I'm
Hanging with all the
Unloved kids
Lunch tonight with the
Straight edge
And I don't know who to believe
In the battle
But everyone seems
A little too chill
With me drowning in my
Own spill
And I know its my
Fault and I know it's
Undoing the ties we shared so
Long, long ago
But I've just got to
Hang with all the
Unloved kids
Skip lunch at nine with the
Straight edge
Oct 28, 2014
Oct 28, 2014 at 5:35 PM UTC
We're not the clean cut
Kids in the back bus
Nike socks pulled way up
Football lights shining in us
No
I wanna stay up till three
Head down, slumped under
Water and face in the
Glitter and grim before
Yes
We'll undress into our skin
And show how to hold
Another drink of tea when wishing
The world could hold us warm
No
And I hate reality
But I really love those pictures
Of you looking so sharp and smoking
Sweet smells of fall, and our birth
Into winter
Yeah
I want to head back to
Amsterdam, London, New York, Paris
For some solace but even those
Safe havens haven't seen my face in weeks
Nah
So should I go back now
Before it's all over, and I'd like
To die again today, tomorrow
There's not another day left
For me to cry over my own mistakes
And downfalls, but I'll thank all the
Invisible humans today, and tomorrow
For now.
Oct 12, 2014
Oct 12, 2014 at 9:08 PM UTC
This is bone crushing
And I'm falling through
The tiny cracks that
Everyone else seems to
Just avoid, and everyone
Is so ahead, but I'm falling
And falling, and sobbing
Into the feathers of my
Griffin who hasn't woken
In five days, and I get
A little bit worried
Sometimes about
What's going to pop up
Next, and if I can make
It from one end of the walkway
To the other.
Oct 1, 2014
Oct 1, 2014 at 8:28 PM UTC
Filling me up with thoughts
That don't mean too much
Of anything is just a pastime
Of yours, and honestly I'm a little
Bored of this sad charade.
I'd like to feel something
On my very, very own
Just for once, to see if maybe
I'm not such an android
I want to see my own
Soul laid bare for another
Human, and maybe theirs
Splayed out like wet clothes
On a string blowing in the
Soft summer breeze for
Only me to see.
Sep 29, 2014
Sep 29, 2014 at 9:22 PM UTC
Everything tells me not to worry
There is not a thing wrong with you
You're wired a little differently
It gets better
I have to remind myself daily
Only in Holland could the words of truth
Come out to the world
To people I'll never see again
And maybe it's better that way and
Maybe I'm not what I think I am
But that's okay, and it's okay to not
Know, but right now I need to
Breathe, and breathe, and know
That everything will be alight
It has to get better
I have to know that the end will pan out
I won't lose the few friends I've captured
In my hold or the people I hold so dear
They seem so clueless, but then
Maybe not
It'll get better.
Jul 28, 2014
Jul 28, 2014 at 3:04 AM UTC
I know what you'r thinking. Oh, I can't believe that little girl did that; she was so sweet, I wonder what went wrong, blah, blah blah... I can see it in your eyes. high-pitched laughter. Yes, I killed those girls. But they deserved it. They had gifts. The actress, the singer, the model, the dancer, the painter, the musician, and the writer. They were all so talented. And they didn't appreciate any of it! They took all of it for granted!!! Now, now look at me. I'm nothing compared to them. A good singer, but never the best. Pretty, but never the prettiest. Smart, but never the smartest! I was doing them a favor. I was doing everyone a favor!
But by doing this. I'm finally good at something. I'm finally known for something. I won't call this a gift that I take for granted. I won't be like those girls. I don't take this granted. pause But wait, I'm not done yet, I would like to request to go on with my story, and reasons, and I would also request you wipe that look off your face. I'm not crazy. I was just jealous, and sad, and angry.
Now, I won't go into details about each of their similar, tragically beautiful demises, I would imagine you already know how that all went. I just need to know that you know that I was doing something for the good of everyone. Hell, this was for the good of the world. It's just like anything anyone else would do. Just to make a statement. Isn't that why people do anything anymore?
Hey! Where are you going?! You can't walk away just because you're disgusted! You can't try to make yourself different from me!!!
Jul 28, 2014
Jul 28, 2014 at 2:40 AM UTC