smudge - Hello Poetry

I am sleepy, so so sleepy. But sleep does not come to me. My head is buzzing but when I try I am unable to find what is causing this noise within me. We are weird. We are good. We are amazing. We are on cloud nine. We are ready for everything. Life is exciting. It's motivating. It's not HappeningFastEnough. It moves me in its divine We are weird. Wait. Am I weird? Life stills....... I am sleepy but the noise.... I wanted to scrawl this noise away. But When I try to listen all I hear is .... tick tock, I should be sleeping. Tick tock All I hear..... Is my clock.

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Oct 8, 2020

Oct 8, 2020 at 1:26 PM UTC

Tick tock

I am sleepy, so so sleepy. But sleep does not come to me. My head is buzzing but when I try I am unable to find what is causing this noise within me. We are weird. We are good. We are amazing. We are on cloud nine. We are ready for everything. Life is exciting. It's motivating. It's not HappeningFastEnough. It moves me in its divine We are weird. Wait. Am I weird? Life stills....... I am sleepy but the noise.... I wanted to scrawl this noise away. But When I try to listen all I hear is .... tick tock, I should be sleeping. Tick tock All I hear..... Is my clock.

24

I need this and I need that! Do you though? Or, do you just want it? I should do this and I should do that! No! You. Could. Do. It. All. If you start to replace "need" with "want" And "should" with "could" You will begin to recognise that everything is just a choice and that choice, Lies. Soley. Within. You.

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Oct 7, 2020

Oct 7, 2020 at 4:39 PM UTC

It's all just a choice

I need this and I need that! Do you though? Or, do you just want it? I should do this and I should do that! No! You. Could. Do. It. All. If you start to replace "need" with "want" And "should" with "could" You will begin to recognise that everything is just a choice and that choice, Lies. Soley. Within. You.

11

I had travelled for so long.....too long some may say Hunting for the lost piece of the puzzle that before me lay Love - it was always there, Laughter it was never far, Copious bright imprints snuggled sweetly to my chest, Two peas in a pod - A pod that I secretly knew was the best. Pieces went missing? Pieces felt misfitting? Then: You cared far more for freedom, You cared far more for money, more money, You cared far more about the opinions of those that don't care much at all, You cared far more about the substances that fooled you to believe that all it wanted was to help I wanted to help - Me, You lied and lied again When all I wanted Was the truth When all I Needed Was the truth You say: Your reflection is distorted now? Your eyes are unsure You feel walls at every angle And This is what you feel you must endure? You no longer saw who I saw and I couldn't understand why. You were my favourite person one of the nicest I knew You had been my home for so long. I became exhausted I became tearful I became scared I became so worried about you that I forgot all about me I forgot about everything else that was worth worrying over in this beautiful world. I Had to surrender. because I couldn't answer any of the why's that clung So badly To how we ended up on this path. I just couldn't solve it - my god I tried and tried again. But, the pieces - they just wouldn't fit. I never wanted to, but I let you go As excruciating as this was, it was the only thing left to do. I let you go I miss you I don't though miss The tears The arguements The disappointment The worry The uncertainty The fear I cradled whenever I dared to hope But I do miss you I see sparkles of you every so often and I remember all the love that once connected us so securely - with a sad smile on my face. I now accept that there was no helping you to make choices that would've brought you happiness - as it was a happiness you felt unworthy of. Nor could I have helped you to love yourself like I did - you knew what I was yet to find out. I now understand - guilt can steal a good heart.

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May 27, 2018

May 27, 2018 at 6:29 PM UTC

The Puzzle #solved!

I had travelled for so long.....too long some may say Hunting for the lost piece of the puzzle that before me lay Love - it was always there, Laughter it was never far, Copious bright imprints snuggled sweetly to my chest, Two peas in a pod - A pod that I secretly knew was the best. Pieces went missing? Pieces felt misfitting? Then: You cared far more for freedom, You cared far more for money, more money, You cared far more about the opinions of those that don't care much at all, You cared far more about the substances that fooled you to believe that all it wanted was to help I wanted to help - Me, You lied and lied again When all I wanted Was the truth When all I Needed Was the truth You say: Your reflection is distorted now? Your eyes are unsure You feel walls at every angle And This is what you feel you must endure? You no longer saw who I saw and I couldn't understand why. You were my favourite person one of the nicest I knew You had been my home for so long. I became exhausted I became tearful I became scared I became so worried about you that I forgot all about me I forgot about everything else that was worth worrying over in this beautiful world. I Had to surrender. because I couldn't answer any of the why's that clung So badly To how we ended up on this path. I just couldn't solve it - my god I tried and tried again. But, the pieces - they just wouldn't fit. I never wanted to, but I let you go As excruciating as this was, it was the only thing left to do. I let you go I miss you I don't though miss The tears The arguements The disappointment The worry The uncertainty The fear I cradled whenever I dared to hope But I do miss you I see sparkles of you every so often and I remember all the love that once connected us so securely - with a sad smile on my face. I now accept that there was no helping you to make choices that would've brought you happiness - as it was a happiness you felt unworthy of. Nor could I have helped you to love yourself like I did - you knew what I was yet to find out. I now understand - guilt can steal a good heart.

58

They say "you'll find a better love" They say "you'll find someone who is better suited - more like you" They say "he doesn't deserve you" They say "this agony will pass" But I never thought there was a "better" love out there, in my eyes I had the best there could be? I never thought about fitting together with anyone else, we were like chalk and cheese but happy chalk and cheese - he was my home, in my eyes no-one else could ever be more fitting? I never looked at it as deserving me, in my eyes we were just meant to be, he was always meant to be mine and I, his? I never ever thought he would put me in so much agony that I would ever have to wonder if it will pass, in my eyes he loved me? I now realise, he stole my eyes, But Part of me wants to give them back, so that I can feel sure again as to what I want.......but I can't want him?

0

May 27, 2018

May 27, 2018 at 6:09 PM UTC

In my Eyes

They say "you'll find a better love" They say "you'll find someone who is better suited - more like you" They say "he doesn't deserve you" They say "this agony will pass" But I never thought there was a "better" love out there, in my eyes I had the best there could be? I never thought about fitting together with anyone else, we were like chalk and cheese but happy chalk and cheese - he was my home, in my eyes no-one else could ever be more fitting? I never looked at it as deserving me, in my eyes we were just meant to be, he was always meant to be mine and I, his? I never ever thought he would put me in so much agony that I would ever have to wonder if it will pass, in my eyes he loved me? I now realise, he stole my eyes, But Part of me wants to give them back, so that I can feel sure again as to what I want.......but I can't want him?

13

I blamed the universe... Before I blamed you. You held a blindfold over my eyes with tears in it; allowed me to sight only part of the scene before me. I blamed the trees with the burnt branches; they bent ever so slightly to tickle you and lure you out to play. I blamed your tribe; they put you on a pedastal, a pedastal that did not stay still for you to lay. I blamed the leaves and the salt; they coerced you to mould into someone Unknown to me. Unknown to you. I blamed myself; as I knew the blade would not go as deep as it would, if I Confessed to blaming you. But In the end..... You made the choices that brought a shard of glass down upon our ties. I say you blindfolded me... But in reality I know, it was me, me holding that blindfold....allowing you to recite all those lies. If only I knew how colourful the world could be without it obstructing my view. Red and yellow and pink and green Purple and orange and blue....... I can now sing a rainbow, Sing a rainbow, Sing a rainbow too.

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Feb 23, 2018

Feb 23, 2018 at 5:27 PM UTC

Blame

I blamed the universe... Before I blamed you. You held a blindfold over my eyes with tears in it; allowed me to sight only part of the scene before me. I blamed the trees with the burnt branches; they bent ever so slightly to tickle you and lure you out to play. I blamed your tribe; they put you on a pedastal, a pedastal that did not stay still for you to lay. I blamed the leaves and the salt; they coerced you to mould into someone Unknown to me. Unknown to you. I blamed myself; as I knew the blade would not go as deep as it would, if I Confessed to blaming you. But In the end..... You made the choices that brought a shard of glass down upon our ties. I say you blindfolded me... But in reality I know, it was me, me holding that blindfold....allowing you to recite all those lies. If only I knew how colourful the world could be without it obstructing my view. Red and yellow and pink and green Purple and orange and blue....... I can now sing a rainbow, Sing a rainbow, Sing a rainbow too.

17

They smile, you smile, They laugh, you can't not, Their eyes light up when they see you, It melts your heart, It stops your thoughts, It tickles your soul. They cry, you guard, you nuture, you kiss better, you tell them the pain won't last. They are so generous. They gift you love, They gift you joy, They lighten your world, They make everything worth while, And this is just when they smile. You teach them right from wrong, You teach them numbers and colours, You teach them, It's OK to cry, It's OK to be mad, It's OK to be tired or frustrated, Let the emotions come but ensure they remember, It's OK to let them go. They will challenge you, They will teach you just how strong You Truly are. They are the Ultimate 24/7, They are so Precious

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Jan 24, 2018

Jan 24, 2018 at 6:22 PM UTC

Precious

They smile, you smile, They laugh, you can't not, Their eyes light up when they see you, It melts your heart, It stops your thoughts, It tickles your soul. They cry, you guard, you nuture, you kiss better, you tell them the pain won't last. They are so generous. They gift you love, They gift you joy, They lighten your world, They make everything worth while, And this is just when they smile. You teach them right from wrong, You teach them numbers and colours, You teach them, It's OK to cry, It's OK to be mad, It's OK to be tired or frustrated, Let the emotions come but ensure they remember, It's OK to let them go. They will challenge you, They will teach you just how strong You Truly are. They are the Ultimate 24/7, They are so Precious

25

Dislike faded to friendship and grew to a love, I never knew existed. If only, I knew, it was always tainted.

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Dec 20, 2017

Dec 20, 2017 at 2:43 PM UTC

Lies.

Dislike faded to friendship and grew to a love, I never knew existed. If only, I knew, it was always tainted.

2

A micro glint in a darkened Universe, Or A blazing fire in well lit room, Always present.

0

Aug 28, 2017

Aug 28, 2017 at 9:13 AM UTC

Hope

A micro glint in a darkened Universe, Or A blazing fire in well lit room, Always present.

8

Love is the feeling of happiness you get when you see them smile, It Beams, No matter what, but more so when you know you are the cause, Love is the feeling of devastation you get when you see them hurt It Kills, No matter what, but even more so when you know that you are the cause, Love is Hope It's Faith It's Justice It's Charity It's Courage It's Prudence It's Temperence Love is wanting them, Love is needing them, Love is staying, Even when it hurts you more than words can say, Love is Lust Its Envy It's sloth It's Pride It's Greed It's Wrath It's Gluttony Love is a drug, It's everything, but it can quite easily leave you with nothing, Love with caution - its not always a balance of sin and virtue.

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Aug 27, 2017

Aug 27, 2017 at 5:29 PM UTC

What is Love?

Love is the feeling of happiness you get when you see them smile, It Beams, No matter what, but more so when you know you are the cause, Love is the feeling of devastation you get when you see them hurt It Kills, No matter what, but even more so when you know that you are the cause, Love is Hope It's Faith It's Justice It's Charity It's Courage It's Prudence It's Temperence Love is wanting them, Love is needing them, Love is staying, Even when it hurts you more than words can say, Love is Lust Its Envy It's sloth It's Pride It's Greed It's Wrath It's Gluttony Love is a drug, It's everything, but it can quite easily leave you with nothing, Love with caution - its not always a balance of sin and virtue.

27

It will all be fine, It's just a line..... 20 minutes of WOW, Worries gone, Nothing else matters, Good feeling goes Runny nose Hours of chasing Heart-beat racing Broken trust Comedown on Paying is a must Money gone Next day wasted Lack of sleep Insides contaminated Happy place no more for keeps It's never fine, Because it's never JUST a line.

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Aug 22, 2017

Aug 22, 2017 at 2:56 AM UTC

Just a Line

It will all be fine, It's just a line..... 20 minutes of WOW, Worries gone, Nothing else matters, Good feeling goes Runny nose Hours of chasing Heart-beat racing Broken trust Comedown on Paying is a must Money gone Next day wasted Lack of sleep Insides contaminated Happy place no more for keeps It's never fine, Because it's never JUST a line.

19