Isn’t weird
How you can sleep with someone
And lay your head on their chest
Been so close to their heart
But never owning even the smallest piece of it
Jan 11, 2018
Jan 11, 2018 at 7:54 PM UTC
I wish we could go back years ago, to those days when you were a puppy a young healthy energetic non-diabetic puppy
When we play with your mom
She passed away years ago, but every time y think of her it hurts all over again
It take me back to that exact moment i run to my bedroom crying and start to drown myself in tears, nothing could ever replace her maternal feeling and the protection she will have died to give me
People might be thinking this is so stupid you are talking about a dog
But they will say that cause they just don't understand, they can't understand how it feels, how i felt
And now watching you so proudly, you learn everything we thought you
You learn to recognize my smell, my voice, my crying sounds and you sit beside my window just in case i needed you, just in case i need to look at those shiny full of hope beautiful eyes that you have
I used to think that fatness was a sing of healthiness, at least in you, you always looked so happy fat and adorable, now im watching you get skinnier and weaker every day and its just hurt so much when i look at you and your getting older but at the same time always seeing that young and wild puppy that i saw the firt time.
We grow up together, your mom was like our mom and i see you like a sister but at the same time like my baby that i have to protect.
I really wish I'm doing it well, I'm new at this, it is really making me stronger, your knew I always wanted to be a doctor and now I'm practicing because i have to inject the insulin every 12 hour and then give you your special food, and put that cream on your left leg, and after I finished all that i sit and look at your eyes and see then turning blue, and start to realize that you will be dying soon and there's nothing I could do about it
You are going to die and the only thing i can do is think about how much I'm going to miss you when your gone but at least you will be resting in peace and i will be getting stronger
Today was a normal day, we cleaned the house and make lunch, then we took you to get clean and I went to the hairdresser.
I was coming back home and hearing the radio with mom, suddenly she received a call, her face changed completely, she looks at me as i ask what happened and tells me that you are gone, that your little heart couldn't handle it anymore and that you are no longer alive
I stay quiet for a minute or two, and I started asking questions with what i had of voice between my sobbing
When I got home I could barely got out of the car, and when I did the house already felt extremely empty without you saying welcome back! And smelling us while moving your tale with some much happiness
You waited for me for four months and i will never be more thankful for that cause i got to say goodbye
I now you got through so much, every single problem you riced above, you were blind and somehow managed to live incredibly
I love you so much and i have no idea how will I managed to live without you, What do you do with all the love in the world you were willing to give, how do you keep going when the thing that kept you going is gone?
This day didn't went as I imagine and life will never be the same, this house will always be a little bit emptier, my smile will always be a little bit fake and my heart will always have a little hole were you will always live with me
Jan 16, 2017
Jan 16, 2017 at 11:45 PM UTC
I feel like everyone hates me
But i know they could never hate me as much as i do
And i can't help it idk what to do to love myself but i just can't i just hate me too much to ever even accept i have to be in this body for the rest of my life... would it help if i make it shorter?
Dec 13, 2016
Dec 13, 2016 at 5:56 PM UTC
I don't like the life that I'm living
I don't like the person that I'm being
I don't like the people that surround me
I don't like the way they used to judge me
So I run away
To these new beautiful city
Were everyone is dead
So it doesn't matter anymore
And I don't really care
The people that were bad with me
I can see them crying now
I can see them suffer
I like it when they suffer
I make them suffer
And i love it
And I'm killing them all
What? You thought the city was heaven?
People who suicide don't go to heaven
I'm an angel now
The angel of death
I'm the ***** of satanas you ********
Mar 9, 2016
Mar 9, 2016 at 10:33 PM UTC
I was just hanging there
Thinking about you
And a tear felt down my face
It didn't feel warm
It wasn't cold either
It was nothing
It didn't even hurt anymore
I can't feel nothing
It's just that nothing make me feel alive anymore
Maybe I'm not
Maybe I shouldn't be
That's when I decide
That it was over
That's when I decide
To **** myself
To die
Feb 29, 2016
Feb 29, 2016 at 2:36 PM UTC
Mommy, the monster under my bed enter in my head
Now they are telling me to do bad things
And somehow, I want to
Feb 24, 2016
Feb 24, 2016 at 1:57 PM UTC
We are all diferent people with different though
But in point of our lifes
We all suffer through staff that makes us strong, make us equals
Feb 14, 2016
Feb 14, 2016 at 11:55 PM UTC
We are all lost stars
Trying to light up the sky
Or maybe
Just our life's
Feb 14, 2016
Feb 14, 2016 at 11:46 PM UTC
Lost and all alone.
I always thought that I could make it on my own.
But since you left I hardly make it through the day.
My tears get in the way and I need you back to stay.
I wander through the night
And search the world to find the words to make it right.
All I want is just the way it used to be
With you here close to me.
And I've got to make you see,
That I'm lost without your love.
Life without you isn't worth the trouble of.
And I'm as helpless as a ship without a wheel,
A touch without a feel.
I can't believe its real.
And someday soon I'll wake
And find my heart won't have to break.
Yes, I'm lost without your love.
Life without you isn't worth the trouble of.
All I want is the way it used to be
I need you here with me.
Oh darling can't you see,
If we had love before,
We can have it back once more
Feb 11, 2016
Feb 11, 2016 at 6:10 PM UTC
You sheltered me from harm.
Kept me warm, kept me warm.
You gave my life to me.
Set me free, set me free.
The finest years I ever knew,
Were all the years I had with you.
And I would give anything I own.
I'd give up my life, my heart, my home.
I would give everything I own,
Just to have you back again.
You taught me how to laugh.
What a time, what a time.
You never said too much,
But still you showed the way
And I knew from watching you.
Nobody else could ever know,
The part of me that can't let go.
And I would give anything I own,
I'd give up my life, my heart, my home.
I would give everything I own,
Just to have you back again.
Is there someone you know,
Your loving them so,
But taking them all for granted?
You may lose them one day.
Someone takes them away,
And they don't hear the words you long to say.
I would give anything I own,
I'd give up my life, my heart, my home.
I would give everything I own,
Just to have you back again;
Just to touch you once again.
Feb 11, 2016
Feb 11, 2016 at 5:40 PM UTC