they talk to me,
think i'm listening.
but really, i am swallowing
words of self-hatred.
my heart beats but
there is no sound.
my pulse is felt,
but no life.
when i look in
the mirror,
i see a lot of things,
but none of them are me.
i am trapped inside
my own body,
i yearn to get out.
people think i am
breathing, but no,
i choke.
Mar 24, 2016
Mar 24, 2016 at 5:18 AM UTC
*if you stripped naked my soul,
you'll find her,
running through my veins,
like my blood, a part of me.
my tongue can't get
those words out,
i can't tell you how
crazy i am in love.
my heart,
it breaks
every single time she
talks about her.
the glitter in her eyes
at the mention of her name,
i wished that shine
belonged to me.
but it doesn't.
there is no remedy
for the madness
i bestow,
they can chain me up
but there is no point.
because it's my heart that needs caging.*
Feb 11, 2016
Feb 11, 2016 at 2:26 AM UTC
*regrets
satisfaction
leave it all behind.
madness
sanity
leave it all behind.
sadness
happiness
leave it all behind.
in your book of life
this year,
begin page 1 of 366,
not with a comma
or with a full stop.
but with a question mark,
preparing yourself
for what is to come.
beauty in nightmares
or nightmares in beauty.*
Jan 1, 2016
Jan 1, 2016 at 12:06 AM UTC
*sometimes it engulfed me,
sometimes I lost myself,
but it was my best friend.
sometimes I looked in the mirror,
and it was all I saw,
I wished to sleep in comfort,
but I could never escape its claws.
it followed me when I was happy
it was my shadow when I was sad,
sometimes it hurt me,
but seldom was I mad.
all I dreamt of now
was me at the end of a gun.
but maybe it wasn't a dream,
maybe it was all real,
because I felt dead inside,
not knowing how to feel.
I loved it, my best friend,
with all I could feel,
my blood dripped for it,
but it could never love me.*
Dec 30, 2015
Dec 30, 2015 at 9:40 AM UTC
*I have felt butterflies in my stomach,
I have found it hard to get my words out,
I have blushed at the smile your red lips flashed.
I have seen you when I gaze into the night sky,
formed constellations with your words.
I've always dreamed of what it'd be like
to love one another, seeing no flaws,
to feel electric every time we touched.
I've always dreamed of seeing the day,
when we stand together,
hand in hand in my balcony,
and you say what an amazing view.
and I look at you and say,
what an amazing view
not just think to myself,
like I usually do.
I've always dreamed of seeing the day,
when I can love you,
and you, I,
without being given ***** looks.
for love is not measured by gender,
a girl can love a girl,
a boy can love a boy.
I always have and will continue to dream
of seeing the day when
love truly triumphs.*
Dec 28, 2015
Dec 28, 2015 at 10:41 AM UTC
*barren lands and
leaves falling down;
a life of broken dreams.*
Dec 4, 2015
Dec 4, 2015 at 9:09 AM UTC
*the ship of her thoughts,
was drifting away,
into the sea of darkness;
but along that way,
it got stuck,
in the whirlpool of sadness
— and it drowned.*
Nov 28, 2015
Nov 28, 2015 at 4:45 AM UTC
*I walk through fields of grass so green,
my eyes blinded by the sun's golden sheen,
the morning breeze kisses my feet,
the sounds of nature play their own beat.
as I walk through the scene, I spot someone
it is a beautiful woman,
she's there and then she isn't, playing hide and seek,
with radiant eyes and rosy cheeks.
I run around and finally find her,
tears in her eyes and lost are the smiles that once were,
there is blood on her clothes, her once beautiful face
is now mere patches of skin that none can erase.
she cries and cries till she bleeds from her very mouth
then asks me for help, hands stretched out
all my attempts at helping her fail
she is still crying, turning more and more pale.
she cries till her voice starts hurting my ears,
I can feel the blood oozing out of my ears,
her hand is still stretched out, waiting for the warmth of another,
her voice pierces through me, I shudder.
parts of me are now breaking,
the frequency of her voice is taking
away life from inside of me,
but what is that? I see a smile spread across her cheek.
she smiles while I struggle to stand,
she smiles while I feel my body drown in the sand,
my eyes shut and I fall into the whirlpool of sand below me
and then she laughs, humming a sweet melody.*
Nov 27, 2015
Nov 27, 2015 at 12:00 PM UTC
*feed me poison,
watch me die,
savour while I struggle.
stab me with knives,
hear me cry,
make my screams your favourite song.
cut me up,
bleed me dry,
swim in my tears.
let me go through hell,
in beds of fire, lie
make castles of my ashes.
leave me behind,
and say goodbye,
carry with you a piece of me.
but please.. don't say you love me
only to lie.*
Nov 25, 2015
Nov 25, 2015 at 11:41 AM UTC