scarredwarrior - Hello Poetry

i remember comfort all through my body but then this pain... it was this horrible pain in my stomach but i could push it away enough to give him my soul. it was what he wanted, right? telling myself i had some part of him was delusional, he only gave me a character he created. but i took it, no questions asked. he claimed to buy me, but he only rented me. looking back, i realize the pain was a warning. because he was a predator and i, his prey, but he took my innocence and still wanted to pray. i didn't ever ever ever think he was taking my being, but then i was no longer whole. and now i know.

0

Mar 10, 2015

Mar 10, 2015 at 11:55 AM UTC

when he took my innocence

i remember comfort all through my body but then this pain... it was this horrible pain in my stomach but i could push it away enough to give him my soul. it was what he wanted, right? telling myself i had some part of him was delusional, he only gave me a character he created. but i took it, no questions asked. he claimed to buy me, but he only rented me. looking back, i realize the pain was a warning. because he was a predator and i, his prey, but he took my innocence and still wanted to pray. i didn't ever ever ever think he was taking my being, but then i was no longer whole. and now i know.

14

anger. i write with tears in my eyes because i am angry to be proven right. when i am forbade from sharing my poetry, proving me right of the times when i said NOBODY CARES, i am so angry that there are tears in my eyes. i'm going to make you read this and you are going to look at me and say nothing. you never say anything except 'ok' and you can't see it but that's so FRUSTRATING. do i only deserve two letters from you? all the times you've said in few words that i was wrong when i said you don't care about me, that nobody does, you were lying. i should have known better. the explanation for my tears? you, and her.

0

Mar 10, 2015

Mar 10, 2015 at 11:46 AM UTC

the explanation for my tears-

anger. i write with tears in my eyes because i am angry to be proven right. when i am forbade from sharing my poetry, proving me right of the times when i said NOBODY CARES, i am so angry that there are tears in my eyes. i'm going to make you read this and you are going to look at me and say nothing. you never say anything except 'ok' and you can't see it but that's so FRUSTRATING. do i only deserve two letters from you? all the times you've said in few words that i was wrong when i said you don't care about me, that nobody does, you were lying. i should have known better. the explanation for my tears? you, and her.

1

if ever there is a time when i don't love you, the world must be ending, and the stars must be exploding in on themselves to fall onto the long lost lovers who turned on one another to slit each others throats. and even then, i will still love you. when you try to **** me, i will still love you. when i am gone, i will still love you. when you have become a memory, and i have become even less than that, i will still love you. if ever there is a time when i don't love you, i will love you.

0

Feb 13, 2015

Feb 13, 2015 at 8:39 AM UTC

if ever there is a time

if ever there is a time when i don't love you, the world must be ending, and the stars must be exploding in on themselves to fall onto the long lost lovers who turned on one another to slit each others throats. and even then, i will still love you. when you try to **** me, i will still love you. when i am gone, i will still love you. when you have become a memory, and i have become even less than that, i will still love you. if ever there is a time when i don't love you, i will love you.

1

i have merely created a home for you in my bones and, even in my ribcage you play peek a boo and kiss my lungs. i don't love you, i just want to absorb you into my veins, and our veins will tie together until i'm secured safely in my body. i don't love you, i have just built myself around you and in you and resembling you. i don't love you, my existence just counts on you. i don't love you but i do. just a little. or enough to live.

0

Jan 12, 2015

Jan 12, 2015 at 11:45 AM UTC

i don't love you

i have merely created a home for you in my bones and, even in my ribcage you play peek a boo and kiss my lungs. i don't love you, i just want to absorb you into my veins, and our veins will tie together until i'm secured safely in my body. i don't love you, i have just built myself around you and in you and resembling you. i don't love you, my existence just counts on you. i don't love you but i do. just a little. or enough to live.

1

Set me free, oh, gravity, I cannot stay here, I am an anchor, and he is a sailboat.

0

Jan 12, 2015

Jan 12, 2015 at 11:38 AM UTC

set me free

Set me free, oh, gravity, I cannot stay here, I am an anchor, and he is a sailboat.

5

and at times, i wonder if you've ever really seen her, beautiful her. in those moments when her heart is beating fast because she's being smart, and when her eyes are watery because she's drowning in memories. she's so beautiful, can't you see it? when her cheeks are rosy red and her hair is mussy. shy, humble. have you ever really looked at her? her heart spills out and she is surrounded by an air of love. she's breathtaking, especially when her breath has been taken, haven't you noticed? haven't you noticed how bright her eyes are when she loves you? she wants to be yours and it's a beautiful sight, you should see her. you should see her, you would fall in love the same way she crashed into being in love with you

0

Jan 12, 2015

Jan 12, 2015 at 11:34 AM UTC

you should see her

and at times, i wonder if you've ever really seen her, beautiful her. in those moments when her heart is beating fast because she's being smart, and when her eyes are watery because she's drowning in memories. she's so beautiful, can't you see it? when her cheeks are rosy red and her hair is mussy. shy, humble. have you ever really looked at her? her heart spills out and she is surrounded by an air of love. she's breathtaking, especially when her breath has been taken, haven't you noticed? haven't you noticed how bright her eyes are when she loves you? she wants to be yours and it's a beautiful sight, you should see her. you should see her, you would fall in love the same way she crashed into being in love with you

1

You say you accept us? Why the hell do you use 'that's gay' as an insult if you're so accepting? And when are you going to learn that there's more than just gay and straight. Just like there's more than black and white, and there's more than ignorance, though I rarely see it! And if you think the word 'faggot' is ok, then walk away because we're gonna have a problem. You have it so easy. Do we walk around asking you why you chose to be straight? Should we? DO YOU GET FORCED INTO ******* CONVERSION THERAPY LIKE OH NO, WAIT, YOU'RE STRAIGHT? TSK TSK LITTLE BOY. GAY IS THE NORM, BEING STRAIGHT IS JUST A PHASE! No! You don't. And I may be wrong, but has anyone ever slit their throat because someone was like 'oh, you're straight'? Probably not, right? So get out of my face unless you're going to accept us, because there shouldn't even be a question about this! We just like different people. Stop making us afraid, stop using our sexuality as a weapon, stop questioning us, just stop.

0

Jan 7, 2015

Jan 7, 2015 at 10:43 PM UTC

Dear Straight People,

You say you accept us? Why the hell do you use 'that's gay' as an insult if you're so accepting? And when are you going to learn that there's more than just gay and straight. Just like there's more than black and white, and there's more than ignorance, though I rarely see it! And if you think the word 'faggot' is ok, then walk away because we're gonna have a problem. You have it so easy. Do we walk around asking you why you chose to be straight? Should we? DO YOU GET FORCED INTO ******* CONVERSION THERAPY LIKE OH NO, WAIT, YOU'RE STRAIGHT? TSK TSK LITTLE BOY. GAY IS THE NORM, BEING STRAIGHT IS JUST A PHASE! No! You don't. And I may be wrong, but has anyone ever slit their throat because someone was like 'oh, you're straight'? Probably not, right? So get out of my face unless you're going to accept us, because there shouldn't even be a question about this! We just like different people. Stop making us afraid, stop using our sexuality as a weapon, stop questioning us, just stop.

14

i loved to d r a g on my cigarette, the way you d r a g g e d out your syllables. and i loved to i n h a l e your promises like you i n h a l e d my perfume, so close to me that our ribcages melded. i want you to love me, but i know that this might just be me e xhal ing him. and you might be a f r a i d to i n h a l e her any longer. but i will keep holding on even if my fingers burn on the embers. and even if my lungs collapse from loving you too much.

0

Jan 6, 2015

Jan 6, 2015 at 12:27 PM UTC

inhale

i loved to d r a g on my cigarette, the way you d r a g g e d out your syllables. and i loved to i n h a l e your promises like you i n h a l e d my perfume, so close to me that our ribcages melded. i want you to love me, but i know that this might just be me e xhal ing him. and you might be a f r a i d to i n h a l e her any longer. but i will keep holding on even if my fingers burn on the embers. and even if my lungs collapse from loving you too much.

27

Rain or shine, and whether or not I had argued with my family, the screen flickered to life and my heart skipped a beat. Something was different in the television. There were nights where I would talk to cast members, tears streaming down my face because I hated myself, and I would go to sleep grinning like crazy. It's one thing to be in love with a person, but the butterflies in my belly came from a whole world. A kingdom, called Everealm. Where the only monster was Verlox, not me, and there were ballads, not the quiet cry of a lonely girl. Knights in shining armour, a handful of princess warriors who held on tight. Everealm felt like a dream, thousands of miles and a few worlds away. But it was always there for me, even that night when my mom thought I couldn't keep myself safe, and I had to go to a crisis center. But I came home to army of heroes who took me in as their own, and taught me that I was one of them. A hero, not because I wielded a Sunspear, but because I kept going. I had enough reasons not to go on, it'd be easy to give up. But there was The Quest, and that gave me my own quest- to dance my way through this storm, and then pull others out of theirs. After all, there's a hero in all of us. You just need to find it.

0

Dec 26, 2014

Dec 26, 2014 at 10:52 PM UTC

The Clarity of a Hero

Rain or shine, and whether or not I had argued with my family, the screen flickered to life and my heart skipped a beat. Something was different in the television. There were nights where I would talk to cast members, tears streaming down my face because I hated myself, and I would go to sleep grinning like crazy. It's one thing to be in love with a person, but the butterflies in my belly came from a whole world. A kingdom, called Everealm. Where the only monster was Verlox, not me, and there were ballads, not the quiet cry of a lonely girl. Knights in shining armour, a handful of princess warriors who held on tight. Everealm felt like a dream, thousands of miles and a few worlds away. But it was always there for me, even that night when my mom thought I couldn't keep myself safe, and I had to go to a crisis center. But I came home to army of heroes who took me in as their own, and taught me that I was one of them. A hero, not because I wielded a Sunspear, but because I kept going. I had enough reasons not to go on, it'd be easy to give up. But there was The Quest, and that gave me my own quest- to dance my way through this storm, and then pull others out of theirs. After all, there's a hero in all of us. You just need to find it.

44

to try is to waste the last of my energy. as i lay broken and exposed on a cold floor, i cry until the heat on my skin is enough to shatter the building. to try is to tear out the hearts of pure people. as i burn too bright to handle, i darken the souls of angels. to try is to make the stolen kisses last too long. a kiss on the lips of that gorgeous girl, knowing she's a ***** a kiss on the lips of that perfect boy, knowing he's to be married soon enough. a kiss on the lips of death, knowing that there's no reason to continue. to try is to make the drowning go faster. to try is to die.

0

Dec 21, 2014

Dec 21, 2014 at 5:06 PM UTC

to try

to try is to waste the last of my energy. as i lay broken and exposed on a cold floor, i cry until the heat on my skin is enough to shatter the building. to try is to tear out the hearts of pure people. as i burn too bright to handle, i darken the souls of angels. to try is to make the stolen kisses last too long. a kiss on the lips of that gorgeous girl, knowing she's a ***** a kiss on the lips of that perfect boy, knowing he's to be married soon enough. a kiss on the lips of death, knowing that there's no reason to continue. to try is to make the drowning go faster. to try is to die.

23