So close, yet so far
trying to relive through the moments that will never come back,
Going distant, and distant and distant
like the milestones along the road growing small…
I am gazing through the back seat of a car,
and slowly forgetting where the milestones are…
it’s not fair,
these images in my head,
some existing and some diminishing
transforming into the vivid images of a beautiful dream I will soon forget,
it hurts when memories exist,
it hurts even more when they slowly fade away;
My brain in a pitiable auto format mode,
only so much of Terabytes it can accommodate!
but son! We can go to the front seat and drive!
Look out for the milestones that will grow big instead of small,
We will make note of each one of them
until we pass by and again forget them all,
but don’t worry the road won’t end,
maybe the never ending journey won’t make sense,
maybe the past will haunt again,
maybe the future won’t seem bright
especially with beautiful images of the trail behind splashed all over inside,
maybe chaos will forever be chaos,
maybe the noise will never turn into symphony,
So what, son, so what?
come to the front seat,
don’t be seated at the back,
your reasons to stay are good,
and I have nothing better to argue,
but don’t waste too much time connecting the dots,
it will never make sense when you will want it to,
come at the front, we will have fun,
We will never talk about the dots!
We will never talk about the road!
And trails shall become a map, and dots an image,
One day, one day out of nowhere…
when you would have forgotten that you ever cared.
Oct 12, 2015
Oct 12, 2015 at 5:53 AM UTC
How many days have you forgotten? How many days are there to forget?
How many deeds have got you deceived? How many are there that you regret?
Crushed under opinions, hidden behind good impressions,
Caught up in denial, under vain beautiful expressions,
The clock is ticking; the so-called time is flying by…
And yet you lie stuck searching for the I in your I…
Adapting, conforming, certain things have to be learnt
Lost and confused yourself, some dreams have to be burnt…
Between the choices of rights and wrongs,
You stretched ignorance for too long…
Now, relevance doesn’t make sense,
The prospect of living is too intense,
There is a thin line between the choice -whether to live or to die…
Just how far will you go to find the I in your I?
Why should you chase the sound if echoes are perfectly fine?
Why should you chase chaos if life is perfectly aligned?
Tired of possessing things that you don’t even deserve,
Tired of invading space that you should have reserved,
A persona is all you have, Identity is long gone lost
A thing you thought you bought; now you have to pay the cost.
And the clock is ticking and ticking; the so-called time is flying by…
And yet you lie stuck searching - Where is the I in your I?
Apr 9, 2015
Apr 9, 2015 at 3:38 PM UTC
*You wish I was there,
That I hadn’t gone,
With tears streaming down,
You fell asleep sad and torn.
You dreamt that I held you…
And told you “It’s okay”
But Oh! Dear, love!
You never needed me to stay.*
Feb 7, 2015
Feb 7, 2015 at 3:12 AM UTC
Time has come and the time has gone,
Another sun will rise with another dawn,
All I have now are the traces of the missing star,
An unknowingly discontented heart or an unacknowledged scar,
Oh! If I could just know the reason why or just the meaning of I,
As if listening, “Why bother?” whispers the lovely orange sky.
So, maybe I am laughing I cannot really see,
Or maybe it’s alright, I cannot really feel,
Anyhow I look forward to another misplaced sun,
Another beautiful day and another misleading run,
Maybe the night shall make me tough, and hope will keep me high,
And then, as if listening, “Why bother?” whispers the lovely orange sky.
So now I finally listen, I melt into the beautiful hues,
Lost or Found? I don’t really have many clues,
Few tears escape my eyes as if they have committed treason,
Is it the dying day or the dream? I don’t really know the reason.
Few more fall as the colors fade and as the last traces of light die,
And then, as if listening, "Why bother?” whispers the lovely orange sky.
Jan 7, 2015
Jan 7, 2015 at 11:25 AM UTC
So, the rat went on this trail that was open, wide and broad,
Running and running, he chased all those who were aboard,
He ran and he sped, he left more and more behind,
And among all the cheers spent on him, his own he couldn’t find.
But following other rats was in fact perfectly fine.
His proud parents, his envious friends- How could he ever mind!
So, he ran anyway, his stars were aligned,
So what if his life was something that he never got to define!
The rat kept running on the track, dodging every attack
He learnt what they taught,
They told him and he sought,
They lied and he bought,
He never questioned, he never thought,
For himself he never fought.
And he ran anyway, he didn’t seem to mind…
So what if his life was something that he never got to define?
But then one day he stopped.
Horror, shrieks, jaws were dropped,
Ridiculed and laughed at,
Such ungrateful little brat!
And then wits came back to him consisting mostly of fear,
Vision had been hazy but now the track again was clear,
So, he ran again, he didn’t seem to mind,
It was foolish of him to ever have resigned,
It’s a rat race ******* Running is all you have to do.
You think of Stepping out of it? What are you, a fool?
Dec 11, 2014
Dec 11, 2014 at 4:53 PM UTC
Oh! Bird! Oh! Yellow bird! To where did you fly?
Gliding through the air, swimming across the sky?
Would we meet again? Maybe chat a little?
Share the stories of clouds and how in sky they lay littered?
I’ll tell you the tales of chaos, mess and confusion,
Greed, pleasure, money, loneliness and seclusion…
Of happiness and sorrows,
Useless hopes of better tomorrows,
Of unanswered questions and unexplained meaning
of living, dying and dreaming.
Oh! Bird! Oh! yellow bird! Where have you gone?
Come back! Maybe chat a little? I sit here sad and torn.
Nov 7, 2014
Nov 7, 2014 at 8:58 AM UTC
The road that I’ve walked across,
Has led me to nowhere,
I would’ve asked for directions,
But I have no address with me to spare,
I ask my heart, I ask my mind, I ask myself again,
I hear no one replying, nobody seems to care.
So, now I sleep again,
With the pain and the sorrow,
And I smile as I close my eyes…
Hallucinating a better tomorrow.
Oct 3, 2014
Oct 3, 2014 at 4:08 PM UTC
I asked again but my hope refused to extinguish,
It smiled and told I had always been distinguished.
So, I kept checking my mail box even if it seemed lame,
I kept waiting and waiting but that Hogwarts letter never came.
Eleven progressed to twelve, twelve to thirteen,
Mistaken- I thought-they must have been,
Meanwhile I did my own reading and learnt all the curses,
And with the wand I never had I practiced all the verses.
First of September arrived again, and again, and again.
And with the years that passed, so increased the pain,
“So the age limit isn’t actually eleven!” then I optimistically thought,
“Oh! What a brutal test of patience they cleverly plot!”
Pictures in newspaper don’t move, brooms yet don’t fly,
And yes there are times that these thoughts make me cry,
“Hogwarts doesn’t exist”- Oh! These oblivious muggles continue to tell,
Deep down they are just jealous that they just can’t cast a spell,
“Well, can you?” they ask laughing and teasing,
Their voice brimming up with sarcastic appeasing…
“Not yet” I silently speak, “Just wait for days some...
My pretty little Hogwarts letter is just about to come.”
Sep 9, 2014
Sep 9, 2014 at 6:40 PM UTC
Oh! Heart! Silently swallow your pain, don’t let it show again!
Eyes have swelled and weakened, don’t let them rain again!
I am sure hope stays nearby! He will buy you a smile,
Till then have a fake one! I am sure it will last some miles.
I know you won’t believe but what could have been done?
How in hell, in the midnight, could you bring up the sun?
And the night is not that dark, see how the stars shine?
So, sit here, shut your mouth, don’t let me hear you whine!
I am sure Optimism is busy, got her kids to drop to school,
But heart! She is our neighbor; she will come back soon,
And I know Hope is a loner, wanders from streets to streets,
But being the foodie that he is, he will come back to eat!
And love never dies, the eldest vampire we know,
With the constant need of blood you pump where else can he go?
So, what is it you fear, bud? They all are there with you,
It’s a bright sunny day out here, don’t sit back there in blue…
Jun 11, 2014
Jun 11, 2014 at 5:58 AM UTC
When the moon is out there shining,
When the stars are twinkling out in dark,
All the emotions come bursting out of her,
Oh! how they come right from her heart!
What can she do? What can be done?
Just to see you once again,
Just to be there back in time to take all your pain,
It shouldn’t have been you,
Oh! how she didn’t have a clue!
Time heals with every settling sun they say,
But it just digs it deeper and deeper , augmenting the dismay.
She doesn’t want to be loved, she doesn’t want to be adored.
Just come back once and Shout at her once more,
Don’t show her you care,
Just greet her with glare,
But come back once like you had always been there.
With every tear that wet the cheeks under the moon,
With every regret darkening the sun amidst the noon,
Sitting beneath the twinkling stars, battling with the memories,
Thinking of how the future could have been,
Thinking of how the present turned out to be,
She looks up in the sky, with blurred vision,
With hope that someday she would find you in the light,
And lovingly whisper -Good night dad, good night.
Apr 19, 2014
Apr 19, 2014 at 9:33 AM UTC