This is crazy
How could this be?
That I have found someone
That truly understands me?
This new drug
The happiness you have brought
And what of our future?
My heart flutters at the thought
You ignite this fire
Inside me, I can't explain
You have a hold on me
**** you drive me insane
Your words, they take me
To a whole new time
Back when things were easy
This feeling, divine
Life may be confusing
But one thing is true
My smile will remain
As long as I have you
So let’s take on this world
Your hand in mine
Together, we’ll make it
One step at a time
Apr 16, 2021
Apr 16, 2021 at 9:39 PM UTC
I’m toppling over the lies that you pave
Saying you’ll change but its all the same
You tell me its love, no it hate
In the worse way
I have to decide
Whether I need to escape
Or maybe I should hide
But I cant say Im blind
To the reasons why
I know that youre struggling deep inside
But I’m out of time
Im out of cries
Youre like a drop of dye
Into water
Once I let you in
I cant get you out again
I can never win
But I keep raising my chin
Because I know I cant dwell
On whatever this is
As far as i can tell
You only bring me hell
My body is a product
Being sold on a shelf
Struggling with the things I’ve been told
Untangling the lies they wove
Reaching for the ceiling
I cant tell what I’m feeling
Confused and bleeding
I’m searching for what you call
Positivity
I’m ready to fall
I’m breaking through walls
To finally find
That I am enough
Apr 16, 2021
Apr 16, 2021 at 1:10 PM UTC
I’m having trouble thinking
My heart won't quiet down
This pounding in my chest -
Such disorienting sounds
Was a simpleminded heartache
Far too much to ask?
I’m searching for an answer
But still I can't look back
Emotions war within me
Each fighting to the top
Concerns for his health
Blurring my own thoughts
Then there’s my self esteem
This pattern I’ve not broken
It seems that I’m not much
Just a body and a trojan
I know that I can’t dwell
On anything they think
My opinion is what matters
But it’s getting harder not to sink
Creating needed boundaries
Is the next important step
It’s harder than I thought
But I'm doing my best
Apr 16, 2021
Apr 16, 2021 at 12:54 PM UTC
We mourn
We cry
Try and mend
These lies
Our love, uncertain
Unstable
We waver
Were trapped
In this cycle
Disconsolate
We lose our grip
Our stories
Once told
Now crumble
As we unfold
Our secrets
And regrets
They haunt us
We can't forget
This pain
This torment
It breaks us
Till we’re nothing
But fragments
Left to burn
There is no cure
We just have to let
The pieces fall
And watch our mistakes
Bury us all
Apr 14, 2021
Apr 14, 2021 at 7:55 AM UTC
The wind kisses my sun-red cheeks
Tiny sand pebbles tickle my feet
Droplets of sweat develop in sheets
Close my eyes and soak up the heat
The laughter of children fills my ears
The roar of waves washing away my fears
I take a breath, a smile tugs on my lips
Not future, no past, there is only this
Apr 13, 2021
Apr 13, 2021 at 11:26 PM UTC
The feathery touch of brush to paper
Lets me forget your nagging whispers
The colors slide down and drip
Letting go of what I miss
The inky black and blood-red paint
Remind me why I ignore your shapes
You are the puzzle I’m refusing to solve
So like paint into water, I let you dissolve
Apr 13, 2021
Apr 13, 2021 at 11:25 PM UTC
It seems that I’m lost in a field of clouds
Am I reaching for the stars or crashing down?
These thoughts and this shame
Ricochet through my brain
How do I leave the one thing
That brings a smile to my face?
You told me this was forever
An endless journey we’d endeavor
But I notice the cracks in your words
The spark in your eyes I’d been blind to before
I was distracted by your beautiful demeanor
Lost in your smiles and heartwarming laughter
You look through my eyes and say you love me so
But now I see through your lies, so I must let you go
Apr 13, 2021
Apr 13, 2021 at 11:24 PM UTC
I know I’ve grown
But its not perfect
Im certain
I’m used to hiding behind curtains
Is this all worth it?
Can I maintain a positive mind?
Can I shy away from what's beneath?
What I hide behind my reddened cheeks
The ice is cold beneath my feet
What if I fall, the sun out of my reach?
The weather is warming
I'm about to go back
I’ll be happy to go,
But what if it's a trap?
I’m scared I’ll relapse
Can I shield myself,
Or will the knife pierce my back?
I keep writing and writing
Hoping I’ll express how I’m feeling
But my words fall short
This fear is stealing
my heart from whats healing
What happens if I slip?
Will I get up after I trip?
Can I take what I’ve learned
To grow from mistakes
Can I hold myself together
Will I be able to stay safe?
Apr 13, 2021
Apr 13, 2021 at 11:11 PM UTC
Ink runs down my chin
Once its left my lips
It drips and drips
To my fingertips
So I write on a slab
The story of my past
Letters in black
What I’ve been holding back
Once I’m finished
And I’ve used up all language
I take a step back
To see what I did
But it's illiterate
Blobs of nonsense
Is this all that I am
Something no one will understand?
In anger and frustration
I try smearing what makes me a person
But the ink is dry
I cant hide
From who I am
All that I can do
Is add more and more
Till my hands are shaking
And there is new ink in the making
So that instead of black blobs of nothing
I can create colors of wonder and lightning
So that on this slab
I mirrored myself and my past
So that I can come back
To the moment I found who I am
Apr 4, 2021
Apr 4, 2021 at 12:53 AM UTC
You'll pick me up at seven to our perfect garden house
Butterflies and ladybugs will scurry in and out
We dance about the mossy cracks to plant our seedless love
We roll around our ***** floor covered in pixie dust
We know the neighbors will complain of nightly locust sounds
But we just keep on grinning in our perfect garden house
We hang our flowered frames on textured tree trunk walls
Staring at our portraits we are not invisible
We snuggle under lily pads and kiss beneath the sun
A smile on your lips because we don’t have to run
We fall away together because we cannot do without
We live and sing and shine inside our perfect garden house
Apr 4, 2021
Apr 4, 2021 at 12:52 AM UTC