It started when I was twelve
A new place, a new school
When I couldn't quite understand myself
Not the best place to lose my school
It started when I was in class
When the teacher called me innocently
My heart started beating too loud, too fast
And then I felt all heads and eyes on me
It started when I was fourteen
The year when I was invited to a dance
But all I could hear were the haunting taunts, so mean
That's why I stayed home in a trance
It started when he asked me out
By this guy I liked, out of the blue
When I tried to answer, I couldn't open my mouth
Red-faced, I ran like an animal escaping the zoo
It started when I was sixteen
And I was graduating top of the class
But giving a speech, I wasn't too keen
Felt a bottomless pit on my stomach so vast
It started when I was an adult
Found myself not getting any employment
I just know that all of this is my fault
Cause it feels like some kind of punishment
I know how it all started
But I only have so much left to bend
I feel like I am being deserted
I just wanna know when this will end
Jun 7, 2019
Jun 7, 2019 at 8:31 AM UTC
One day
I was walking
By this lonely road
Heading for nowhere
Then I thought of you
One day
I was dreaming
This unintelligible haze
Of maddening nothings
Then I thought of you
One day
I was writing
The days of my life
Where not a thing stood out
Then I thought of you
One day
I was reading
This bumbling love story
That I never related to
Then I thought of you
One day
I would say
This out loud to you
Then probably it can be a reality
And not just a thought of you
Apr 8, 2019
Apr 8, 2019 at 5:28 AM UTC
It was a beautiful day
The sun was out
The sea breeze
And the crashing waves
I was raring for a dip
And I was curious
I was drawn
Like newly hatched turtles
To the sea
I can’t recall
The exact moment
I felt the tingling sensation
Of the saltwater
On my sole
It was fun, at first
The contrast of
The cold water
And my warm legs
Yin and yang
Dazed, I went forward
On and on and on
I was clamoring for the cold
Even if the sea
Didn’t seem to mind
The water was up ’til my chest
But I didn’t notice it then
The waves were higher
Hitting me more regularly
Like clockwork
The water was up ’til my nose
I couldn’t breathe
Well, I did but it was
All water
I try to go back
But the currents pull me in
And then I realized
I was in too deep
Mar 30, 2019
Mar 30, 2019 at 11:28 AM UTC
I am a force
To be reckoned with
But I can't help
But be pulled
By your gravity
Are you the Earth
And I, the moon?
Orbiting for eternity
Close but not quite touching
Near yet so far
Am I an asteroid?
Speeding across the galaxy
Burning brightly in your sky
And then crashing into you
My remains only a blemish
On your beautiful face
Are we twin stars?
Revolving around a common point
A dance perfected across millenia
Our audience, the planets
Our witness, the constellations
Or are you a black hole?
Devouring everything in sight
Slowly seeping away at my light
I grow weaker and weaker
Still entirely devoted
Until I am no more
Mar 29, 2019
Mar 29, 2019 at 4:32 AM UTC