looking back, you never wanted me.
you said you wanted a good democrat to take home to mama.
you wanted a trophy.
i sped all the way to campus.
i'm sure i went over the speed limit.
you couldn't wait one more hour.
i wouldn't say yes.
we had a date, but i couldn't say yes.
you need the answer, don't you?
i have never let another see me naked.
others have taken my clothes, but you took my shield.
i trusted you with my vulnerability.
in the afterglow, i wrapped my arms around you, a hand on your chest.
you made big promises and big plans that we both know you couldn't keep.
i trusted you and told you i'd see you after work.
you said you were so tired.
i offered up a bed, but you said you needed to think.
you always need to think.
i woke up three hours early so i could stop by your room before class.
i wanted to cuddle, you told me to stop it.
i thought you were joking.
the text still lives in my phone.
i didn't want to make it official.
so you didn't want to make it work.
you never wanted me.
you just wanted a status update.
you didn't care who you dated.
you were gonna use me.
i was gonna be the girl you could show mama.
i was gonna be your prize.
it's better that it happened this way.
you are not who i thought you were.
i am not who you wanted me to be.
-hm.
Oct 12, 2016
Oct 12, 2016 at 4:48 PM UTC
things aren't okay.
i hope my suicide jokes catch your eye.
but they don't.
you don't care about me.
you don't love me.
and you don't need me.
Mar 14, 2016
Mar 14, 2016 at 1:27 AM UTC
i love the you no one gets to see.
don't get me wrong, you're beautiful all the time.
but i love seeing your shield shatter.
Feb 16, 2016
Feb 16, 2016 at 6:22 PM UTC
I shouldnt have lied and said I was okay.
I should have asked you for help.
Oh god, I need your help.
I am shattered.
Do you not see my broken bones?
Do you not see the way I cry out for help?
I just want to be noticed.
I shouldn't have lied.
But you should've known.
Dec 14, 2015
Dec 14, 2015 at 8:25 PM UTC
maybe not today,
but in our hearts,
we are one.
Nov 18, 2015
Nov 18, 2015 at 1:30 PM UTC
I am not so much mad.
it was my fault.
what was I to expect?
I'm not good enough.
I am not so much upset.
you still love her
oh god
love me instead.
I will not waste tears,
only ink.
Nov 18, 2015
Nov 18, 2015 at 5:16 AM UTC
i will walk
away
and watch you crash
and burn.
you are nothing with out me.
Jul 18, 2015
Jul 18, 2015 at 12:51 PM UTC
maybe I am not
meant to fall in love with you
maybe nobody
May 4, 2015
May 4, 2015 at 10:21 AM UTC
stand me up under the truck
mixer on full speed
turn it higher, higher
pour liquid on me
if I can't learn to stop
destroying myself
destroying others
make me.
turn me into stone
May 4, 2015
May 4, 2015 at 7:01 AM UTC