my love
is warm and welcoming
unconditional and forgiving
undeniably passionate
yet you drained that love from me
pouring it out and wasting it away
because you believed it would never cease
taken for granted time and time again
I became accustomed to feeding your heart
without first caring for mine
until the love had withered
and there wasn’t enough for both of us
I thirsted for the love
that you wouldn’t give me
because I gave all I had to you
Apr 2, 2018
Apr 2, 2018 at 10:54 PM UTC
I had been drowning for so long
fighting to stay afloat
feet kicking while I’m slowly sinking
desperately gasping to breathe
I figured that it was hopeless,
in what appeared to be an endless sea
helplessly flailing about in the water
there’s no one here that can rescue me
“how can you drown
if you know how to swim?”
but even a fish can drown in the water
time has passed and I’m feeling defeated
I can no longer fight
I let my body surrender
I close my eyes as I’m falling backwards
waiting to be swept away by the tide
but instead,
just as I thought I’d vanish completely
I became weightless
I was no longer sinking
I open my eyes
a rush of relief
I begin to float
and I am able to breathe.
Jan 19, 2018
Jan 19, 2018 at 7:54 PM UTC
I sat alongside the water.
I let the subtle sound of the gentle waves crashing against the shoreline drown out my own thoughts and troubles.
I sat in solitude from midday to sundown.
I waited for the sky to part with the day’s sunlight.
I waited for the sky to glow with bright swirls of orange and magenta, before the sky greets its stars.
Instead, the sun quietly sank away, its rays hidden by the clouds as the night rolled in.
I am the sun of my own universe.
Some days my presence is vivid and my energy is something you can’t help but notice.
And some days the clouds hide my radiance.
But that doesn’t mean I won’t shine again tomorrow.
Jan 6, 2018
Jan 6, 2018 at 10:29 PM UTC
I fight to shake the crippling feeling of knots in my stomach,
most days I can do it with ease.
I’m alive and bright and everyone takes notice.
but today was one of those days,
I had succumbed to all of the day’s chaos and disarray,
sinking like an abandoned ship.
I am overwhelmed and agitated,
My face is hot and my heart pounds in a rage against my chest.
all I want is to get through the day.
the moment I finally have a chance to breathe,
I can’t help but to fall apart.
all of my anger had turned into tears,
today I felt defeated.
but it was just a bad day and I usually don’t let it consume me,
but sometimes it happens and the day can be so unforgiving.
Jan 3, 2018
Jan 3, 2018 at 1:29 AM UTC
what if I told you
that you didn’t have to fool me
and you don’t have to convince the world
that you have it all together
and that your world is so bright behind those rose-colored shades.
I can see past the filters and through your deceit,
your world isn’t as lovely as it seems.
but still for the audience you display a false sense of happiness
a staged idea of having it all together
so busy convincing others —
perhaps you’ll never know when you’ll be content.
it’s exhausting, isn’t it?
trying to maintain appearances?
the picture you painted for me is not the one you paint for your audience.
just
be
you
Dec 22, 2017
Dec 22, 2017 at 3:04 PM UTC
I want you
to take the time
to discover
my mind
to learn
my fears
to encourage
my passions
to admire
my successes
to love
my soul in its entirety.
otherwise
I’ll keep the time
to do it
myself.
Dec 17, 2017
Dec 17, 2017 at 2:52 AM UTC
dear woman,
you are simply too hard on yourself
you have yet to realize the beauty in your eyes
you underestimate your wisdom,
yet your soul is always kind.
you are the embodiment of strength
a shining light in the dark
do not be cruel to yourself,
take time to love your body and heart.
your touch is soft and gentle
your voice is reassuring
you’re perfectly imperfect,
there’s no room for worrying.
your flaws are unique and defining traits,
still many are enamored with the imperfections you hate.
so look in the mirror and smile once more,
for you are a woman you should love and adore.
Dec 11, 2017
Dec 11, 2017 at 3:06 PM UTC
when the world moves past you
in a gust of uncertainty and fear
I would prefer to stay in solitude
rather than bring anyone near
ironic it seems, against my own advice
since I’d always tell others to not keep it inside
but I refuse to share the burdens of my mind
I’ll just remain in my solitude,
because here I have nothing to hide.
Dec 11, 2017
Dec 11, 2017 at 2:42 PM UTC
In a perfect world
Time would be tangible
I could relive the sweet moments a million times,
Feeling the same fire of emotion as I felt before
I could use the hindsight of what I’ve learned to see and do things differently
To return to a place in the past with the wisdom I have now
To alter the course of timelines and erase the wrongs
All to conjure a future just as I dreamt it,
With all the beautiful fantasies I had of us
And every blissful moment in between
A race from past to future,
trying to create what the present could be,
If only in my own imagination.
If only time could work differently.
Dec 9, 2017
Dec 9, 2017 at 7:37 PM UTC
So effortless it came, hurling its way through each barrier I had fought so hard to keep up.
It held me tight in a familiar but long forgotten wave of emotion.
The sweet embrace of his touch, the most secure feeling of being wrapped in his arms, the way his lips felt when they were pressed against mine...
Amidst all of my emotions for a new love, it all came rushing back to you, just for a moment that seemed to last forever. Perhaps it was because I hadn’t felt these things since I was so in love with you..
The way he would gaze into my eyes and light up at my smile,
his gentle touch and soft spoken demeanor,
his infectious smile that would make me nervous every time..
It had been years since I had felt these very same things with you, the same traits and characteristics I would always admire and continue to fall for in a person.
Swiftly as it came, the big beautiful wave of emotion was gone even faster. In hindsight, were my feelings so strong because they reminded me of you? Or because I missed the feeling of being happy and in love and all of the beautiful waves of emotion that came with it?
So it wasn’t love, it was just a wave of emotion and nostalgia that came crashing,
beautiful and devastating just the same.
Dec 4, 2017
Dec 4, 2017 at 1:30 AM UTC