I cause myself severe anxiety
It's so hard
To have it my way
I overthink it
I don't know what it is
But I have this guilt
This fear
That follows me around
It goes where I am
It takes up time
It gets in the way
I can't make everything perfect
Can't erase that twenty-eight times
It's unreasonable
It's unrealistic
It won't happen
Even if I rewrite everything
Forty times
It still
Isn't perfect
I'm unreasonable
I'm not perfect
I know it's true
So why can't I stop
Doing it?
Sep 27, 2019
Sep 27, 2019 at 1:38 PM UTC
I have this thing
This thing that I do
It's no big deal
It's just this thing that I do
I took three steps
That's one less than four
Even though four is not a bad number
It is too close to the ones that are
Three and eight are the best
Followed by twelve and twenty-four
And all the numbers of seven
Well not the numbers with five
Those send shivers down my spine
Even numbers are better than odds
Excepts two
Which combined with three is five
I said odds are worse
But thirteen is pretty great
As long as it doesn't mix
With the ones that I hate
And eight is Ok
But sometimes it makes me think
That eight is too close to nine
And to make nine you must have five
So sometimes I don't think
That eight is so Ok
This is the thing
This thing that I do
I know this behavior is strange
But this is just the thing that I do
Sep 26, 2019
Sep 26, 2019 at 2:35 PM UTC
Sometimes I wonder
If anyone would understand
Why I am the way I am
If I told the truth
If I came clean
Laid out all the lies
The things I hide
Would they be disappointed
Would they scream in my face
Would they laugh at my ways
I don't know what would happen
I'm too scared to think
Too scared to tell those around me
How I live my days
Sep 26, 2019
Sep 26, 2019 at 2:26 PM UTC