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nubivxgant
nubivxgant
he was a soul who hated his façade. / / http://tsundcku.tumblr.com/
they all say: don’t take what you don’t need. feet on the pavement, ice cream in one hand, a balloon in the other – his mind’s too preoccupied with longing for baseless freedom and perhaps he neglects the melting semi-liquid losing its vibrancy. some nights he tries to erase the parallel lines drawn between reality and reveries, piecing lifeless syllables together to paint a picture of her blurred finesse which he barely recalls. he’s inhaling the thin sheet of fog surrounding his sepia recollections of a short span of time- without being certain of the identity of the defined silhouette hiding beneath layers of ataraxia. the harsh fumes trace crimson paths against bare skin as he chokes, questioning if she was poison, or a monstrosity from within. once a daydream, her : venom in his veins.
0
Dec 24, 2014
Dec 24, 2014 at 9:47 AM UTC
ataraxia | smudged ink.
i stayed up last night to the accompaniment of solitude and quietude – the mere traces of your presence fading along with the sound of raindrops. i pondered about the existence of foolish words – we, us, love, and there was nothing more apt to picture our foolish thoughts amongst the reveries of pastel pink skies. nothing besides bittersweet stupidity. the entire notion of how we could’ve been taking polaroids of bright hues – if only. if only we had been blessed with the simplicity of raw parallel lines carved against rotting wooden tables. if only we had been moored to our first impressions – cold and unworthy. but i had to admit, as the thin sheet of paper slit fragile flakes of skin – perhaps i wasn’t sure of how to treasure and clutch onto things. or i’d rather choose to believe that the angles of my fingers weren’t to your liking, and the gaps between these helpless pieces of skin and bone were too small – too weak, to form a taut yet sturdy support for your soul, greedy for flight.
0
Nov 25, 2014
Nov 25, 2014 at 7:48 AM UTC
_
he remembers the echoes, the cries within the darkness of the cluttered flat – the sound of newspaper against walls, and bare palms against stained tiles. and the muffled melodies formed by the cerulean bubbles leaving one’s dry lips – flakes of dry skin falling off her calloused fingers as he held her hand – and the sound of an injection, a transparent liquid ****** into her veins – leaving her to question the price of happiness against the facades of one’s financial state- for thin sheets of paper reeking of sweat and wine never sufficed to anchor her thoughts. they were never sufficiently strong to cause her to gravitate towards sanity, and stability in the darkest nights.
0
Nov 24, 2014
Nov 24, 2014 at 10:25 AM UTC
toxic.
perhaps fragments are easier to maintain? patching up, trying to make up for the gaping hole within my soul, its arduous. i found more holes, more empty spots in the crevices of my sanity, confidence and abilities. i found out what i needed to work on, but i left my words behind the utterances that used to echo in my head to spur me forward. but this led to them shattering into fragments, falling onto my bare feet, piercing bare skin. yet i found that these pieces didn’t always fit, involving the need to severe some portions off. i found what i should work after, and along the way i’m picking up the pieces. and most of the time, i'm just being foolish. i noticed that i largely overestimate myself. but reaching a point where it get overwhelming, i shy back into the comfort of a damp, crumbling cardboard box. i like to explore things, snuggling up against the warmth of cotton knit sweaters.
0
Nov 12, 2014
Nov 12, 2014 at 11:30 AM UTC
downside up
with parallel lines across her forearm she smiled at the constellations, he used to speak with soft tones, every line which slipped through his dry lips incoherent pieces meant to be left separated. burnt paper and crumpled promises, they weren’t parallel lines with the fortune of an interchange. yet they both learnt lessons, severing memories from empty souls; trembling backs barely in contact, her choice of route the converse of his. love is often said to be the antithesis of selfishness- and she could only wonder if it was once humane to break one’s wings. (j.y.t)
0
Oct 31, 2014
Oct 31, 2014 at 1:12 AM UTC
crystalle
temere - they speak lightly, their dulcet voices competing against the melodious harmonies of soothing ballads – parallel speeches, repeated utterances of love. paliona – people say repetition brings mastery, perfection; if these hackneyed statements were germane to helpless endearment, I would’ve taken the plummet; a timid step off the edge of the concrete building towards the gravel beneath. nemesism – yet too much of heaven is a sin, smothered by the scent of lemongrass dappled with the caresses of ebony tresses; your silhouette fades to nullity; and I fall against the prickly surface of gravel with the memories of the raxeira drawn along the parquet floor; your hand lying in mine.
0
Oct 31, 2014
Oct 31, 2014 at 1:10 AM UTC
jyt
delicate and limp they lie between the spaces amongst hard print on factual papers; occasionally unrealistic figments of self deluding fantasy. “they’re luxuries”, you mumbled, a lament towards their rare materialization in your few hours of slumber; the soft impression leading souls up the garden path, misleading for they were not all that pleasant. midway after sunset your heavy breathing is the silence i hear; your silhouette limp against the amber lights. they came once again, desperation had come once again. you squinted into the distant darkness, “oddities veiled by a coat of blur, though a fantasy felt as tangible as the touch of skin; i’d fall endlessly down the pit. most of all, pathetically i had no one to catch me.”
0
Oct 26, 2014
Oct 26, 2014 at 6:27 AM UTC
dreams
I had my daydreams, my exhilarated sentiments as I stood before the flawless soul; Our story would’ve been written after sunset, before fluttering candlelight, amongst the slow dance of shadows- His sudden endearing simpers akin to vibrancy in pink tinted yoghurt kept in the tight embrace of a glass cup; delicate yet strong. We’d be paper cranes – kept afloat by the taut arms of a thin string holding on with the strength of a tightly tied knot; the closest we’d feel to empyrean happiness. A groggy gaze at the still night sky separated by thin glass and abruptly the constellations in the sky are fathomable; leaving the desire for sufficient courage to profess my fondness for his unblemished, endearing self.
0
Oct 26, 2014
Oct 26, 2014 at 6:25 AM UTC
one seven one zero.
He stood fifty times his height, his palms pressed against the glass separating him from the road in their glamour; blurred images of car in their splendor – and there isn’t the familiar scent of coffee – I call this pandemonium. Nothing beats a day in a café redolent of the finest Arabica, he’d inhale deeply and recall : unroasted gives the sweetest scents of blueberries – roasted’s entirely different: fruit, sugar, perfume – They call this addiction. Mnemonic – a wind chime lost in the array of winds. “You used to be my cup of tea – I drink coffee now.” These words slip out of his dry lips, and a lone tear trickles down a milky cheek; They all say if they’ve got love, they don’t need money – And he’d say if he’s got coffee, he doesn’t need love – He calls this heaven.
0
Oct 26, 2014
Oct 26, 2014 at 6:23 AM UTC
coffee
I used to think that if I made a trip back in time I’d be fast enough to stop you – I used to think that a selfish rewind would bring you back safe & sound. You were a silent child, one who would lie limp – an apple in your right hand; amidst the wasteful afternoons they’d spend flailing below the soft clouds; you were the boy whom nobody would notice in the dusty crevices of the neon shades of red and green. Submerging into the soft memory cushions of our childhood I used to smile, waves of sepia nostalgia sending chills, along with a tinge of sweetness. Remembering your traces was bittersweet, now more bitter than sweet; a lopped ratio. Maybe if I had been quicker on my flat feet, maybe if I had been more sober on a silent evening, maybe if I had been there you wouldn’t have left, would you? I used to wonder, watching you lie limp; where had your teeming enthusiasm gone, where had your everlasting positivity faded to, was it in a dark corner? or had it left along in your backpack; or had it disappeared; You were a victim to the vicious lies spat by the most innocent creature called hope; you were left to desperation amidst the busy street – you were left to nothing. Perhaps pushing your palms together and wishing for the best was not sufficient in the maroon eyes of death in which you’d see your reflection, tired and worn. Maybe if I lodged my right knee against the cold marble floor, and begged hard enough with the sole image of your sweetest – “We had nothing to our name but the old mutual understanding that we were together, a mishap; a disaster.” And by now perhaps I was ill, gravely ill from the dearth of the fruits, the green apples which well pleased by pitless avarice, because [perhaps even an alteration in our memories wouldn’t change our ending]
0
Oct 19, 2014
Oct 19, 2014 at 11:33 AM UTC
foolish heaven.
I used to think that if I made a trip back in time I’d be fast enough to stop you – I used to think that a selfish rewind would bring you back safe & sound. You were a silent child, one who would lie limp – an apple in your right hand; amidst the wasteful afternoons they’d spend flailing below the soft clouds; you were the boy whom nobody would notice in the dusty crevices of the neon shades of red and green. Submerging into the soft memory cushions of our childhood I used to smile, waves of sepia nostalgia sending chills, along with a tinge of sweetness. Remembering your traces was bittersweet, now more bitter than sweet; a lopped ratio. Maybe if I had been quicker on my flat feet, maybe if I had been more sober on a silent evening, maybe if I had been there you wouldn’t have left, would you? I used to wonder, watching you lie limp; where had your teeming enthusiasm gone, where had your everlasting positivity faded to, was it in a dark corner? or had it left along in your backpack; or had it disappeared; You were a victim to the vicious lies spat by the most innocent creature called hope; you were left to desperation amidst the busy street – you were left to nothing. Perhaps pushing your palms together and wishing for the best was not sufficient in the maroon eyes of death in which you’d see your reflection, tired and worn. Maybe if I lodged my right knee against the cold marble floor, and begged hard enough with the sole image of your sweetest – “We had nothing to our name but the old mutual understanding that we were together, a mishap; a disaster.” And by now perhaps I was ill, gravely ill from the dearth of the fruits, the green apples which well pleased by pitless avarice, because [perhaps even an alteration in our memories wouldn’t change our ending]
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