myfavoritecoloristhesky

It's a car like hers I see on the way to work A song I hear at the coffee shop I dream a had last night about a place I'll never see again It's the memories that only exist in my head Of the secret field of wildflowers The endless landscape where you could run forever The sound of her saying "you'll get it when you're older" How much older do I have to get?

0

May 5

May 5, 2026 at 5:19 PM UTC

i miss u

It's a car like hers I see on the way to work A song I hear at the coffee shop I dream a had last night about a place I'll never see again It's the memories that only exist in my head Of the secret field of wildflowers The endless landscape where you could run forever The sound of her saying "you'll get it when you're older" How much older do I have to get?

8

I want to feel known. I want to bring someone home and tell them about how my brother and I used to live in elaborate mansions in the trees. I want to drive them around my home town and tell them of all the places I got heartbroken and all the places I ran to hide and all the places I smiled at the sun believing I could never go blind. I want to tell them of all the friends I've had and how I miss some and am scared of others, to tell them of how theyve grown while helping me grow too. I want to show them the home I grew up in and how I thought it was the best place in the world, surviving tornados, fires, and sadness but we lost it to the lawless. I want to show them my birthmarks and all the constellations and myths my grandmother wrote about the stars on my skin. I want someone to know every curve of the letters in my name. To be able to hear me in my quiet, see me in my dark, hold me in my cold, and love me in my despair.

0

Jan 11, 2022

Jan 11, 2022 at 3:09 PM UTC

do you know my name?

I want to feel known. I want to bring someone home and tell them about how my brother and I used to live in elaborate mansions in the trees. I want to drive them around my home town and tell them of all the places I got heartbroken and all the places I ran to hide and all the places I smiled at the sun believing I could never go blind. I want to tell them of all the friends I've had and how I miss some and am scared of others, to tell them of how theyve grown while helping me grow too. I want to show them the home I grew up in and how I thought it was the best place in the world, surviving tornados, fires, and sadness but we lost it to the lawless. I want to show them my birthmarks and all the constellations and myths my grandmother wrote about the stars on my skin. I want someone to know every curve of the letters in my name. To be able to hear me in my quiet, see me in my dark, hold me in my cold, and love me in my despair.

6

It's ok to not be sunshine It's ok to cry at night Because other people cry too And for them, the sun is too bright

0

Oct 26, 2020

Oct 26, 2020 at 9:54 AM UTC

will you be my friend?

It's ok to not be sunshine It's ok to cry at night Because other people cry too And for them, the sun is too bright

4

He laughs with the darkness Takes joy is others' screams His mistress is the night He is not what he seems Don't believe his ominous smile Don't give in to his twisted love Don't follow him into the depths Don't mistake him for a dove His mind is painted black His eyes are tinted red His tongue is like a serpent's Injecting poison into your head He devoured me He blinded me Showed me what love is not His venomous blood infected me Leaving me to rot

0

Oct 1, 2020

Oct 1, 2020 at 11:03 PM UTC

manipulation is charismatic

He laughs with the darkness Takes joy is others' screams His mistress is the night He is not what he seems Don't believe his ominous smile Don't give in to his twisted love Don't follow him into the depths Don't mistake him for a dove His mind is painted black His eyes are tinted red His tongue is like a serpent's Injecting poison into your head He devoured me He blinded me Showed me what love is not His venomous blood infected me Leaving me to rot

17

When the sun takes his first breath each morning And he is greeted with your gentle smile It gives him joy to illuminate the day When you rise above the horizon each morning And are greeted by the sun's radiance He gives you strength to live another day When the moon conquors the world each night And gives you comfort to sleep in peace He prays for your reign when the morning comes

0

Sep 8, 2020

Sep 8, 2020 at 7:40 PM UTC

each morning

When the sun takes his first breath each morning And he is greeted with your gentle smile It gives him joy to illuminate the day When you rise above the horizon each morning And are greeted by the sun's radiance He gives you strength to live another day When the moon conquors the world each night And gives you comfort to sleep in peace He prays for your reign when the morning comes

9

How do I know if I'm me? How do I know if I'm lying to myself? How do I know if I'm not someone else? What parts of me are real? Learned? Mimicked? Faked? Lies? Who is this soul inside me? How come I barely know her? What does she feel? What is she pressured to think? Is she brave? Confident? Friendly? Generous? Afraid? What does she believe? What are her dreams? Does she love the life she lives? Or is she just getting by? How do I know if she's me? Or just a passerby?

0

Sep 4, 2020

Sep 4, 2020 at 7:05 PM UTC

how do I know myself?

How do I know if I'm me? How do I know if I'm lying to myself? How do I know if I'm not someone else? What parts of me are real? Learned? Mimicked? Faked? Lies? Who is this soul inside me? How come I barely know her? What does she feel? What is she pressured to think? Is she brave? Confident? Friendly? Generous? Afraid? What does she believe? What are her dreams? Does she love the life she lives? Or is she just getting by? How do I know if she's me? Or just a passerby?

23

I held my father's hand for the first time that day My grandfathers blood fell cold "Don't you ever get old" Emergency calls, laughing through the fear Try to remember to breathe breathe breathe Dinner was silent than evening Beause the reality of death grew closer in our minds And our heart beats matched the thunder

0

Jun 1, 2020

Jun 1, 2020 at 11:56 AM UTC

don't go

I held my father's hand for the first time that day My grandfathers blood fell cold "Don't you ever get old" Emergency calls, laughing through the fear Try to remember to breathe breathe breathe Dinner was silent than evening Beause the reality of death grew closer in our minds And our heart beats matched the thunder

11

Do you not remember how you treated me then? What do you mean you "miss me"? When I was there you didn't see me but now that I'm gone you finally notice me. Don't you remember what it was like? I was the place holder, the one no one talked to, the one you ignored for 3 years. Did you forget? Do you think I'm someone else? Do you suddenly miss me now cause I'm finally making something of myself? Don't you remember all the times I was ignored, all the times I had panic attacks in the bathroom, all the times I was afraid to go to church cause I didn't want to feel worthless again? Its ok, I wouldn't expect you to. You were young, friendly, outgoing, just what everyone wanted in a friend. I don't expect you to remember me.

0

May 6, 2020

May 6, 2020 at 11:21 AM UTC

4/29/20 more ramblings about the past

Do you not remember how you treated me then? What do you mean you "miss me"? When I was there you didn't see me but now that I'm gone you finally notice me. Don't you remember what it was like? I was the place holder, the one no one talked to, the one you ignored for 3 years. Did you forget? Do you think I'm someone else? Do you suddenly miss me now cause I'm finally making something of myself? Don't you remember all the times I was ignored, all the times I had panic attacks in the bathroom, all the times I was afraid to go to church cause I didn't want to feel worthless again? Its ok, I wouldn't expect you to. You were young, friendly, outgoing, just what everyone wanted in a friend. I don't expect you to remember me.

14

My dreams are where the shadows creep Exhaustion lurks but I'm afraid to sleep

0

May 6, 2020

May 6, 2020 at 11:08 AM UTC

6/28/19 a stanza