The day is almost ending,
Went out to buy something.
It's almost 11 pm,
Went out to buy iced tea.
The wind is cold,
Streetlights are flickering;
"It's dangerous"
I said under my breath.
But this is the setting I need,
Looking for someone,
With soulless eyes,
And a heart in pain and rage,
With no reason to end things for me,
But will still end things for me.
I hope tonight will be the night
Tonight will be my last night.
Jan 16
Jan 16, 2026 at 11:41 AM UTC
Sometimes, when night is quite; air was cold
I lay in my bed, lonely st in my head
Thinking things I can't comprehend
Anxiety, Scars, is it Insomia?
Remembering that line, echoing
"It's gonna be okay, I'm right here"
Am I really gonna be okay? I doubt
But I believe to th Voices, no question
"YOU CAN STAY", that's what you'll say
As as long as you want, even when you
Grow Up
Keeping me warm with the big hugs
Cover me, especially in my Silent Cry
In the end I know I will be okay
with The View you showed me the first time
we met
Dainty feelings start to grow, I know it's an assurance
That in my Broken Compass, there is a You
to bring me on track
"Stay" we always say
With your outmost care, you really make me stay
Sep 3, 2025
Sep 3, 2025 at 12:03 PM UTC
And the clock strikes at twelve,
Cinderella immediately run,
leaving her left, blood-stained glass slippers,
leaving the prince blooded, open skull on the floor.
She is running towards the freedom,
but the night is still young,
and she still has her right glass slippers clean.
Maybe step mother and sister can help
Aug 9, 2025
Aug 9, 2025 at 10:09 AM UTC
Have you heard the saying,
Your wish come true if you put ir in writing.
So work hard and keep manifesting,
And the universe will answer the calling.
So here I am praying.
Making my wishes is seeing,
For the year following,
A surgery to me is happening.
A new kidney my body will be accepting.
I am already claiming,
This is the future I will be getting
Aug 8, 2025
Aug 8, 2025 at 12:58 PM UTC
There was a wake
In our general outpost
Just a two minutes walk away from home
I think it's the ninth funeral this year?
Last month,
A 22 years old; non-binary; lesbian died on suicide.
Before that,
There's an old man found dead because of heart attack.
Then our neighbor, I don't know why.
And when I passed them
I wished they are happy
Because the mourners did
Three of them shouted "Bingo"
But, I'll be honest
I hope it's my turn next.
Aug 8, 2025
Aug 8, 2025 at 12:25 PM UTC
I've had my first love when I was 8,
Nothing special to him
He's just a boy I just always played with
I don't remember his face anymore
I've had my first love when I was 12
He's the smartest boy in class
But we graduated
Parted our ways
I've had my first love when I was 14
High school, a year older
She had a girlfriend back then
She's my friend
I've had my first love when I was 16
A classmate
I told him in front of class I like him
He smiled, said nothing back
I've had my first love when I was 17
3 years older than me
Admired him for 4 years
And sometimes, I still remember him
I've had my first love when I was 21
He found me at the time when I was not really looking
He is my first in everything.
And it always feel like first time
It's first love
No matter how I looked at it
The feeling are the same
For a new experience
Dec 18, 2023
Dec 18, 2023 at 2:21 PM UTC
Sometimes you asks
"What's the universe plan?"
You wonder,
People around you move forward,
Then, you are here —
Still here
Stuck from the beginning
Time passes,
But still in the beginning.
You did your best
But then you ask
"Did you really do your best?"
People say "Calm—
You are where you are right now
Everything are according to life's plan"
I hope I can choose my place.
I hope I can choose the battle I can fight.
I hope that life didn't choose me for this.
I am doing my best to follow the life's plan.
Or maybe I am not
Oct 17, 2023
Oct 17, 2023 at 9:44 AM UTC
Tonight, i want to write
Not a poem
Nor a story
A diary entry?
A life update maybe
Should i jot it on a piece of paper?
Or my notes app is better?
I don't know where to start
It's been a while
But life is better lately
It is sickening mostly
But, we're getting there
One step at a time
We're going better
How about you?
How are you?
Mar 5, 2023
Mar 5, 2023 at 11:47 AM UTC
Words are just words,
Letters combined together
To give meaning into something
Words are just words,
It shouldn't weigh you
But, words can linger and haunt you
Just like the day i learned the word "dialysis"
February 6, 2022; 10:49PM
It doesn't bother, a fun word in tongue
Until I googled it —
Felt its weight,
It's overwhelming.
Since then, I am crying.
If words are just words,
Why this word aches me so much?
If the word doesn't exist,
Will I suffer from this?
Jun 11, 2022
Jun 11, 2022 at 1:28 AM UTC
and when I die,
i'll keep my messenger open
you can say "hi :) "
or dump your doxc file
no need to say you missed me
but feel free to send the feelings
and sorry if i don't response
but i saw your message
remember,
i'm always here to listen
May 31, 2022
May 31, 2022 at 12:16 PM UTC