I am happy here,
for right now.
In this empty café.
Warm and cozy, yet so lonely.
Jan 11, 2018
Jan 11, 2018 at 2:56 AM UTC
Knives.
Sleek, silver, shimmering.
It speaks to me,
"Come this way."
Mutilation
Is as bad as you make it.
To us it is just a way
To relieve some pain.
Blades.
They are so great,
emotional shade,
a short escape.
Stitches.
Two now,
by myself.
Still no relief.
Jan 11, 2018
Jan 11, 2018 at 2:50 AM UTC
I cut myself again tonight
But I will never tell you
I wish never to fight
I love you dearly,
But I do not want
Your sorrow and pity.
You'll blame yourself,
I know you will.
I promise I won't **** myself.
You have no relation
To this dark habit.
It is but my own creation.
It does not help.
I know, I know.
Right now, it's living hell.
Jan 9, 2018
Jan 9, 2018 at 9:59 AM UTC
X-acto eighteen
Its has been a while
Six months now I've been clean
Now just back in that aisle
Dried brown blood
Still remains
These feelings flood
I can't contain
Your sharp edge
Tears my skin
Now on the edge
I cry and grin
I feel better now
Or so it seems
But I can't allow
These dark extremes
Jan 9, 2018
Jan 9, 2018 at 9:54 AM UTC
The constant war in my mind
Rages like a hurricane
Annihilating humankind
Etching away at my brain
I want to be calm
I want to be cool
But I feel like a bomb
Sure to befool
Death is inevitable
So why should I cry
It gets too unbearable
We're all going to die
Jan 9, 2018
Jan 9, 2018 at 9:51 AM UTC
It's been six months
Since that day
Things went too far.
I almost died
But never cried.
It was the plan,
What I wanted.
I've changed since then.
I'm happy now,
I'm healthy now,
Until right now.
I cut again.
I taste defeat.
I was so strong,
I was complete.
I haven't drank
Since that night
I almost died.
But like I said,
I cut again.
I sense the spiral,
about to begin.
I cannot do it,
Not this time.
I've come too far,
I cleaned my crimes.
I have much to live for.
There are people who
actually depend on me,
actually trust me.
I wont let them down,
No, not again.
Jan 7, 2018
Jan 7, 2018 at 11:59 PM UTC
I want to give myself to you
I swear to God I really do.
But every time we get that close
Most of me is still opposed.
That man f*cked me up,
it will always get me choked up.
I fear he'll always have control,
even though you're on patrol.
Maybe it's myself I fear the most.
Is that his master plan, to be the host?
When he's dead remains a ghost
and that is what I fear the most.
Jan 7, 2018
Jan 7, 2018 at 11:51 PM UTC
this is the new moon
listen to her softly sleep
is this a dream?
Jan 7, 2018
Jan 7, 2018 at 12:40 PM UTC
smell the earth reborn
the moon is once again new
this marks a new life
Jan 7, 2018
Jan 7, 2018 at 12:39 PM UTC
all sounds are muted
the air has a gentle chill breeze
everything is new
Jan 7, 2018
Jan 7, 2018 at 12:38 PM UTC