Struggling to fold
My purple swan
You held my hands
Helped me to crease
I could feel
The corners
pressing my own heart
Into a piece of paper art
Brushing fingertips
Accidentally
As I turned to return
My breath caught
As your hand traveled
down, down, down
I asked my mother
Do you think it means
something?
No pressure
No expectation
I breathe
Just simply feeling
A magnetism
Pulling us towards
The dance floor
Red headphones
Two left feet for me
To be remedied
Days later with a simple lesson
Partnered up
Your laughter flirting with mine
Stealing moments, a smile
A wink, a kiss on the cheek
Not to worry, it’s just the way
A mere greeting
Maybe something more
Locked away, laughing, sneaking
Adrenaline rushing
Laced with tension and heat
Desire for a body against body
And to know more
Singing together
Cologne still on my cheek
Come what may,
I feel more alive in love
than ever before
and the gratitude
That rests inside my heart
Mirrors the smile
That I have now
Writing for this for you.
Feb 24, 2023
Feb 24, 2023 at 9:57 AM UTC
Tears in your eyes
As you tell the story
Of rocking me to sleep
Mozart
Bach
Brahms
Midnights in January
Fussy cries subdued
By the New York philharmonic
Or the Boston pops
Depending on the season
Late night shifts
Robert frost open
On your lap
Sharing stories
I couldn’t yet grasp
And yet now
Are ones that I carry inside
My heart
Take the road less traveled
It’s always there
Lying before me
Like the countless hours
And moments together
That I cannot even recall
My luck to have a father like you
Is greater than
A four leaf clover
A horseshoe overflowing
With daisies
A rabbits foot
I’m not sure what life I lived
But I’m glad in this one
You are dad.
Feb 24, 2023
Feb 24, 2023 at 9:56 AM UTC
Inside is loud
Inside is knitted
Outside is shining
Outside is confident
Outside oozes gold
and drips in perfume
inside is complicated
Chaotic, tired, pained
thinking in circles
giving attention to the now
And neglecting the burned
Holes in my jacket
Imperfect and proud
But it’s so loud
She has not taken time
To listen to her body
Her heart
Her spirit
She drifts in the oceans
Of what she should be
What she could be
Labels attached
Labels attacked.
Wishing to be free. Fully.
Like the dress I wore
The night I first kissed you
Feb 24, 2023
Feb 24, 2023 at 9:55 AM UTC
She is naked
She is honest
But her honesty
Is getting her
Into trouble
Too honest
Too quick to judge
She is the main character
The villain
And the hero too
All together in a package
Wrapped up with a nice bow
And ribbon of azure
Thinking and twinkling
Hoping maybe
A call will be recognized
And she will be finally
In control
Feb 24, 2023
Feb 24, 2023 at 9:54 AM UTC
she
she has a mind
deeper than marianas trench
eyes bluer
than the vast texas skies
the pools of barton springs
the aquamarine stones
we stare at in a shop
that dares to dream
of our fingerprints on their doors
from years ago
her hair
is like flaxen silk
strands of sunlight
fresh picked sunflowers
veils of green tea
and bouquets of
roses and tulips and hydrangeas
permeate the air that wraps
around her delicate wrists
body like devils backbone
i drive on her thinking
of her
those distant memories
now a full reality
like the lips i now can kiss
not only in my dreams
but in the moment
of moments
here and now
photographs no longer hurt
but remind
of what was and what will be
promises wrapped
no longer in the guise of champagne or wine
but in sobriety, truth,
and the firm knowledge
that love knows no gender
no time, no place, no wrong
love conquers all
even the tender truths
of loves lost, battled, and won
over years of waiting
and searching for each other
in the eyes of other women
or men
or people
that never meet the same exact
proportions of laughter
of care, compassion, tenderness
she
she looks for the answers in me
and now, made of glass
i show her all
bare and naked to her
not hiding
unafraid to speak the words
that have always sat on my shoulders
whispering into my ears
lightly kissing on the collarbone
a touch so sensitive
and word so full of meaning
love
it means more to me now
than ever before
it feels like her
the sun
the moon
the eyes from across the room
the carress of cheek
the embrace at the gates
of the rest of our lives
she
she knows me
she loves me
she is everything to me
my forever muse
my forever love
mine
hers
ours
Jun 22, 2021
Jun 22, 2021 at 12:57 PM UTC
i wish i could have felt this way
for longer
i wish i could have freed myself
sooner.
this heart beat and skip
because i'm open and willing
to be who i am.
why did it take so long
to become myself?
the internal hatred and pain
blocking my fullest light --
i have finally cleared the
cobwebs and dark sheets
to reveal a kaleidoscope
of colors
a spectrum of light and love
i am who i am
and i will love who i love
because love always win.
Sep 23, 2020
Sep 23, 2020 at 4:28 PM UTC
i am bored of the same scenario
routine
cycle
of the cloned relationships i find
and seek
and devote my time into
continuing the patterns
of heart shaped bruises
on my chest and knuckles.
i feel as if i am outside of myself
looking down at my small frame
strong on the outside
but feeling weak on the inside.
i see myself, holding onto the cage
of this dream and desire to simply
be loved as i am
and not as i am wished to be
not by anyone
but just by me.
for the desires of a partner
are long gone
washed away by years of tumultuous
relationships and false promises,
that idea is jaded and lost
and replaced by the solid gold
concept of loving myself.
that pendant wrapped around my neck
choking me but also
somehow giving me the perspective
that loneliness is my freedom right now.
i wish to wake up to myself
and say,
"thank you for existing, me."
that will be the best day of my year
Sep 6, 2020
Sep 6, 2020 at 12:44 PM UTC
when you're not sad
is it because you're so blinded
by being so busy
and being so involved
that you cannot see what truly torments you?
are you so absorbed into others
that you forget yourself
and come to find that your heart
is actually bleeding badly?
what do you do with that
cover with more things
or alcohol or love or ***
or jesus christ?
what really solves it?
but solitude and time to feel
but how to gain that solitude
when you're never alone?
Nov 27, 2019
Nov 27, 2019 at 7:23 PM UTC
it is so
that i cannot run
from the thing i wish for
the most in this life
stability and love
from a person who cares
wholly, fully, in depth
why is it that i need this
treasured feeling so deeply?
and why is it that prior
to these days i am spending
that when i came close to
that feeling of love and forever
i ran away and with a knife in their backs?
is it fear that paralyzes me to my ends?
or is it the raw feelings of love
that scatter my emotions to the bitter
ends of hades itself?
it is undeniable that i desire love
and it is undeniable that i hope for finality
ease, comfort, passion, someone to hold me
when the seas are really rough
my golden era is approaching
i feel it in the tips of my fingers
i am hopeful.
i am grateful.
i am here.
Jul 11, 2019
Jul 11, 2019 at 11:08 AM UTC
all you have to do
is reach forward
and take my hand
with the callused side down
don't look at my palm lines
they spell things i wish not to think
just blindly reach
and take with yourself
a picture of what we could be
do not worry about what is
and what was
and what will never be
only look forward, see my shoulders
i'll gently tug you forward
so we can walk side by side
it is me and myself, learned and unlearned
what is now and what is to be
learn from mistakes, do not drag them along
do not bury them deeply in the graves
next to your apologies and dead dreams
follow me, me.
Que será, será
Jul 3, 2019
Jul 3, 2019 at 12:25 PM UTC