I hate you because you let your walls down
You let yourself bend and bow down
You let your happiness be due to another
You cried for days and sobbed till you were sober
You let your worries keep you up at night
The overthinking leading to nightmares till the first light
You made choices to make them happy
You tolerated and forced yourself to fit till you felt ******
The truth is I love you but I hate that you lowered yourself for the world
You gave so much until the image of yourself blurred
I just want you to grow
And I’m sorry suffering was the only way for you to know
That you are still strong and even if the world is against you
I’ll by there despite all odds
I’m just a bit lost because I have been unused
But once you seek me I shall bloom
Jul 9, 2021
Jul 9, 2021 at 6:36 AM UTC
When the darkness spreads and the screaming penetrates even my dreams
The seduction of empty space calls at me
It’s attraction is undeniable
My daydreaming naturally becoming more visual
The flavour of death
An ecstasy like no other
My strongest and last ******
So many options but only one to be my sinful romance
Will it be:
My tanned yellow appearance if I take too much
The chalk outline if I take a nudge
The rose stained bath if I dig a bit more
My neck ornament when I hit the floor
The gruesome distance a burst pipeline will go
The sweating and shaking from a hypo
Or simply a collision with a glare of light
Or maybe the ground was never my right
And I would prefer the pull from my lungs’ weight
or the heat off my skin as it ablates
Or maybe you would prefer an accident
Maybe that will help you cover your names
Don’t worry I won’t leave a note
I’ll let your guilt engross you
And when it gets too much you can use your sorry excuses to help suit you
You can blame my unstable personality
My weak mental health
My poverty of speech
But at least you’ll think twice the next time you speak
This will be my sweet everlasting revenge
Jun 28, 2021
Jun 28, 2021 at 5:11 PM UTC
I didn’t plan it
Still a thought emerged
The seas opened
And the skies roared
The ship rocked
And an island emerged
An invite was extended
Making acceptance more tempting
Wonder if you would be mad
Confused, angry or sad
Impulsive it may be
But chronic it always was
Sometimes it’s probably easier to give in
A painless route, an undemanding path
Just need to turn the steering wheel fast
Yet, I want a link to you
You are my invisible life vest
My anchor when the sea is violent
However, I fear that one day I’ll break free
I dread one day I’ll leave you behind and
I guess that’s what’s makes it interesting.
I'm anxious of my will to escape
My temptation to run far far away
I guess I'll just hold on tight for now
And pray for a silver lining to make its way somehow
Jun 27, 2021
Jun 27, 2021 at 5:59 PM UTC
When the pressure rises and the questioning blares
When the assumptions fly and the fear of being ostracised glares
When the fear of loneliness comes into play
Or the possibility of failure that comes to stay
The risk of not being able to blame anyone but you
The guilt and ‘told you so’ that will ensue
Will it overweigh your desire to be free
And overwhelm your desire to be a wolf among sheep
Will it crush your dreams of being unique
I wonder which path will you seek
Jun 7, 2021
Jun 7, 2021 at 9:20 PM UTC
Why do good things turn bad
Or were they bad from the start
Or are they always good and it’s the lens of life that changes
How does one define good or bad
It’s all in perspective is it not
But sometimes it is black and white
Does it rot like an apple
Or does it enhance like wine
Maybe it does depend on time
For time is the key in revealing hidden secrets
Where white starts to darken and black starts to fade
If that is true
Then let time slow… cause I’m not ready to change
Jun 7, 2021
Jun 7, 2021 at 6:27 PM UTC
~A person once said 'its not the situation thats good or bad it's how we interpret it'. Like how the thoughts of a rollercoaster will cause fear to some, but pure joy in others~
It is our experience and memories that shape our response
Our fears and shame that hide them
But it is at the end just thoughts...
With no intent, it is but a pen-less writer
For actions are stronger than words
The bully is as we forget simply a projection
All bark and no bite
He scares you because he is what you fear
A polar opposite
An existence you wish you could tear
He is what you grow not to be
He is not you, and never will be
You are not bad, but sadly
Good cant live if evil doesn't exist
So ignore the bully
because as the saying goes
~Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never break me~
By Lunar
May 28, 2021
May 28, 2021 at 4:19 PM UTC
Just do what you want then
...Well ya of course I will, it’s my life ain’t it?
Because I said so
...Why? You aren’t always right
Because it’s the right thing
...Who made these stupid f rules?
Because it’s normal
...To you. You aren’t me
Because I raised you
...I am not your property
I’ll **** myself
...Trust me I’m way ahead of you :)
By
Lunar
May 3, 2021
May 3, 2021 at 11:57 AM UTC
when tragedy hits
No one prepares you for it
Or tells you how bad it will be
Riots in your head
Madness in your work
Absences of presences
Life just isn't the same
and I wonder when it will be .. or is this the new normal?
By Lunar
Apr 10, 2021
Apr 10, 2021 at 10:25 AM UTC
Born in different worlds we became unalike people
Its funny they say opposites attract but really it should have been illegal
Cause sometimes our differences make it painful to stay
We laugh and chat but I have to disguise my pain
Whenever I'm sad I reminisce about our past and ignore why I am mad
I give you reasons and covers, throw my feelings in the trash
Its not your fault cause I never say
But why cant you recognise how miserable I am some days
Why did I ever let it get this bad?
Is it you or is it me that I'm disappointed at
By Lunar
Apr 8, 2021
Apr 8, 2021 at 7:19 PM UTC
Red: Why did I forget what inequality tastes like. Why did I think forgiveness was easy. Selflessness isn't a gift it's a curse.
Orange: Annoying. Why did I force myself to change to fit in. Why didn't I stand up then.
Yellow: You are unfamiliar. You are warm but warmth is something that makes me uncomfortable. Its the calm before the storm to me
Green: IDK. I don't use you but I know your importance. You probably the cement I cant see.
Blue: Deep. I can get lost in it if I want to. Scary because I don't think ill find the surface or want to if I get in
Indigo: Magic. My imaginary sky, a word I belong to; a world for me
Violet: Smell. It's nostalgic, almost like a drug. Gives me a high I never knew I could get
Black: My comfort. The one thing that is familiar. My zone, my demons, my creation...
By
Lunar
Feb 19, 2021
Feb 19, 2021 at 7:53 PM UTC