lori-jean
American
Our souls intertwined / He asked “Who are you?” / “I ride on pink wings” / “I am the words I accrue”. / / Hello. / / My name is Lori Jean. I write from the deepest core of my being and consider it a gift from God. / / Most all of my writings are based on real experience and true situations. That's how I cope and/or celebrate, whichever the case may be. / / My words are a journey where no end I describe. Why would I cut off a world where the real me can hide? / / Thank you for walking by my side in our travels and exposing your soul to mine.
Since childhood, the mind chose bright. Ignore the darkness; view the light.
Blame yourself, and make it right. Prove your worth. Here on earth.
Age advances, still not swayed. Heart so caring, it paves the way.
Padded feelings, locked away. So imperfect; it’s hard to stay. Here on earth.
Cry for love, but don’t let in. Once exposed, you’re ******* again.
Judgmental mind, expectations tall; yourself and them, doomed to fall. Here on earth.
Slice the vein. Blood freely flows. Scream in pain. Let no one know. Much easier to let them go.
Isolate. Deny your hate. Create your fate. Here on earth.
I see your heart; pure or not. You cannot hide. I cannot stop.
Your tear is mine; so deeply real. I try to flee. Your pain I feel. Here on earth:
The aging mind; whose thoughts can’t find.
The child wails; as evil impales.
Cancer thrives; please don’t die.
Old age ensues; so sure to lose.
Anarchy spreads, the souls are dead.
Wrong is right. Condone the plight.
All weary from the useless feuds. Just spare from me your platitudes. HERE ON EARTH.
Truism is commonplace. Cliché, banality; the human race.
Do not attempt to state my pace.
(Did you figure out the redundant place?)
Do you care enough to read my face? Are you smart enough to avoid the bait? Or, weakened is it just too late? Here on earth.
Dec 1, 2014
Dec 1, 2014 at 3:21 PM UTC
You sit upon your judgment throne, then glare in awe to be alone.
With loving hands you clench the the stone to crush the skull of the unsuspecting clone. But you don't know.
You remember to aim when your both alone. Crying justification as you gnaw at bones. For a fleeting moment, you realize and revel.
Your saving grace? His book you quote. You crave the taste. It coats your throat. Forgiveness, that's your cruelest joke. But you don't know.
How does it feel to lay sin aside; for convenience sake, to let it slide? Only when it's you to hide. Blessed by God and never-ending bride. But you don't know.
Propane oozes to fuel the heat and warm the frostbite of your feet. You leave your door wide open. Still you cheat. Victim or villain? The two compete. (Born elite?). You don't know.
Far too late to eradicate. Just cover your spoils with heated debate. Cringe while you shoot what you procreate. Not dead. Just wounded. That's their fate. Why don't you know?
Convinced that you bestow no hate; that you're stuck and just can't catch a break. Ungrateful for the thing you take. Entitlement hid by charity fake. As long as it makes both parties feel great. Oblivious it's both souls at stake. You'll someday know.
Nov 1, 2014
Nov 1, 2014 at 4:50 PM UTC
Hope escapes
The hurting soul
The blocking gate
Reveals the toll
Pockets empty
And cannot pass
The view ahead
A looking glass
Words fall short
Actions numb
His creation stained
One more succumbs.
Efforts fail
Plans aborted
Purpose lost
Faults assorted
Angels watch
Intent applauded
The world destroys
More hearts defrauded
Time rushes past
Expectations gone
Temptation laughs
The world moves on
Confusion looms
Anger passes
Now stand alone
Among the masses
Undeserving
On bended knee
Beg for guidance
To honor Thee
Give in to Glory
Hand over doubt
Release control
Straighten out.
Still at the gate
With pockets bare
When time is right
He pays the fare.
(Otherwise, you both wait there.)
Oct 4, 2011
Oct 4, 2011 at 10:34 PM UTC
You said I didn’t love you.
The shock rang through my heart
You said it now, not once but twice
No explanation did depart
Could I be so undeserving?
That you dispel unbinding ties
Bloodline assumes preserving
Could you possibly advise?
From birth did you give notice?
That two held every key
My father and my mother
Adoration my decree
Your influence was precious
Did you fail to realize?
Obedience was not of fear
But heartfelt love inside
Whatever I am now or then
What’s good came from you two
The bad may shame and bring you pain
But it doesn’t come from you.
Hopeless, sad and hollow
My private, padded cell
I contemplate and ponder
How I bring you down as well
If I could only touch your heart
Perhaps a glimpse you’d see
The glowing love I have inside
For the two that created me.
For you I’d give the stars and sky
I’d sacrifice my life
If that would stop one worry
In the footsteps of your life
In dreams I make you happy
I’m steady, proud, and strong
I shower you with all your wants
Your problems are all gone.
You told me I don’t love you.
That broke my heart to pieces
From my first cry to eternity
My love for you increases.
Apr 1, 2011
Apr 1, 2011 at 6:35 PM UTC
It was one year ago, this day
From my loving arms
They took both away
Still in pain, I cannot look
The toys are gone
So are the books.
My mind denies the memories
Will my sweets remember me?
I fell apart. I was not strong.
I lost the strength to carry on.
It was one year ago, this day
The horrid truth
They could not stay
I miss you so
So hard to hide
For all my life
I die inside.
Mar 30, 2011
Mar 30, 2011 at 11:17 PM UTC
Missy, Missy Mortimer
How does your steel heart beat?
Your bloodline oxidized by hate
Satan can’t compete.
Missy, Missy Mortimer
Who do you think you are?
A pure facade of intellect
Matched by your ugly scars.
Missy, Missy Mortimer
Obstinate, careless, crude…
Hell awaits your filthy soul
As you practice being rude.
Missy, Missy Mortimer
Insult; demean; degrade
The power you pretend to hold
In your foolish mind is made
You cast away the moral code
Or perhaps it’s just amiss
You justify your horrid ways
Your arrogance now bliss.
Manipulation, you hold dear
As if all cannot see
With precision you decide your mark
You aim, and shoot; well pleased.
Missy, Missy Mortimer
No warning you deserve
To crush and stomp on human hearts
Compassion; no reserve
Oh Missy, you may think you’ve won
A pin for your collection
You controlled and shoved me out your door
Unjustified rejection.
As soon as I can gain the strength
Forgiveness I shall find
Your ugliness is pitiful
But the Lord’s a friend of mine.
He watched you’re actions closely
He sadly shook his head
Your Father, He wants more for you
But on thin ice, you tread.
Missy, Missy, Mortimer
I pray you hear His call
Until then, you stand on the edge
Your back against the wall.
Mar 30, 2011
Mar 30, 2011 at 10:02 PM UTC
Colorful and tempting,
Convincing me of need;
Your evil calls me closer;
Justifies the feed.
Pain teams to join the wanting
Convincing trails you leave
Fueled with my desire
I gently follow thee.
Momentary satisfaction
Relieved, relaxed, and strong.
Your love I now desire
Caught up in magic for too long.
Soon the joy deserts me
Inside I’d always known
You’d make your stay a short one
Your true intent now shown
Now Fear joins Pain to haunt me
How foolish I have been
To trust, to want, to live for
The satisfaction from within.
You beg my heart for mercy
Envelope me with love
Seductive, proud and tempting
Like legends I’ve heard of
I want you, deeply. Badly.
Take away my pain
Your lies began to fade, now
Light now turns into shade.
I feel you, know you, sense you
Like part of me, you are.
Do I need you for existence?
Is the need, too much, bizarre?
No, something is not right, here.
I’ve lost now who I am
You almost got me this time,
Norco, you almost did me in.
Mar 28, 2011
Mar 28, 2011 at 10:35 PM UTC
Shush. (I don’t exist today).
I’m a figment of your mind at play.
Shush. (I hear not what you said).
Your anger does not enshroud my head.
Shush. (Those memories do not linger).
The song is gone, so is the singer.
Shush. (You don’t exist to me).
We never touched, you did not flee.
Shush. (This heart does not feel deeply).
You did not sell your soul so cheaply.
Shush. (The moments don’t click by.)
Mans creation; an imagined lie.
Shush. (Reality is not near).
Don’t disagree; you are not here.
Mar 28, 2011
Mar 28, 2011 at 1:46 PM UTC
Gumdrops come in many colors
Yellow, orange and green
My gumdrop hides his color
So his feelings can’t be seen
His character is charming
His humor can’t be beat
He’s loving, kind; a friend of mine
Yet, he creates his own defeat
Avoidance is an issue,
Procrastination set in stone
His fears are locked so deep inside
He fights the world alone.
I understand his silent walk
My feet step in his tracks
Circumstances changed the soul;
True confidence we lack.
When tragedies besieged him
His body young in years
He coped the only way he could
While fighting back the tears
He lost himself eventually
Gave in to worldly sins
But, Gumdrop has the strength of few
He stood-up, once again.
With work, he rose above the clan
Temptation everywhere
He faithfully now walks the walk
Recovery he shares
Sadness still surrounds him
Eyes open for dark skies
Preparing for the looming breach,
He limits joy inside
Why would he risk familiar odds?
Reality is rough
To avoid the possibilities,
Is safer than to trust
Don’t try to understand him
He won’t let you in
He’s had to learn the hard way
He won’t get kicked, again.
But I am pretty lucky,
I’ve known him for so long
With memories and good times
and Billy Joel’s top songs
I wish for him bright colors
Prayers I’m always sending
But Gumdrop holds the steering wheel
He writes the script and ending
Yep. Gumdrop is a blessing
My friend he’ll always be
Can he step outside his comfort zone?
I guess we’ll have to see.
Mar 20, 2011
Mar 20, 2011 at 7:51 PM UTC
Hit me with your best shot
Show me what your wit’s not
Expose the heart you’ve not got
You’ll likely take the dare
Looking good you think so
Such a fool, you don’t know
The world’s a stage for no show
I see through you like air
Running scared you fight life
Caring not, you mock strife
Instead you wield the sharp knife
I jump your worthless snare
Kick me when I’m real low
Better me them some joe
God knows you’ve got enough foe
See if me you scare
Justify your filthy deeds
Violence fulfills your needs
So old now, where did that lead?
And you say life’s not fair
You’ll get what’s coming- just wait
The narrow road is too late
You spit upon the Lord’s gate
***** you, I don’t care.
Mar 18, 2011
Mar 18, 2011 at 6:15 PM UTC