She died,
she was broken,
was muted,
and then lived.
Her eyes were full yet empty,
like a blank paper there was nothing written down.
Her heart, filled yet hollow,
carved out by pain, sadness and loneliness.
She died,
she was broken,
was muted,
and then lived.
Her mind never walked away,
her mind never got over it.
After years, months, weeks and days.
How did this happen?
How do you live after trauma?
How am I supposed to live?
She died,
she was broken,
was muted,
and then lived.
Jul 12, 2018
Jul 12, 2018 at 12:02 PM UTC
The answer is i don't know..
Or do i know?
coke
xtc
mdma
tramadol
eph
xanax
cannabis
hasj
speed/amphetamine
2cc
flunitrazepam
codeine
vallium
ritalin
concerta
lsd/acid
bromazepam
lorazepam
2cb
etizolam
4fa
ketamine
2fa/2fma
ghb
mephedrone (meow meow)
methox
And i'm pretty sure my list won't end there.
It's not that i can't stop but i just don't want to feel reality.
Aug 14, 2015
Aug 14, 2015 at 9:53 PM UTC
This is not a poem just some phrases to explain my past psychosis.
I lived in complete darkness full of sad noises,
strange images
and blurry figures.
I lived in complete darkness with no love,
no emotions
and no feelings.
I kept asking myself "what's going on",
"is this the end"
and "will this ever end".
I saw spiders,
mouses
and more animals on my wall.
I heard voices ,
noises
and some of them were in my head.
I couldn't think,
sleep
or live.
I couldn't be.
I couldn't be me.
I wasn't me.
I wished i could die, so this all would end.
Aug 14, 2015
Aug 14, 2015 at 9:49 PM UTC
Everything about you
makes my knees weak
and my hands tremble
You’re the reason my heart is pumping,
though it skips a few beats
and falters,
much like my words
when I try to tell you
how much you mean to me
Feb 26, 2015
Feb 26, 2015 at 7:53 AM UTC
I live in constant fear of losing the attention i'm getting from you
May 26, 2014
May 26, 2014 at 5:12 PM UTC
you
me
the world
life
being alive
being me
breathing
everything
May 17, 2014
May 17, 2014 at 2:25 PM UTC
I'm numb so numb and I would like to ask you something
Can you please..
**** the pain out of me , fill me with pills so i can stay numb forever
Fill me with opiates and watch me die inside
Don't worry i will feel no pain
Look at me in my eyes and tell me you love me then leave me
So i can feel pain again
Then fill me with benzos make me dreamy and love my life
So you can hurt me again
Choke me hurt me and belittle me
Make me walk around with bruises
Heal my wounds , buy me pills
opiates , oplïods and benzos
Make me happy for a week or less
then leave me behind wondering why you left me
so i will feel pain and then I need to crawl back to pills
or to you
May 17, 2014
May 17, 2014 at 7:06 AM UTC