life - Hello Poetry

I see my timeline on this site: 2014 From my older brother's diagnosis to the death of my grandmother 2015 Falling in love with you My brother disappearing 2017 To the breaking of trust in exchange of fluids Never receiving what the law calls justice 2018 Realizing you were never my first love Merely my first attachment But I never wrote about finding my brother dead in the woods near the main road white bones in a tent not knowing who it was only realizing after the police left my mother crying for him dying there alone in the woods so close to home I cry for him dying there alone. Hidden by the wilderness rotting away inside the plastic tarp. I cried for him and wrote for you. This timeline is my reminder holding my guilty conscience accountable.

0

Dec 28, 2022

Dec 28, 2022 at 8:59 AM UTC

2014 - 2018

I see my timeline on this site: 2014 From my older brother's diagnosis to the death of my grandmother 2015 Falling in love with you My brother disappearing 2017 To the breaking of trust in exchange of fluids Never receiving what the law calls justice 2018 Realizing you were never my first love Merely my first attachment But I never wrote about finding my brother dead in the woods near the main road white bones in a tent not knowing who it was only realizing after the police left my mother crying for him dying there alone in the woods so close to home I cry for him dying there alone. Hidden by the wilderness rotting away inside the plastic tarp. I cried for him and wrote for you. This timeline is my reminder holding my guilty conscience accountable.

29

Oh dear, you spoil me I wanna kiss you but I don't wanna test my gag reflexes.

0

Jan 8, 2018

Jan 8, 2018 at 10:11 AM UTC

**** You

Oh dear, you spoil me I wanna kiss you but I don't wanna test my gag reflexes.

4

He was not good company in my despair. But he was company and he was the only company I had. I share that night with him. Only him. We were the only two that breathed oxygen from the air I screamed in. The only two who felt the blows exchanged by fists. We were the only two who shared that time and space. No matter who and how many people I tell my story, he will still be the only one who was actually there. We are connected. We are connected and I don't know how to free myself from these memories. Free myself from this Hell.

0

Jun 5, 2017

Jun 5, 2017 at 9:06 AM UTC

Free my Soul

He was not good company in my despair. But he was company and he was the only company I had. I share that night with him. Only him. We were the only two that breathed oxygen from the air I screamed in. The only two who felt the blows exchanged by fists. We were the only two who shared that time and space. No matter who and how many people I tell my story, he will still be the only one who was actually there. We are connected. We are connected and I don't know how to free myself from these memories. Free myself from this Hell.

12

I do not miss him. Nor do I miss myself as a victim. I'm neither suffering nor melancholic. Nothing pulls me back. Nothing at all, except that I was whole. Maybe I was a victim, but at least I was something. Maybe it was painful, but at least I felt something.

0

May 27, 2017

May 27, 2017 at 11:41 AM UTC

Assault Me

I do not miss him. Nor do I miss myself as a victim. I'm neither suffering nor melancholic. Nothing pulls me back. Nothing at all, except that I was whole. Maybe I was a victim, but at least I was something. Maybe it was painful, but at least I felt something.

6

Long walks by the sea Drinking champain Self-loathing

0

Oct 9, 2015

Oct 9, 2015 at 12:23 PM UTC

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