Silent screams
begging for life,
dying on my lips.
Empty emotions
crying for love,
burning in my heart.
Torn thoughts
craving stability,
leaking out of me.
I'm a mess of opposites
burning inside,
trying to come out of sealed box.
I am nothing
and everything all at once.
I feel found and
lost,
close yet
so far
from everything I crave.
Everything is clear
and yet
nothing makes sense.
Apr 27, 2021
Apr 27, 2021 at 7:48 PM UTC
.
nothingness
this is what I feel
nothing
No love
No passion
No hate
just
nothing
and I don't know how to fix It
this thing that isn't me
this nothingness
that consumes me
i yearn for more
just something
to
fill
the nothing
.
Apr 13, 2019
Apr 13, 2019 at 4:54 PM UTC
...
daughter
sister
aunt
niece
granddaughter
nice
sweet
good girl
baby faced
lost
unemployed
uneducated
questioning
wandering
stuck
dissapointing
hopeful
sinful
alone
sad
happy
grateful.....
i am so many things
but..
Who Am I?
Mar 29, 2019
Mar 29, 2019 at 8:21 PM UTC
my thoughts are sludge,
heart beating fast.
every touch like flame,
all across my back.
my body is hot,
muscles tensed.
every tingle buzzing,
every feeling sensed.
warmth spreads
from flame to core
from me to you
flowing constantly
rhythmically
heating us up
so hot i pulse
nothing exists but
you and i
passion swirling around
us
consuming our flames
sweet soft caresses
powerful expressions of
love
of raw need
wrapped in care
devotion
exploding
in a final show
of our want
of each other
your soft caress,
kissing my back.
everything relaxed,
falling asleep fast.
your arms hold me,
keeping me safe.
every movement softens,
everything in it's place.
Dec 3, 2018
Dec 3, 2018 at 11:10 PM UTC
I'm a brick wall
Not in the sense of stubbornness or
being close minded
But in reference to my outer shell
With which no emotion can pass through
And to most it means
There is no place where my emotion dwells
Or worse they take a wrecking ball to the strong wall
Hoping to crack my resistance
Only giving more reason to build it higher, wider
They claw at my walls
Not bothering to knock with gentle hands
Delicate touch opening the door
Not barreling through
Looking and knowing there's a wall
To keep my feelings in
Not to keep others out
Sadly no one knocks at a hidden door
So do I make a new door,
Tear down a wall,
Or wait a whole life for someone who might never knock?
Aug 23, 2018
Aug 23, 2018 at 4:49 PM UTC
I was lucky
Drama never exploded upon me
Half-truths
Half-lies
I never took part in them
Being shy and quiet,
I never really cared for it
Nasty mean words
Hate that poors from mouths like
Bile
I always thought drama was a way for attention seekers to be seen
And a way to hurt people deemed worthy
Such a lovely way to be noticed
Through rumors and hate
Thick sludge that even the pureness of honesty can't defeat
Honesty was a strong suit for me
A quiet girl with little to say
Why say something if it's a lie?
And most honesty hurts others so I stayed quiet
I had poetry anyway
Poetry
A language of it's own
Flowing, curt, inspiring
It was magic to me
Somehow it still is
A magic that is real,
Yet feels so unreal
Why would I tamper poetry
With petty drama?
It's pure beauty enables emotion to meet a life in ink
All emotion freely flowing from a pen to a page
Erasing and capturing them into glimpses of what is real and felt
Instead of lies I tell truths
Which is why I rarely speak
The truth is hard to handle
I don't want to be half of something
I'm so whole and full to the brim of life
How would it be right to speak half,
To live half a life?
It wouldn't be fair
So no half-truths
Only fullness
To represent the life I have to give
Aug 20, 2018
Aug 20, 2018 at 2:06 AM UTC
-
*Soft hair
Freckled skin
Shut lips
Quiet steps
Sad eyes
Curled toes
Shaky hands
Dull clothes
Scarred soul*
Overall: lost
-
Aug 14, 2018
Aug 14, 2018 at 9:01 PM UTC
do you still read my poetry?
take in every line
search for meaning
and for me
curious what you'll find
do you still think about me?
wonder how i am
read through my rhymes
through my lies
i hope to say you can
do you hate my stupidity?
raging at my hope
seeing my pathetic mess
the ludicrousness
hurt that i won't mope
do you still read my poetry?
get wrapped up in my words
hope to find i'm alright
the truth i hide
is that what i deserve?
do you still read my poetry?
for I still want you to
marvel at the wonders
my little treasures
it's more than you deserve
Jul 25, 2018
Jul 25, 2018 at 1:21 AM UTC
"fall for the eyes, they will never fade"
but what of a smile?
how he slyly grins
after freely teasing me.
or after his booming laugh,
how his whole face radiates joy.
his bemused smile after I see him
sneakily steal snacks before dinner.
but most of all, its him beaming
after I accomplish the smallest tasks:
every clumsy ballet recital,
every modest theater performance,
every time I step out of my small world,
and everything in-between.
Thank you for smiling with me Dad.
I love you for that.
Jun 14, 2018
Jun 14, 2018 at 12:51 PM UTC
I enjoy singing
not in a grand way.
But I hum and sing to
my favorite songs.
Losing my voice is such a big fear.
In more ways than one,
it connects my thoughts
to the world.
I used to believe
my voice wasn't worth hearing.
That being silent would be easier
then being heard.
I don't have anything special.
I can carry a tune
and run words together
But not in a grand way.
I sing because I enjoy it.
I write to feel my emotions, show my perspective.
It's not very magnificent,
but no one else could do it quite
like me.
Jun 5, 2018
Jun 5, 2018 at 8:03 PM UTC