they say god gave us all a purpose in life, and we'll spend our entire life looking for it. But when I sit on the grass whilst the sun is beaming down on me leaving an iridescent glow, and the flowers are gently hugging my every cut, I start to believe that this is my purpose.. you know to live.
To embrace the life I was given, no matter how bad things get.
Apr 24, 2014
Apr 24, 2014 at 2:11 AM UTC
why did you come and try to make me fall in love with you
why did you cheat on me
why did I forgive you all those times
why did I let you take my virginity
why did you say I love you first
why did i love you too
why did I open up to you
why did you open up to me
why did I meet your mom
why did I meet your family
why did you meet mine
why did you cheat on me in the summer when I was gone
why did I let it go
why were you closest to me when we thought I was pregnant
why did I buy you all those presents
why did I fall in love with you
why did you claim to be in love too
why did you break our relationship up why did you stop the love
why did you leave me when I needed you the most
why did you pretend to care
why did you use me these months
why did you break me
why aren't you still there
Apr 24, 2014
Apr 24, 2014 at 1:55 AM UTC
they say the good outweighs the bad.
but what if lately the bad has been outweighing the good?
what if i cant look at you the same anymore
what if im trying so hard to find someone to replace you
i havent cried in 6 days.. and im not starting now
Im just stuck in this loop and honestly i want out
i plead the day June comes
i cant take it anymore
i hate this
but i wont let u know
i wont let u see me cry
im tired of letting people see me weak
i want them to see me at my strongest even if im not that strong
Apr 24, 2014
Apr 24, 2014 at 1:51 AM UTC
it makes no sense
how you tousle with my fragile heart.
you have all these hearts in the palm of your hand yet you always seem to want mine more.
it makes no sense
how you kiss her goodbye just to kiss me hello, you have her already why do you need me too?
it makes no sense
how you love her but you're in love with me, love isn't like this.
it makes no sense
how I know exactly what you do,
but I stay, I let you use and take from me knowing how deeply in love with you I am.
Apr 15, 2014
Apr 15, 2014 at 5:44 PM UTC
I might like you more than I thought I did. ****
Mar 30, 2014
Mar 30, 2014 at 12:13 AM UTC
March 10,2012; 9:26 pm
you looked me in my eye, with the utter most sincerity. your words stammered. your face was flushed. it became clear, the sweet words that danced and glided off your tongue, took me by surprise. the words that would soon rule my life.
the words that will forever harvest their reign I'm my faint heart.
Mar 29, 2014
Mar 29, 2014 at 7:10 PM UTC
I regret slipping under a strangers covers, I regret letting you have your way with me.
I wish I didn't go so paralyzed at that moment. on the inside I screamed at you to get off of me
but on the outside I was frozen. Physically you hurt me, and although you were not my first time, I didn't want to go all the way with you.
I cant, I can't sleep because your soulless image keeps appearing in my head.
I am disgusted with myself, and even more disgusted with you.
Your name and this haunting thought makes me want to throw up. Who knew this once innocent girl, would turn out to be not so innocent anymore.
Mar 29, 2014
Mar 29, 2014 at 11:41 AM UTC
like yin and yang we are different
im the sun and you are the moon
I am the flowers and you are the stars
like day and night we are different
you are the smile and I'm the laugh
you are the beauty and I am what's left.
Mar 29, 2014
Mar 29, 2014 at 12:14 AM UTC
people ask me all the time why I like dubstep, and honestly it's because of the beats and the sounds they make, each beat and rhythm of a song reminds me of a person or a story. most of my favorite songs remind me of you, although they are just beats they tell a story. the strong over powering beats remind me of how hard and fast I fell in love with you & how crazy this roller coaster of our love has been. the lovely melodic beats remind me of the fluttering you left in my heart last summer , when we sat in the play ground and you kissed me in the jungle gym for the first time in a month. You're beautiful to me, just like beats are. I make beats in my head out of the way you walk, talk, and when we make love. I love you like I love dubstep, I love you immensely.
Mar 29, 2014
Mar 29, 2014 at 12:04 AM UTC
we should have never met, I don't know why we met and frankly everyday up until now I was glad that we met. I was happy that I had someone so amazing in my life that made my heart sink and made me laugh. you made my life complete , you made every little bit and peice of it seem worth it. you see i never had a "good life" ,I'm one of those people that are doomed with a too big heart and too many problems. but my problems all seemed to be so real when I was with you. they stoped being the little things I kept stored in the back of my mind, they came out when I was with you. and people would think that it's supposed to be the other way around, but you made me weak. you made me vulnerable, I fell in love with you and I couldn't be strong and hide all my **** problems anymore ; because you broke me down. you opened up every part of me and let it all come out. no one can do that but you. no one ever saw the real me. no one saw the bruises my parents left me, nor did they see how I cried my eyes out when the alley cat died. or how I left every trace of disappointment I had, on my wrist in blood. but none of that ever mattered to you, because I was never adequate for you. in your eyes I will never amount to anything. I'm just a girl with problems that not even I can handle. you never looked at me while I was laughing or smiling or dancing and thought to yourself how much u really loved me, maybe it's because you never did. I was just the first person that fell in love with you, that's it. that's what I will always be. I always thought that you loved me. u know just a little but you didn't. you've broken my heart so many times in one year that I finally broke down. I finnally realized that I'm not as strong as I used to be when I met you. I realized that I wish I never met you. I wish you met her first, and I wish she fell in love with you and you had the best year of your life with her. I would have never gone to the hospital that day in May, and I would have never told everyone I wanted to die and I would have never meant it. the one thing in this world that kept me together was my strenght to keep it all sealed up but you unsealed me like a pro. which leads me to now. March 14th. I have been up for hours contemplating every little aspect of my life and wondering how I let myself get so damaged, I also wondered how life would be without me but I'm weak and can't find it in me to take my own life away. I wish I wasn't. I wish that I was never given this too hard of a job life. I can feel the weight of this world on me just trying to bring me down and im going down with it. I was never meant for such a life, i have always been miserable. since the day I could remember; my life was not a walk in the park. I'm sorry for thinking that a boy that has everything and is so well put together with not a care in this world would ever love me. we're opposites and it was doomed from the start. we should have saved eachother the trouble that day in November. our life's would have turned out different. maybe I would have been happy. & maybe you would have fell in love.
Mar 14, 2014
Mar 14, 2014 at 4:06 AM UTC