what constitutes a cheater?
because when i promised myself to you,
i meant every part
i meant even my mind, too
i meant i'd never have that kind of touch
that kind of love
to anybody else,
i promised it'd be only you i dreamed of
so why, oh why, do i feel like I've been lied to
because i thought you promised too
i thought you only wanted my touch
but instead, you wanted two
Apr 13, 2016
Apr 13, 2016 at 11:16 PM UTC
if you asked me how it hurts,
i'd answer simply
that it doesn't
that nothing is wrong and I am
perfectly fine
but in actuality
I am a walking chasm
a deep gaping hole
that nobody wants to fall into
and those who love me
must feel so much shame
that they have to
take care of this mess
and if you asked me how it hurts
if you really wanted to know
i'd tell you
it hurts like smiling all day, laughing,
and coming home and attempting
to cry myself to sleep
and when that doesn't work, ill
let the drugs do the job
it hurts like waking up in the middle of the night
willing God
or whoever
to please, please not wake me up in the morning
it hurts in my chest, I guess that's why they call it
heartbreak
so don't ask me how it hurts
if you don't want to hear
that it hurts so bad, i think i might
die
Apr 13, 2016
Apr 13, 2016 at 11:10 PM UTC
he is sleeping and I know how
he is grumpy if he is tired
I know when he wakes up
he'll be confused and vulnerable
I know his eyes might hurt if he forgot to
take out his contacts
i know he won't be ready to wake
even if he promised
"just five more minutes"
i know he'll be ready for a smoke as soon
as he opens his eyes
so ill wake him up with a kiss
and a joint
Mar 27, 2016
Mar 27, 2016 at 10:00 PM UTC
and he holds me, wraps his arms
around my body
pushing into me
showing me who's it is
he knows what I want
out of breath
"yes please"
open-mouthed kisses
making love
Mar 27, 2016
Mar 27, 2016 at 9:57 PM UTC
I don't think that people go to cemeteries
to pay their respects
I think they go
because they need to pretend
that
body is sleeping, only resting
6 feet under
I think that they need the grass to hold on to
So they feel they're not falling
off the Earth
They need to lay the flowers down,
as an apology
"I'm sorry
I have to forget about you."
Mar 21, 2016
Mar 21, 2016 at 9:18 PM UTC
I am an apology
I am a promise
that I will do better next time
I am aching
I am sorry
Sometimes I feel
that I'd rather not wake up
I feel that
I don't need to be a mistake
any longer
Mar 21, 2016
Mar 21, 2016 at 9:14 PM UTC
I kiss goodbye, goodbye, goodbye
to the good times
Goodbye sun,
It's been fun and I don't think
you're ever coming up again
Now,
this isn't a suicide letter
because I only mean that everything
is already gone
and it's never
coming
back
Mar 21, 2016
Mar 21, 2016 at 9:12 PM UTC
woman found
stabbed in the neck on butlers lane
but she wasn't a woman
she only breathed 18 years
of breath
and she only got to have 18 years
worth of smiles
laughs, tears,
aches, pains,
her future was stolen by envy
Mar 21, 2016
Mar 21, 2016 at 9:09 PM UTC
I stopped questioning if God was real at 3am one night
in a church parking lot
I was in the front seat, on top of a boy
who would not even drive to my house to see me,
we'd always meet up
and when he told me to take off my clothes I did
and when he told me "I dreamt about this"
it stuck
when I closed my car door, and went on my way home
that is when I stopped believing in God
because I already knew that he wouldn't call tomorrow
and I already knew the familiar bleeding of my wrists would
lull me to sleep
and I already knew he'd be back in a month
speaking of love and forgiveness
I stopped believing in God
when I found it in a person, and I decided
God isn't such a nice guy.
Mar 15, 2016
Mar 15, 2016 at 10:10 PM UTC
it hurts even to remember
the way you used to burn through my brain
and sometimes when I'm alone
ill come across a hole burnt through my head
like drunken nights where I put out cigarettes on my skin
and I draw a blank, I start to feel it again
stay the **** away from me
Mar 15, 2016
Mar 15, 2016 at 9:54 PM UTC